December 3, 2005
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Wedding Kisses
I was watching the movie “Wedding Singer” the other night with Adam Sandler and Drew Barrymore. In the movie there is a discussion about what type of kiss is appropriate at the end of a wedding. I have been at a ton of weddings. There is a point right after you get married where it appears as if you are invited to every wedding in America. Everyone wants you to be in their wedding party.
But with all the months of planning that go into a wedding, very little attention and preparation is given to the kiss. How can I tell? For some people the moment is so awkward. They are kissing in front of a few hundred people for the first time. So they are not exactly sure of how to go about it. Now we were told to practice in advance. So we were prepared for the kiss. But others are not always given the same instruction.
In the movie “Wedding Singer,” the issue was discussed of the type of kiss that should be given. One thought was that it should be just a short simple kiss. The other thought was that it should be a open-mouthed french kiss. There was some discomfort with this idea. So the compromise was that it should be opened mouth but still just a light touching of the tongues. I am of the opinion that most couples probably kiss too short in their wedding.
So here is the options:
# 1 Short and simple kiss.
# 2 Open mouth but simple.
# 3 French Kiss, stick tongue down throat kiss.
Which kiss is most appropriate at the end of the wedding?
Comments (198)
1st.
second?
NOOOO!!!!!!
I say number 1…<> dang.
#1
I’d say open mouth but simple. It’s just short enough where it’s not long and awkward for the audience, but long enough where you don’t look like it’s forced. Moderation is always the way to go in this type of thing.
#1 or #2.
kiss as you would naturally.
or #3 if you’re getting married by an Elvis impersonator.
Open mouth but simple.
2 or 3….but maybe a cross between them would be best.
eleveny!!
Are those my only choices? I hate them all. When I’m at a wedding, I prefer to see a longish kiss that at least APPEARS to be close-mouthed.
But lest I seem judgmental, it shouldn’t be planned. It should be spontaneous and whatever feels right to the participants. It’s their day, after all.
#2
1
the guy im going to marry will probably have a problem with it, but you are expressing your deepest feelings for someone in front of a bunch of people and i think you should really kiss each other, none of this quick peck type stuff. i suppose #2 would be alright, but personally id prefer #3
number two.
somewhere between 1 and 2
I was crying through my kiss…I can’t even remember it! But I’m for short and sweet…unless you want to incite the crowd…then it’s dip the bride and French her to death!
#1. They have the rest of their lives to kiss
#2. It should be passionate and sincere but not make the audience uncomfortable.
number 2. you have to show passion and that you do love each other
Somewhere between #1 and #2… modest but still with love.
2
1… perhaps 2 for some people. I don’t think people will be too judgmental, being that it’s their marriage.
Methinks 2.
I think 2.
the second one… I would think….
Open mouth and simple … keep the good stuff for the honeymoon!! The Wedding Singer was such a fun movie … I loved the part when they practiced the kiss!! P.S. – Love your new profile pic!!
maybe a longer kiss that’s close mouthed…. but of the above choices I would go with number 1
number 1 or number 2
well i havn’t been married, and am more inclined to say go with the moment. but just pre-thinking tells me that the second would be the best.
“A kiss is just a kiss”, for the end of the wedding #1 or #2. Save #3 for when you’re alone.
We went with the second option, we actually had a very long and passionate kiss at our wedding. people were actually clapping for an encore, haha. I agree with you, a lot of people kiss so shortly and inpersonal at the end of their ceremony, and that is really sad because a kiss is supposed to be something that’s passionate and personal, and a peck type of kiss is like, kissing your mother/father or brother/sister or grandparent. Sometimes, I feel like I can tell what their married life is going to be like by the way that they kiss at the end of the ceremony.
I think a short, simple, but PASSIONATE kiss would be good.
A longer, but simple (close mouthed!!) kiss is the best. A closed mouth kiss can be much more intimate and sweet than trying choke your new husband or wife.
2! gotta have a little sexiness i mean it’s your day and the people are there well why care about them?
2..1 would be too simple..and 3 would be too much..if you did one you would be thinking damn it..that was my wedding kiss..it should have been more..and 3 would leave all the old folk thinking you were..who knows what they’d think
between 1 and 2, nobody wants to watch the bride and groom make out for a few minutes while they just sit there. Unless loud obnoxious whistling is allowed, at which point it becomes funny. Keep it short and sweet, guys, come on
Short and sweet. A wedding it not the place to make out.
#2 because you don’t want to be making out in front of your friends and family, I wouldn’t want to anyway.
#2
#2, but #1 would be fine too!
1 or 2, our wedding kiss was so short the photographer got the very end when we were pulling away from each other so we had to do a posed kiss for the camera
I think it depends on what YOU want. Having a really over-the-top couple who’s always loud and hyper pull a #1 would just look stupid.
-Hil
#2
#3 can be done without being disgusting.
If the bride and groom don’t kiss passionately- I feel sad and want to scream:
“YOU JUST GOT MARRIED! KISS PASSIONATELY!”
((( GRANDMA HUGS )))
Lori
EWwwwWWWWW
Kissing is gross!!!!!!
Putting your tongue in someone else’s mouth is GROSSSSSSS!!!!!
You adults are all sickos.
Ha ha ha ha ha!!!
it doesn’t matter as long as it is real!
1
#2, I think.
heck where is the 4th optiom just “gettin on” right there in the church
You blog a lot.
#2…three seems a bit skeezy for my taste. But I get embarrassed easily, so…
Hey, I have been reading your profile for quite some time…and really enjoy it. I was reading the newspaper today, and saw an article about the new movie…The Cronicles or Narnia…and it was talking about CS Lewis, so ill put the link here…..
http://www.stltoday.com/stltoday/news/stories.nsf/religion/story/C8324F96F9DE5E1A862570CC000EB669?OpenDocument&highlight=2%2C%22C.S.%22+AND+%22Lewis%22
I prefer #2 for myself….
But couples should do whatever they are comforatble with… it’s their day.
#2, you dont want to be like all into it on top of the altar…. thats just wrong
have a wonderful day
michael
Short and simple. It’s ceremony …not a porno.
i think #2 is what i’d want. of just a long closed mouth kiss. sometimes, those are the most amazing anyway
short and simple…. the wedding guests come from different areas of the peoples lives… grandparents don’t want to see tongue fights.
*or just a…
2
#4: whichever comes naturally with a few hundred ppl staring.
Depends on the audience
I know people who do not kiss until they are married, so they cannot practice prior to “You may kiss the bride.” I say #2.
Just a normal kiss. Me and Jonathan already discussed this one.
168 days until the wedding!
More importantly, 13 days until his graduation!!
#2, just b/c a crowd is around doesn’t mean the affection should be stuffy. A loooong french kiss would be over the top though, I think
I’d say #1.
i guess socially it’d be better to do 1 so less people are offended, but i think people should just do what they want. if they want their friends and family to see them do #3 and they don’t give a crap then more power to them.
#2 or 3 because I mean, it’s their wedding and well, they shouldn’t be embarassed to show love for each other.
*jayne
2…save the tonguing for when your audience is down to just two & not hundreds. ahh….luv weddings! Wedding Singer is an awesome movie! Vive la comedie!!!! Cheers!
Megan
this may sound like an odd question
but if this is the ‘theologians’ cafe… and you obviously love lewis… where is the theology?
#2…open mouth, but simple.
When I was a kid, I went to my cousin’s wedding. She and her new hubby went with #3. After this slurping kiss that seemed to last an eternity, they pulled apart, and there was a long, silvery thread of saliva connecting their mouths. Bleh! I was traumatized for life.
open mouth but simple
whatever feels right at the moment.. But a short peck seems like they are kissing their brother or sister…
You post so frequently that I fall behind. I do have to wonder how you manage to read all these comments. O_O
In any event, I would place the choice to the bride and the groom. For me, I’d prefer the first choice.
3. its their wedding, the moment is sort of whatever the couple makes it to be, so everyone will just go along with it. who would think of that kind of kiss as innapropriate…FOR A WEDDING?
no one.
unless you do
?
x333 carly
Probably #1.
I’d say two. Sweet and simple always sounds good to me.
Between 2 and 3.
I think it should be simple, no tongue, but linger for a few seconds. Not a peck, but a (nearly) closed-lips kiss that lasts for say a good 5-10 seconds. You don’t want it to be too brief, b/c it’s a special and important moment, but you also don’t want to make Grandma Nellie feel uncomfortable.
I liked the open mouth simple approach – it could’ve only been improved if he had given my ass a bit of a pinch during the kiss versus the walk through the guests with a kung fu grip on it. Ok he didn’t do that but I secretly would’ve LOVED IT!
I’ve never been in a wedding except my own. What does that say about me? My family says it means I am not a good friend. My friends say it’s because I am not a traditional person. It’s risky to have me in a position that may require talking to others.
What do you think – not a good friend or scandelous turd stirrer?
ps- since our wedding hubby has been a groomsman 4 times. I have yet to ever be a bridesmaid.
#2. I mean, you just got married for goodness sake. You can kiss your spouse, it’s ok. BUT, you don’t want to make the audience too uncomfortable. Personally, I think it’d be a bit awkward to makeout with my brand new husband right in front of my dad (since my dad’s doing the wedding) and the entire church.
In between 1&2
NOT number 3!
i think that u should basically do what feels right…i know that my husband and i did what felt right and we ended up kissing for a long time…the judge and my witnesses at the courthouse started laughing…
#2, that way its not to awkward for the audience….
2. That is what I think would be most comfortable for me. I think that whoever is getting married should kiss how it’s comfortable for them.
I’m not sure; at the rehearsal the day before, the preacher couldn’t get Gunnar to stop kissing me… but after the ceremony he forgot to!
He made up for it, though. *naughty grin*
2, because no one wants to see you get it on up there
I suppose #3 is downright tacky, unless that is the overall theme of the wedding to begin with.
Between #1-#2 is good, just kiss with all the love you have for eachother, knowing you are just married. There should be love and passion, just not porno.
#4 none of the above
I would do number 2, just enough to get the emotions stirred up but keep it tasteful
eeeeeewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww. A simple kiss is enough. Why would you want a hundred plus people to watch you french kiss.
I mean you can do other stuff during the honeymoon. duh.
i say go wiht the moment.
who cares what ur wedding guests say…lol
2, i suppozes.
#1
then the rest can be behind closed doors. haha *wink!
#2….save #3 for the bedroom, please! *rolls eyes*
Personally I think the kiss from the wedding singer was the best ever, just perfect
unless you are voyeuristic then, just go ahead and make out
I or maybe 2
Your site came up when I was signing in and thought it looked interesting. I prefer #1, maybe #2. I noticed that you have the same birthday as I do so Happy Belated Birthday!
1***
To me, #2 would be ideal. Perhaps something in between #2 and #3, because the kiss symbolizes a lot. I mean c’mon, the couple that just got married just promised themselves to be with each other until “death do them part”, so I think it deserves some passion. And, it shows the audience one’s enthusiasm for the marriage and the love one has for their partner.
Daniel
Ewww definitely not #3. I have been to weddings like that and I always wanted to gag.
I think #1. Number 2 does not bother me that much. I don’t like the idea of people watching me make out with my husband. I am not particularly keen on watching other people make out either.
Number 2 definitely. I agree that a lot of the time the kiss is awkward at weddings because people don’t really know what to do in front of their grandma and their great aunts and uncles and their parents!
One would be what i would go for. Two wouldn’t be too bad, people aren’t going to gasp in the church, so that wouldn’t hurt. Make it tasteful is the main thing.
Eva.
between numbers 1 and 2… maybe even with a little dip if they’re obviously bouncing up and down
how about a kiss they mean and signifies the beginning of their marriage?
2
#2
#1, possibly #2… long enough to be meaningful but not long enough to make people want to look away.
Any kiss is appropriate, they’re married.
the second one
I agree with elevny. You gotta make the scale bigger, dude. I got an eleveny for my wedding kiss. And damn-it…that stopped about 8 years ago.
#1. Otherwise granny might have a coronary…
Assuming you’re talking about the bride and groom and they’re the opposite sex, #3, or under rare circumstances, maybe even the unmentioned #4.
#2
#1
Whatever the married couple feels like doing. It isn’t the place of the guests to tell the couple how to kiss.
#2… open, but simple… you don’t want to make it wierd, i mean your parents and grandparents will be there, and kids… but don’t make it look like you don’t like each other.
Are these the only choices? I’ve pleasured my woman to climax at ALL of my weddings.
#2!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
nothing past 2. it depends on how comfortable you are kissing in front of people i guess… but i think french kissing would just be inconsiderate of all the people watching. it puts everyone in a very awkward situation.
#2. As they say in the movie, “church tongue”
2nd
whatever feels right at the moment. i don’t think there is a right or wrong way to kiss after the wedding.
How about this? A dip and a great kiss! That’s what I want.
Marriage is about the two people in love, not about what’s correct for the audience. The two lovers should kiss as if the entire guest list had melted away. The lovers should kiss as if this was the last kiss they would ever have. This is the kiss that proves their love and devotion to each other, so it better damn well be a good kiss.
NUMBER THREE!!
No, I’m jk jk jk. No. 1 of course.
1 OR2 YOU DON’T WANT EVERYONE THINKING YOU WERE PRACTICING!
We went with Option #1 at our first wedding, and Option #2 at our second wedding. [Explaination: First wedding (winter time) was in a room about the size of a closet at the courthouse, with just me, G, and the judge. Since we didn't know him from anyone, we went conservative on our first kiss as husband and wife. He was just standing there, looking at us, so we got out of the Wedding Closet quickly and got on with our lives. Second wedding (summer time) was in front of family and friends. Option #2 was perfectly suitable, especially since we'd already been married half a year at that point.] FYI: We didn’t stuff cake in each other’s faces, either. We were very nice to each other about that.
Lots of tongue.
#2 is good, but I think I agree with the folks who say 1 and a half. A kiss that appears closed mouthed, but longer, not a peck.
That’s a cute movie, by the way. As goofy as Sandler is, there’s a genuine sweetness to his romantic comedy stuff.
#2
Mine was short and simple, because like you said, there was no practice and it was awkward to be in front of all our families and make out.
But I guess my answer is “go w/ the theme of the wedding”. If it’s in a church and very “traditional” then short and simple, bordering w/ some light tongue. If it’s more fun, like outside or informal, then if you want to go wild and make people laugh, then so be it.
It’s your wedding, the only one you’ll get, so do what you feel is right.
#2, just like Drew and Adam practiced in the movie. I mean, hey…that won ‘best kiss’ at those silly MTV Awards that year.
#2
1 or 2 is appropriate, depending on how comfortable the couple is with the open-mouthed kiss. 3 is just plain inappropriate, unless you’re drunk and in Vegas getting married by Elvis at the Chapel-o’-Luv.
I’d have to say 1 or 2.
1 =)
#2… Absolutely… Maybe a bit of #3 but not overkill
1. c’mon your parents and old folks will be there.
I think option 1 or 2 would be best suited.
definitely between 1 and 2… 3 is out of the question..
2!!!!!!
However they usually kiss (and simply kiss not make out…no one wants to see a make out session at a wedding) should end the wedding. Its a celebration of two people who love each other. So just be comfortable. That seems to make sense.
#2, he’s my husband. ^^
And, I also saw that movie.
ahha.
Actually, I want him to pick me up off my feet twirl me around, then kiss me.
x3
I’d say #1
Open mouth but simple
#2
wait maybe #1, maybe 1.5 closed mouth but long and passionate
absolutely # 1
#2.
#3 can be okay if the wedding is somewhat casual and the guests are the laid-back type.
#2
1
#2. you have all night to practice the rest of your kissing and you don’t want your guest to become embarrassed
The second. It would be much to weird to French kiss eachother in front of a hundred people. Especially your parents.
3
Well depends how conservative your church is. I think the first one is most appropriate but it that persons wedding so they can decide.
# 2
I am getting married March of ’06. I havent talked about this with my fiance but we will probably do a #2 kiss. Though I would not be ashamed to do a number 3.
I’d say #2, especially if it’s your first kiss, make it count, but at the same time… be wary, you have family, in-laws, friends, etc, watching.
Probably between 2 and 3
100% whatever comes naturally. We have a photo of our kiss … it was perfect. Right out of an Audrey Hepburn movie. Although I remember thinking while we kissed … he’s pulling away too soon … I also remember thinking, ohmygosh there are 300 people watching us … we can kiss later. So it was a simple slightly open mouth kiss … just like normal. We only french during the hot and heavy times of our lives.
Number 2!!!!
simple and sweet.
your mom is watching!
number 1
#3 #3!
i dont like it
i think 2
# 2…..you should be able to get caught up in the moment, but not disgust people.
http://rewardhits.com/index.php?hit=6566 good site
I saw that movie..lol..they were practicing which kiss is appropriate at a wedding..
I would pick #1
Ha, just the other day I was talking to my girlfriend and I said at our wedding we better have a passionate, not to short kiss. Why? Because it will be my first time ever kissing her as my wife!! And that is exciting!!
1 or 2. 3 entails me wanting to tell whoever is kissing this passionately to get a room.
# 1.. they aren’t filming a porn movie..
Gay site. SO FUCKING GAY..
Hm… A Mix of two and three,please and thank you.
Number 2. Open mouth nothing porn starish…
the most appropriate kiss is whatever the bride and groom feel like.
Tiffany and I have descided not to kiss at all before our wedding. I’ll tell you something: My best man will be given a “do not disturb” sign to be used in case our kiss runs a little long: Making up for lost time, you understand!
#2
you don’t want to be too simple b/c it would seem awkward after just getting married, but you don’t want to make out in from of your grandma, either.
#2, both love can be shown and “easy-ending” cuz there would be some hands while a French Kiss…
1.5
Hi!
I can’t believe I found your very first post! Gah that took forever!
#1
#2
I would say 1.5/2, just make it tastefull! Think about it…would you french kiss infront of your grandparents?
#2
#2, definitely
200th comment on the first post!
=]=]=]
this has made my day
2
Short and simple. Save the tongue for the wedding night.
Happy New Year, Dan!
I think whatever feels right to the couple is the right way to do it.