Eighteen. Because then, it would be sexual harassment. :3
I say….
till about 4th year of age ^_^ no need for anymore after that.
But then again, is there really an age?
I know my parents sometimes spanked me, but that was when I was too little to listen. I think if a kid will behave without being spanked, they are too old.
Definitely not past age 7 or 8.
7or 8
middle school. 5th-6th gradeish. at whatever point you notice that they are physically maturing.
as soon as s/he leaves the womb. i don’t think spanking is okay.
I don’t personally support spanking at all, let alone past pre-school, but that is when I think it is no longer appropriate at all. just to clarify.
Well, that’s a tough one to answers since I don’t particularly support spanking. I don’t oppose it…I just don’t support it. So for all you people that spank your kids, I’m gonna have to go with…5.
But then it’s gonna be awhile till I have kids, so I haven’t really given the subject much consideration. Actually any…
12
They’re always too old to spank. It’s not right to spank a child – it’s abuse./
Thanks for commenting me!
I don’t believe in spanking.
I don’t support it at all, but I would think 4-5 would be the outside limit. It’s just icky after that.
Teenager. I do believe in spanking. Not beating. Not abuse. Just old-fashion spanking on the butt. Spare the rod…spoil the child. Lots of spoiled kids around nowadays.
since when is any child young enough to spank?
these people are crazy.. i’d say like 13 or 14… even then, if he/she acts up, there ain’t nothing wrong with a lil belting! why is it wrong to spank? doesn’t even the bible say “spare the rod and spoil the child”?
i would never spank but i think its risky beyond 4 years old.
I don’t think spanking really works.
I’d say it depends on the child and the maturity level of that child. Generally though, probably not past 6. Spanking, if done correctly, is certainly not abuse. Random, sudden, and/or overly harsh hitting and striking is abuse, not a quick smack on the butt, that’s only discipline.
-Jared
never be too old!
spanking is not the way to treat a kids, i think. a child doesn’t need physical punishment to be taught the right things.
the question assumes that spanking is a good thing … if and when i have children, there will never be an appropriate age to spank them … i don’t think toddlers fully understand why some adult is beating up on them, and once a child is past the toddler stage they are old enough to be reasoned with … to talk things through … to communicate about bad behavior and why it is wrong … hitting / spanking doesn’t do anything to teach a child more appropriate skills and valuable skills about communicating through challenges and disagreements and such …
They’re never too old. =)
I don’t think spanking a child is appropriate at any age.
i dunno
Probably 11 or 12
i’m surprised that people are saying up to 13… thinking back to when i was that age.. i think it would be very very odd to have recieved a spanking… spanking is for little kids who don’t know how to behave and don’t understand reasoning. if your child is 13 and doesn’t understand reasoning then maybe there are other problems that need to be addressed and not by spanking O_o.. i don’t have kids yet… i’m not sure if i’m for the spanking or not. i was spanked as a kid… not often… but it made me learn my lesson!
I’d say 12 ~ but not excessive…….after that you hope they are scared enough of you they make good decisions.
when he can feel it. peace max
At the age when they no longer live in your home.
until they are mature enough… probably between 6-10, the last time i got my ass whooped was when i was 13 though
I think a lot of people thought you were asking if spanking was right or wrong. I’m not going to say what I feel about that until you do. Assuming I did, or someone else who did asked me did, I would say it depends on the child. When they are old enough for other punishments to work, they don’t need to be spanked. Probably not past 9 or 10.
And thanks for commenting!
spanking is not right..its abuse…
I don’t support spanking either.
spanking is not abuse!
Lordy.. spanking is not abuse! beating someone is abuse. when the spaking theory came from dr spock… everyone listend and now look at our youth. Our kids are 11 and 13 and we do not spank anymore. The reason is.. is because taking thier xbox away teaches them more now. Before.. being spanked worked. Now they are getting older and it doesn’t do that much.
Christina
Whenever they can fight back. >.>
From reading your readers’ responses, I know why there are so many brats in the world.
6 or 7
That is assuming that one believes in spanking-I happen to think that positive parenting without spanking his a crock of **** Then again, I am the mother of (3) teenagers hindsight is always 20/20
RYC: I agree. I can’t imagine anyone putting themselves through that. I guess that is why very few decent, outstanding, and upstanding people are in government. Why put themselves through that inquisition?
When the kid is big enough to spank you? I don’t know, it just kind of faded out of the picture for me, although I really was never spanked often.
13
Dumb-Fucks: Spanking is Discipline not abuse.
hmmmm….good question. I don’t know i’m going to say 7 or 8 maybe. I don’t spank much now, but I do if it calls for it!
i think you you should post about spanking being right and wrong…
i say around six. i was spanked till i was about ten. i personally feel that’s the reason why i’m so diciplined/anti-social sometimes.
kuo
4
i was spanked until i was in my teenage years. i think the last time was like when i was around 15. after that grounding has a much deeper effect on the person than spanking would.
“I’d say it depends on the child and the maturity level of that child.”
I’d say it depends on the adult and the maturity level of that adult.
Ahhh they are never too old to spank! LOL I told my daughter last week that she better watch it and that she’s not too old for me to spank her. She is 12. Actually I don’t really think I could tho. I don’t spank her or my son anymore and he’s 7.
I don’t think children should ever be spanked. Physical harm/pain is not the way to teach a kid what not to do. I read somewhere a couple years ago that people who were spanked as kids are more prone to using violence to solve problems. I was spanked until probably 8 years old, I don’t really remember. And yes, I’m prone to violence when I’m upset. I had a kitten who would bite me all the time, so I swatted her butt every time she did it. She just got meaner and meaner. I will never do it again.
There are other forms of discipline besides spanking and other physical actions. I don’t agree with spanking at all.
theoretically we should never spank kids
I don’t believe in spanking.
when something that belongs to them or is their priviledge is more valuable in their possesion, not mine!
You can always use some kind of reinforcements to reduce behavior, rather than punishments. If they stop doing something, give them something good to eat or something. Don’t spoil them. Or, you can take away some privilege or item, and if they stop doing something bad, give it back.
Do you spank?
depends on what you mean by spank. and about the internet thing. maybe you should stop your children from using the internet too much because they’ll use in in excess and that’s something negative, but you shouldn’t ban them from it just becuase you don’t think they’re ready for it. and it’s not like if your children have xanga they’ll go wrong or something. you can’t leave them naive forever. it’s just something to think about. and this goes for all your posts, it just depends on your morals and values. but i really think you need to loosen up.
I guess middle school, but if they’re getting into a lot of trouble, then sure, why not in the high school, lol, but if you’ve done it from when they were little they should have learned by then. I guess I’ve come from one of those families where my mama was like ‘I don’t care what age you are…’lol.
8 or 9
Or maybe when they’re old enough to spank you back
“I don’t believe in spanking”
Okay. Don’t teach your kids that when they do something bad physical harm will be endured. See how big of a punk they grow up to be. Grounding? This proves you as weak to them. You ground them. They go play with their toys.
Take away their FAVORITE toy at the time, they’ll cry and hate you.
Physical pain-good
Other- Bad.
You all see them little punks in Wal*Mart that whine their asses off to get a toy or candy and they don’t shut the fuck up until they get it. Trying to explain to them won’t help. Buying said item will get them thinking “If I whine, I’ll get it”. Spank them. Do it. If you love them, you will do so.
When the child turns around to the parent after the spank and laughs in their face cause it doesn’t hurt anymore. Atleast that’s what happened with me and my younger brother. We were somewhere between the ages of 5 to 8… it’s been a long time.
NEVER muahhahahahahaha
You don’t spank kids, that’s freaking gross. I’d rather punch my future children than spank them.
YEAH I WAS COMMENT 69!! Hahahahaha
When they move out. lol jk
Probably 10 or so. Once they are old enough to leave the house to play with other kids down the street, you finally have the option of grounding them.
The child psychologist who taught our Childhood development class (who has three children of his own and is an AWESOME man) says children should be spanked between the ages of 2 and 6. Not before nor after. We also had to practice proper spanking technique on our arm which is you use your three main fingers (index, middle, ring) and firmly and quickly strike it across bare skin (our arms, it would be the kids butt) and do it no more than twice. Effective and unable to actually hurt the child, just sting.
umm…are you ever going to answer your own questions?
holy cow that was a quick reply.
Spanking is a way of letting the child know who is in charge and that you are not afraid to enforce the rules with force if necessary. I believe in spanking, not beating, in moderation. It should be used often enough for the child to believe it to be a possible consequence, but also not too often that the child gets used to it and doesn’t learn anything from it. Spanking doesn’t necessarily hurt, it just scares the child. Sometimes a good scare can go a long way for the child’s attitude. I was spanked as a child, and I love my parents completely, it did not hurt me. I was even belted once (not hard, but it was a scarier punishment). Very useful. I’d say you can spank a child for as long as you see fit and as long as it will do some good.
Troy
when they start spanking you back.
the moment they are born…
First of all, you don’t “spank” kids. It SHOULD be considered child abuse. Even if your child has done some bad things, talk things through. When they become older, they will be easily influenced by your actions and may become part of a gang. That’s what I think
**When the child turns around to the parent after the spank and laughs in their face cause it doesn’t hurt anymore. Atleast that’s what happened with me and my younger brother. We were somewhere between the ages of 5 to 8… it’s been a long time.**
In reply to that, i hope your dad can still beat your ass at 5 years old, if not, you are one tough kid
Oh yes, ps. Not letting your children use the internet is slightly weird. My sisters are 12 and 13 and need the internet for school.
you shouldn’t spank a child…there are other ways….
Hm….five.
The first time they laugh at you, it’s over.
What… Never… HAHAHA
12
well i guess here is a good example of why spanking can be a good way to teach your kids and a time when my parents did it to me.
when i was about 2 i started to run into the middle of the road when there was a car coming. i dont know much about little kids but i dont think a “dont do that you could get hurt!” was going to teach me not to run into the middle of the road.
For those of you who are abhorrant to physical punishment: you have never worked at a residential treatment center. I’m a pacifist and I would STILL use spanking. I smacked my mother when I was 8 years old. Her smacking me back sent the clear message that smacking your mother is a bad bad idea
10
Heck, spank until they’re 16-17, If you do it with a belt, and a really strong father, it not only hurts, but its embarrasing.
…not that i would know..
At age 12 or so. After that, I admit I was rather rebellious and was powerful enough to refuse a spanking and not be effected like before by physical punishment.
I love the people that say, “Never” or actually give an age.
Everyone who says it’s “Child Abuse” is wrong. Severe beating in the face, Arm, chest, back, legs, those kind of places, THAT’S child abuse. Antone who is spanked should consider themselves lucky.
Your Ass, It’s mostly fat. Therefore, You are not damaging the punished one’s behind.
I say teenage….age… But it depends on the kid and the family, of course. I recieved my last spanking as a 15 yr old (if memory serves me well…as it so often does NOT).
When they stop disobeying, or when they move out.
I’d like to say this: I was spanked as a child, and it has made me a more discliplined individual. I respect my parents and even THANK them for going ahead and helping me out a bit by spanking me.
If you just ‘talk’ to the child every single time, they begin to learn that they can get away with things without really recieving any kind of REAL punishment, and will just keep doing what they do, and possibly become spoiled.
Sure, if you HIT your child it’s a different story. You definitely should not do that.
For a spanking, I consider it just a firm hit on the bottom, not anywhere else, and definitely not enough to cause more than just a temporary pain that they won’t forget right away.
50
I have a 14 year old whos smart mouth got her a swat on the butt. For those of you who oppose it, my question is what do you do with a high school age child that is disrespectful and foul mouthed.
Psychologically speaking, most kids have developed formal and concrete operations by around seven, but it differs from child to child. Spanking after those developments will do more to hurt the child’s psyche than to help enforce better behaviour.
any age is a good age to spank…do anything to get ur point across…and that’s coming from a kid!!!!!!!!
I should also note that before then it is a matter of opinion. Remember that you are trying to develop a relationship of trust with your child, so a little explanation on your part can go a long way later when you have to ask your child to do something without an explanation.
If you do decide that spanking your child is the way you wish to punish (and it is the choice of every individual–it’s not as unhealthy as some may portray it, but nor is it the magic bullet of parenting), remember that there is one more important thing: always do what you say you’re going to do. Never threaten and then fail to go through with it unless it is something absurd or said in joking.
Children can’t understand more subtle forms of discipline like ‘talking it over’ until a later age. I was spanked, not excessively of course, and I turned out fine. I’m not a gang lord…
A lot of people don’t support spanking. I’m guessing it’s a generation gap thing and how our cultures change, like being more tolerant these days. I agree with that other guy. Spanking is discipline, not abuse.
“any age is a good age to spank…do anything to get ur point across…and that’s coming from a kid!” Spanking is a form of conditioning that “teaches” a child not to do something by attaching the memory of a physically discomforting sensation with a certain type of “bad” behaviour. It is positive punishment–the same thing you experience when your car beeps at you for not wearing your seat belt. It should be used in the same manner. Spanking in excess will cause the child to attach the memory of being spanked with you and s/he will learn to fear the punisher rather than the punishment.
“Children can’t understand more subtle forms of discipline like ‘talking it over’ until a later age. I was spanked, not excessively of course, and I turned out fine. I’m not a gang lord…” Not until they develop formal operations (which, as stated before, happens approximately at the age of seven)
I don’t particularly like children, so this is a tough one for me. I think the first time they do something wrong, it should be discussed with no physical punishment. After that, it’s ok to give them a few licks on the behind providing they do the same thing again. I believe, if I have children, I’m going to make them obey me, and live by my rules, or every freedom they have will be taken away rather than hitting them. I don’t believe in violence, so my wife will definately be administering any physical punishment. But look at me, I’ve gone on a rant, so as to an answer to your question, as long as they are disobeying rules, it’s ok to punish them physically, not abuse, but punishment.
I don’t believe in spanking.
“or every freedom they have will be taken away rather than hitting them” You might want to research authoritarian parenting versus authoritative. I’m not saying there’s anything wrong with this strategy, but it’s good to see different case studies that reveal what of this is too much of this. The same goes for anything, really. Spanking is a form of punishment and discipline, but if it is used in excess, it can be unhealthy or harmful to a child.
I would say four or five, any age past that would be completely innapropriate. I don’t support spanking at all, but when then come to an age where they can do mostly everything for themselves, a new dicipline method is in order.
As off topic as this may be, I really do agree with Kaiouss (above) in that threats are absolutely useless in punishing children. That was mainly what my parents used on me when I was smaller, and it was absolutely ineffective, because I knew I had more control over them they they did of me, and I quite honestly didn’t respect them. But then I’m not running around the streets doing drugs yet, so who knows…
I think in general it is wrong. But the occasional swat on the butt between the ages of say…3-6 to get the point across that somthing is dangerious is okay. Beyond that it is abuse…kids remember it…it is very innaproprate. It’s just not right…Speaking from experience of being abused I would say that if there is a way to avoid the physical punishment…DO IT!
When the spanking doesn’t work.
People should not hit other people for any reason.
Adults may SAY that they hit in love and not anger, but that is total bullshit and anyone who says it is a liar.
I find it remarkable that so many adults think it is okay to hit the children when they are tiny–under four???? Fuck!
They are just babies then.
I think parents should only hit their kids when their kids are big enough to hit them back. Let them see how THEY like it.
18. If they need it up until then, give it to them. (With a paddle, not with your hand- never associate your hand with hurting them) But, it usually loses its effectiveness long before then. Grounding or revocation of privilages is much more effective. The last time I remember getting spanked was probably around 10 years old… and I remember that I faked caring… it didnt really bother me by that age.
you should never hit a child.
I dunno, I think as a parent, when the right time comes you’ll know. I remember when it was ok for teachers to spank you without causing a huge media filled lawsuit, most parents actually encouraged this too. Now if a teacher so much as touches a child they could get sued to hell and back. Maybe this is why kids are the way they are these days. Do they still use spanking in schools? I’ll bet if they do it involves a huge contract parents have to sign, they didn’t have that when I was growing up either.
Sometimes I’d like to spank some of the little brats on here as a favor to their parents, and to the rest of the world.
When they become bigger than you? Actually I’d try to avoid spanking at all…
Spanking is never ok! it’s abuse
I think I’ve heard Dobson say (in a book) that the goal is never to humiliate them, so if they are old enough to be humiliated, they’re probably to old.
Bananna is 9, and I think she’s past the age of effective corporal punishment (as a regular thing). However, a few months back, she was exhausted and emotionally over-wrought about something and got very sassy, and I spanked her. She was being blatantly disrespectful, which is pretty out of character for her. Anyway, again I’m gonna harp on the “depends on the kid” line. She REALLY doesn’t like physical discomfort of any kind. Rare spankings were always more effective for her than for her brother, who just gets incredibly angry. . .and ends up having to be isolated anyway.
But to respond directly to the question, I think 2 to 4 or 5yrs old is probably the most effective window for spankings.
Oops, I mean *too* old.
spanking doesnt work.
There are more effective means of discipline. Spanking is becoming stone aged.
People are comparing spanking to beating here. Spanking should never be done in anger and only used on important issues. Grabbing an extra cookie or yelling in the grocery store is NOT important. But teaching a child not to run out in the street after they’ve refused to listen is important. You could be saving their life. Spanking done with frequency loses it’s effect. I was spanked only a few times and I remember them. I wasn’t beaten. That is totally different.
VAMPYRICARCHDEMON666 said it very well on all her responses. start spanking as soon as they need it and stop when the dont need it anymore. its good for em! people who think its abuse are delusional. abuse is making them bleed, bruise or scar. a pop on the tail is good for em! i got it with a switch when i was little…and a belt…or anything handy…shoe, spoon…you name it. give me a break, ive got some of the best kids around and theyve been spanked! i just bet those little disrespectful kids with diarrhea of the mouth have parents who think spanking is ‘horrible’ and try and calmly discuss how they shouldnt be like that, all the while the kid flips em the bird and tells em to shut the sh!t up and mind their own business. hmmm..
Spanking, kicking, electric shocking. Torture is good for all ages! Ask Cheney..
Whe he/she is bigger or stronger than you.
To those saying that “taking it over” doesn’t work with young kids… I’ve only been working in my classroom for half a year, but already I’ve witnessed pretty dang good success with my 3 yr olds using the “talk it over” strategy of discipline. I don’t think we give kids enough credit for how much they can really understand.
It depends on the child, but my parents stopped spanking me when I was around 10, and I think that’s pretty reasonable.
I think that a child should only be spanked between the ages of 5 and 9. Once they’re ten, then they’re too old, and before they’re 5, they cant completely understand what they’re being spanked for.
I will NEVER spank my children. Discipline through violence is the exact opposite of my philosophy..
13
When they start laughing at you when you spank them
the day they are born
i dont think my parents think im too old yet.. and im 20
Any kid is too old to spank
it depends on the child.. and the spanking..
I was spanked until I was 16, then I moved to FL and got married.. solved that problem.. When your child gets to the rebellious age, they don’t want to take it anymore.. at least I didn’t and I just left
NOTE: our schools still allow paddling.. though on rare occassions
*There are more effective means of discipline. Spanking is becoming stone aged.*
This makes me laugh…. hahaha….. oh people
I think when they are old enough to understand what you are saying to them, then there is no need to get their attention by spanking them.
Erika
Blah blah blah… no spanking? Crazies. Those no spanking parents are the ones that we see in Target throwing themselves on the floor wailing, while their parental figure stands there in a soothing voice saying, “Come on, Johnny, lets control ourselves now. Tell mommy why you are upset?”
I acted proper in public NOT because I knew how to act… I acted proper because I knew if I didn’t, I was going to get it!! I dont’ believe in abuse at all, beatings and such, but if the kid needs a good swat across the bottom, then they should get it…. they are too old for it when they don’t need it anymore, or when you can’t catch them anymore!!! lol.
I think around 10 or 11.
till it doesnt hurt anymore
i wouldnt really support spanking.. but.. if i had to.. i guess.. until they got bigger than me.. or until the point i thought they were mature enough to listen and follow directions
I’m still not sure if I shoud spank my kids… Do you have kids? And do you spank them?
I misspelled “should”, maybe I shoud, shood, snood, ah go to bed.
When they move out of your house. A whooping with a belt did WONDERS for me
4
As with many other things, I think the age depends more on the child. When you know that it will no longer be effective with this particular child, is when that child is too old and another form of discipline should be used.
When they quit needing it… and before age 18.
I dont think you should at all…its not biblical…
Well, kids don’t like to be spanked. But some adults do. The Pork finds that quite amusing.
they should never be spanked
Hmm..I’d have to agree with EvanBittle. It’s probably best in my opinion to stop spanking in the preteens and move on to grounding, etc. Once I threw a hard chew toy and hit my mom…the belting I received was totally effective. However, there was one case where she got carried away and gave me a large bruise. I think that was a little too much. (I am a hemophiliac) In the teen years I think removing access to computers, ipods, cars, etc. is a good way to keep teens from becoming spoiled brats.
I find it ridiculous that children ought to be spanked. If a parent is intent upon using force discpline their children, nothing beats a firm backhand; spanking is simply ridiculous, demeaning, and humiliating.
NEVER! I’m sure my parents would still beat the crap out of me if I got TOO out of line…
probably never… i probably still need a good one sometimes although it’s been a few years
At the age when they are able to understand and discuss why they did what they did and why they shouldn’t have.
When the spanking lost its intended effect of discipline.
5 years old
I’d say 10 or 11 becuase I remember I was spanked up until then and it was so……uncomfortable because I was “developed” and I just felt so weird having my bare bum exposed to my dad…
when they can curse at you and then OUT RUN YOU.
While I don’t see spanking as abuse (since there are no lasting negative effects) I don’t see it as a terribly effective form of correction. Studies have proven that positive reinforcement (pat on the back, etc.) is much more effective than negative reinforcement (spanking). So if you reward kids for doing right and keep your temper and reason with them when they do wrong, they will be better off for it.
That’s not to say that spanking doesn’t have it’s place though. If reasoning with a child doesn’t work, spanking can be a good way of getting their attention, but should not be done in anger and must be followed with an explanation as to why they just got spanked and how they can avoid it in the future. But it’s probably easier said than done.
you should NEVER spank a child. it just teaches them that physical punishment is okay, and you don’t want to be sending your kid a message of violence.
I am thankful for the fact that my parents spanked me!!
I probably would not have learned some of the lessons of life.
An adult that does not discipline their child in love does not love their child.
Brent Carl Whitaker
Their is no set age, when your child listens to your voice instead of just your swat on the rear-end, then you are ready to wean him/her off of it.
But do not be afraid to bring it back to him/her if they decide to go back to their foolishness.
Brent Carl Whitaker
When they get to be old enough to prevent a parent from doing it.
Then if they can’t follow the rules of the head of the household, they are thrown out so that they can rule their own household and behave their own way.
If they get into their teens and still require spanking, then psychiatric therapy should be considered for both parents and teen because something has gone terribly wrong.
L,r
I think used appropriately spanking can be very affective, although in certain personalities it doesn’t work….but I’d say….if used appropriately, it shouldn’t be needed after 7 or 8.
8
first?
dah way off
when other means of punishment become jst as effective
12
5. my rents did it to me until i was 12.
B F Skinner suggested that punishments DO NOT work well as the rewards.
20
I spanked a 20 year old when the behavior was extremely dangerous. I was afraid for their life. It was effective, BTW. Generally early teens is a time it naturally ends.
never. because soon enough they will learn what child abuse is.
whoa, i meant you should never spank, not that they’re never too old
AZN’S 4 LIFE
I LUV AZN’S AND BULIMICS
I’M SAAAAAD
By the time a kid is one I believe you have the right to punch him/her in the stomach or throat.
Well….Legally you can spank your child unless you leave a mark. It really depends on the adults parenting style. But keep in mind you can easily get in trouble for spanking your children. Its really up to you. You shouldnt be asking anyone else.
~Shay
i think that a smack on the butt is sometimes the only way TO communicate with a toddler. they dont understand reason or logic. as long as it is not inappropriate, and as long as it is done for disciplinary purposes not out of rage, there is nothing wrong with spanking a child. and i dont think that there is a certain age when it should be stopped… maybe the punishment should be changed a bit… for example, i am almost 19 years old, and if i talked back to my mom she would not hesitate to give me a slap across the face… i dont think thats innappropriate at all, i think its parenting.
i just stumbled on to this site and came accross this question. i think probly around 15. and too all those people out there who think spanking is abuse, it is not. And even if u think it is it works effectively and accordingly. i was spanked until about 15 years old and i am not prone to violence i get A’s in all my classes (senior) and I love my parents very much just for spanking me. I was a brat and there was no other way i could have learned.
My cousins never got spanked. ever. their mom thought it was wrong and that reasoning would work. boy did that bomb. they are extremely annoying little brats that care only for themselves and the two are teenagers. I think it is thanks to these retards that will never spank there kids that we have these gay law suits over the stupidest things.
People dont teach the Bible in schools anymore and they dont spank their kids. back when they did you would never hear of a school shooting or anything even close. now it seems like it is a daily event. I blame that on parents and lack of morals (what parents are supposed to teach).
I’d say about four. they’re old enough to realize something they don’t like happens when they do something bad. just as long as you as the parent lets them know you still love them, and as long as it’s only a swat and nothing even close to “beating.” and it should stop at 6 or 7 – after awhile it gets embarrassing and you lose a little of their respect.
I am aginst spanking. and the spanking of a babies hand is the worst. they say it is just to protect them from shit like sticking their finger in a light socket, but you’re not reaslly teaching your kid anything by doing that except that you’ll hit them if they do it again. At an age where they are to young to understand why not to do certain things you should just keep a better eye on them until it can be explained to them. Or just buy some fuckin outlet gaurds or whatever you call those little plastic things you stick in the outlet. Stop the promoyion of violence to children. even at a very early age children are starting to learn that violence is ok because of corpral punishment. Learn to teach instead of beat! But what the hell do I know?
i would say not to spank them at all, violence breeds violence
How many of your responders have kids? I raised 7. The age to quit depends on the child. We never spanked ours often, but did more when they were preschoolers than later. I used a small wooden board. When they were older, all I had to do was go get the board or threaten to, and they’d behave.
I hope I’ll never smack a child. I think it gives contradictory messages…
“Violence is wrong little Jimmy” Whack! …”How dare you be disrespectful to me” Wallop! “You are being totally unreasonable! Obey me because I’m bigger and stronger than you” Bam!
My Mum used to rule by force and we never respected her for it. We just became resentful and perhaps even naughtier because she used violence rather than reason.
Respect is earnt, not demanded. Small children have to learn who’s boss for their own good I understand but surely there’s a better way.
I admit I’m not a mother.
hmmmm….I’d say seven or eight…and to be used sparingly up until that age. I don’t think you should spank ALL the time, there has to be other ways also.
Never
it depends on how you spank becuse some people hwen they spank they really actually hit, harder than they mean to. i think a stare to bore through the eyeballs is enough, that can be pretty scary ; ^ /
when****
I am a “victim” of spanking, and it most absolutely positively works, when done in a loving manner, the child might not get that at first, but if a parent explains to them that they love them and they’re spanking them to show them what’s wrong (lying, disobedience, etc.) then that’ll work, if a parent is not telling them that or just beating them for the “entertainment” of it, then that’s sick and abuse. I think spanking should be incorporated until it is no longer effective, so like, say after two or three spankings the kid goes back and does the bad thing again, it’s time to find a new mode of dicsipline, for ex. grounding, confiscating a toy or computer game, nintendo, etc. Everyone has something that they can’t stand to lose, or can’t stand to have (money and pain for example), for a 16 year old with their license on a weekend it can be devastating to take away their keys, unless they’re a game nerd (nerds are cool btw), in which case you ground them from the game/game machine for x amount of time, pain… any pain inflicted must be very temporary and strictly non-injuring (a red mark that last an hour doesn’t count, a black n blue bruise that lasts several hours or days does count), this can limit the effectiveness of it, but again, there are other negative incentives to give a child when they do something wrong, and positive incentives to encourage them to do stuff right.
Comments (190)
First?
Holy cow!!!!!!!
I’d say four.
THIRD! >.<m/
Eighteen. Because then, it would be sexual harassment. :3
I say….
till about 4th year of age ^_^ no need for anymore after that.
But then again, is there really an age?
I know my parents sometimes spanked me, but that was when I was too little to listen. I think if a kid will behave without being spanked, they are too old.
Definitely not past age 7 or 8.
7or 8
middle school. 5th-6th gradeish. at whatever point you notice that they are physically maturing.
as soon as s/he leaves the womb. i don’t think spanking is okay.
I don’t personally support spanking at all, let alone past pre-school, but that is when I think it is no longer appropriate at all. just to clarify.
Well, that’s a tough one to answers since I don’t particularly support spanking. I don’t oppose it…I just don’t support it. So for all you people that spank your kids, I’m gonna have to go with…5.
But then it’s gonna be awhile till I have kids, so I haven’t really given the subject much consideration. Actually any…
12
They’re always too old to spank. It’s not right to spank a child – it’s abuse./
Thanks for commenting me!
I don’t believe in spanking.
I don’t support it at all, but I would think 4-5 would be the outside limit. It’s just icky after that.
Teenager. I do believe in spanking. Not beating. Not abuse. Just old-fashion spanking on the butt. Spare the rod…spoil the child. Lots of spoiled kids around nowadays.
since when is any child young enough to spank?
these people are crazy.. i’d say like 13 or 14… even then, if he/she acts up, there ain’t nothing wrong with a lil belting! why is it wrong to spank? doesn’t even the bible say “spare the rod and spoil the child”?
i would never spank but i think its risky beyond 4 years old.
I don’t think spanking really works.
I’d say it depends on the child and the maturity level of that child. Generally though, probably not past 6. Spanking, if done correctly, is certainly not abuse. Random, sudden, and/or overly harsh hitting and striking is abuse, not a quick smack on the butt, that’s only discipline.
-Jared
never be too old!
spanking is not the way to treat a kids, i think. a child doesn’t need physical punishment to be taught the right things.
the question assumes that spanking is a good thing … if and when i have children, there will never be an appropriate age to spank them … i don’t think toddlers fully understand why some adult is beating up on them, and once a child is past the toddler stage they are old enough to be reasoned with … to talk things through … to communicate about bad behavior and why it is wrong … hitting / spanking doesn’t do anything to teach a child more appropriate skills and valuable skills about communicating through challenges and disagreements and such …
They’re never too old. =)
I don’t think spanking a child is appropriate at any age.
i dunno
Probably 11 or 12
i’m surprised that people are saying up to 13… thinking back to when i was that age.. i think it would be very very odd to have recieved a spanking… spanking is for little kids who don’t know how to behave and don’t understand reasoning. if your child is 13 and doesn’t understand reasoning then maybe there are other problems that need to be addressed and not by spanking O_o.. i don’t have kids yet… i’m not sure if i’m for the spanking or not. i was spanked as a kid… not often… but it made me learn my lesson!
I’d say 12 ~ but not excessive…….after that you hope they are scared enough of you they make good decisions.
when he can feel it.
peace max
At the age when they no longer live in your home.
until they are mature enough… probably between 6-10, the last time i got my ass whooped was when i was 13 though
I think a lot of people thought you were asking if spanking was right or wrong. I’m not going to say what I feel about that until you do. Assuming I did, or someone else who did asked me did, I would say it depends on the child. When they are old enough for other punishments to work, they don’t need to be spanked. Probably not past 9 or 10.
And thanks for commenting!
spanking is not right..its abuse…
I don’t support spanking either.
spanking is not abuse!
Lordy.. spanking is not abuse! beating someone is abuse. when the spaking theory came from dr spock… everyone listend and now look at our youth. Our kids are 11 and 13 and we do not spank anymore. The reason is.. is because taking thier xbox away teaches them more now. Before.. being spanked worked. Now they are getting older and it doesn’t do that much.
Christina
Whenever they can fight back. >.>
From reading your readers’ responses, I know why there are so many brats in the world.
6 or 7
That is assuming that one believes in spanking-I happen to think that positive parenting without spanking his a crock of **** Then again, I am the mother of (3) teenagers
hindsight is always 20/20 
RYC: I agree. I can’t imagine anyone putting themselves through that. I guess that is why very few decent, outstanding, and upstanding people are in government. Why put themselves through that inquisition?
When the kid is big enough to spank you? I don’t know, it just kind of faded out of the picture for me, although I really was never spanked often.
13
Dumb-Fucks: Spanking is Discipline not abuse.
hmmmm….good question. I don’t know i’m going to say 7 or 8 maybe. I don’t spank much now, but I do if it calls for it!
i think you you should post about spanking being right and wrong…
i say around six.
i was spanked till i was about ten.
i personally feel that’s the reason why i’m so diciplined/anti-social sometimes.
kuo
4
i was spanked until i was in my teenage years. i think the last time was like when i was around 15. after that grounding has a much deeper effect on the person than spanking would.
“I’d say it depends on the child and the maturity level of that child.”
I’d say it depends on the adult and the maturity level of that adult.
Ahhh they are never too old to spank! LOL I told my daughter last week that she better watch it and that she’s not too old for me to spank her. She is 12. Actually I don’t really think I could tho. I don’t spank her or my son anymore and he’s 7.
I don’t think children should ever be spanked. Physical harm/pain is not the way to teach a kid what not to do. I read somewhere a couple years ago that people who were spanked as kids are more prone to using violence to solve problems. I was spanked until probably 8 years old, I don’t really remember. And yes, I’m prone to violence when I’m upset. I had a kitten who would bite me all the time, so I swatted her butt every time she did it. She just got meaner and meaner. I will never do it again.
There are other forms of discipline besides spanking and other physical actions. I don’t agree with spanking at all.
theoretically we should never spank kids
I don’t believe in spanking.
when something that belongs to them or is their priviledge is more valuable in their possesion, not mine!
You can always use some kind of reinforcements to reduce behavior, rather than punishments. If they stop doing something, give them something good to eat or something. Don’t spoil them. Or, you can take away some privilege or item, and if they stop doing something bad, give it back.
Do you spank?
depends on what you mean by spank. and about the internet thing. maybe you should stop your children from using the internet too much because they’ll use in in excess and that’s something negative, but you shouldn’t ban them from it just becuase you don’t think they’re ready for it. and it’s not like if your children have xanga they’ll go wrong or something. you can’t leave them naive forever. it’s just something to think about. and this goes for all your posts, it just depends on your morals and values. but i really think you need to loosen up.
I guess middle school, but if they’re getting into a lot of trouble, then sure, why not in the high school, lol, but if you’ve done it from when they were little they should have learned by then. I guess I’ve come from one of those families where my mama was like ‘I don’t care what age you are…’lol.
8 or 9
Or maybe when they’re old enough to spank you back
“I don’t believe in spanking”
Okay. Don’t teach your kids that when they do something bad physical harm will be endured. See how big of a punk they grow up to be. Grounding? This proves you as weak to them. You ground them. They go play with their toys.
Take away their FAVORITE toy at the time, they’ll cry and hate you.
Physical pain-good
Other- Bad.
You all see them little punks in Wal*Mart that whine their asses off to get a toy or candy and they don’t shut the fuck up until they get it. Trying to explain to them won’t help. Buying said item will get them thinking “If I whine, I’ll get it”. Spank them. Do it. If you love them, you will do so.
When the child turns around to the parent after the spank and laughs in their face cause it doesn’t hurt anymore. Atleast that’s what happened with me and my younger brother. We were somewhere between the ages of 5 to 8… it’s been a long time.
NEVER muahhahahahahaha
You don’t spank kids, that’s freaking gross. I’d rather punch my future children than spank them.
YEAH I WAS COMMENT 69!! Hahahahaha
When they move out. lol jk
Probably 10 or so. Once they are old enough to leave the house to play with other kids down the street, you finally have the option of grounding them.
The child psychologist who taught our Childhood development class (who has three children of his own and is an AWESOME man) says children should be spanked between the ages of 2 and 6. Not before nor after. We also had to practice proper spanking technique on our arm which is you use your three main fingers (index, middle, ring) and firmly and quickly strike it across bare skin (our arms, it would be the kids butt) and do it no more than twice. Effective and unable to actually hurt the child, just sting.
umm…are you ever going to answer your own questions?
holy cow that was a quick reply.
Spanking is a way of letting the child know who is in charge and that you are not afraid to enforce the rules with force if necessary. I believe in spanking, not beating, in moderation. It should be used often enough for the child to believe it to be a possible consequence, but also not too often that the child gets used to it and doesn’t learn anything from it. Spanking doesn’t necessarily hurt, it just scares the child. Sometimes a good scare can go a long way for the child’s attitude. I was spanked as a child, and I love my parents completely, it did not hurt me. I was even belted once (not hard, but it was a scarier punishment). Very useful. I’d say you can spank a child for as long as you see fit and as long as it will do some good.
Troy
when they start spanking you back.
the moment they are born…
First of all, you don’t “spank” kids.
It SHOULD be considered child abuse.
Even if your child has done some bad things,
talk things through. When they become older, they
will be easily influenced by your actions and
may become part of a gang. That’s what I think
**When the child turns around to the parent after the spank and laughs in their face cause it doesn’t hurt anymore. Atleast that’s what happened with me and my younger brother. We were somewhere between the ages of 5 to 8… it’s been a long time.**
In reply to that, i hope your dad can still beat your ass at 5 years old, if not, you are one tough kid
Oh yes, ps. Not letting your children use the internet is slightly weird. My sisters are 12 and 13 and need the internet for school.
you shouldn’t spank a child…there are other ways….
Hm….five.
The first time they laugh at you, it’s over.
What… Never… HAHAHA
12
well i guess here is a good example of why spanking can be a good way to teach your kids and a time when my parents did it to me.
when i was about 2 i started to run into the middle of the road when there was a car coming. i dont know much about little kids but i dont think a “dont do that you could get hurt!” was going to teach me not to run into the middle of the road.
For those of you who are abhorrant to physical punishment: you have never worked at a residential treatment center. I’m a pacifist and I would STILL use spanking. I smacked my mother when I was 8 years old. Her smacking me back sent the clear message that smacking your mother is a bad bad idea
10
Heck, spank until they’re 16-17, If you do it with a belt, and a really strong father, it not only hurts, but its embarrasing.
…not that i would know..
At age 12 or so. After that, I admit I was rather rebellious and was powerful enough to refuse a spanking and not be effected like before by physical punishment.
I love the people that say, “Never” or actually give an age.
Everyone who says it’s “Child Abuse” is wrong. Severe beating in the face, Arm, chest, back, legs, those kind of places, THAT’S child abuse. Antone who is spanked should consider themselves lucky.
Your Ass, It’s mostly fat. Therefore, You are not damaging the punished one’s behind.
I say teenage….age… But it depends on the kid and the family, of course. I recieved my last spanking as a 15 yr old (if memory serves me well…as it so often does NOT).
When they stop disobeying, or when they move out.
I’d like to say this: I was spanked as a child, and it has made me a more discliplined individual. I respect my parents and even THANK them for going ahead and helping me out a bit by spanking me.
If you just ‘talk’ to the child every single time, they begin to learn that they can get away with things without really recieving any kind of REAL punishment, and will just keep doing what they do, and possibly become spoiled.
Sure, if you HIT your child it’s a different story. You definitely should not do that.
For a spanking, I consider it just a firm hit on the bottom, not anywhere else, and definitely not enough to cause more than just a temporary pain that they won’t forget right away.
50
I have a 14 year old whos smart mouth got her a swat on the butt. For those of you who oppose it, my question is what do you do with a high school age child that is disrespectful and foul mouthed.
Psychologically speaking, most kids have developed formal and concrete operations by around seven, but it differs from child to child. Spanking after those developments will do more to hurt the child’s psyche than to help enforce better behaviour.
any age is a good age to spank…do anything to get ur point across…and that’s coming from a kid!!!!!!!!
I should also note that before then it is a matter of opinion. Remember that you are trying to develop a relationship of trust with your child, so a little explanation on your part can go a long way later when you have to ask your child to do something without an explanation.
If you do decide that spanking your child is the way you wish to punish (and it is the choice of every individual–it’s not as unhealthy as some may portray it, but nor is it the magic bullet of parenting), remember that there is one more important thing: always do what you say you’re going to do. Never threaten and then fail to go through with it unless it is something absurd or said in joking.
Children can’t understand more subtle forms of discipline like ‘talking it over’ until a later age. I was spanked, not excessively of course, and I turned out fine. I’m not a gang lord…
A lot of people don’t support spanking. I’m guessing it’s a generation gap thing and how our cultures change, like being more tolerant these days. I agree with that other guy. Spanking is discipline, not abuse.
“any age is a good age to spank…do anything to get ur point across…and that’s coming from a kid!”
Spanking is a form of conditioning that “teaches” a child not to do something by attaching the memory of a physically discomforting sensation with a certain type of “bad” behaviour. It is positive punishment–the same thing you experience when your car beeps at you for not wearing your seat belt. It should be used in the same manner. Spanking in excess will cause the child to attach the memory of being spanked with you and s/he will learn to fear the punisher rather than the punishment.
“Children can’t understand more subtle forms of discipline like ‘talking it over’ until a later age. I was spanked, not excessively of course, and I turned out fine. I’m not a gang lord…”
Not until they develop formal operations (which, as stated before, happens approximately at the age of seven)
I don’t particularly like children, so this is a tough one for me. I think the first time they do something wrong, it should be discussed with no physical punishment. After that, it’s ok to give them a few licks on the behind providing they do the same thing again. I believe, if I have children, I’m going to make them obey me, and live by my rules, or every freedom they have will be taken away rather than hitting them. I don’t believe in violence, so my wife will definately be administering any physical punishment. But look at me, I’ve gone on a rant, so as to an answer to your question, as long as they are disobeying rules, it’s ok to punish them physically, not abuse, but punishment.
I don’t believe in spanking.
“or every freedom they have will be taken away rather than hitting them”
You might want to research authoritarian parenting versus authoritative. I’m not saying there’s anything wrong with this strategy, but it’s good to see different case studies that reveal what of this is too much of this. The same goes for anything, really. Spanking is a form of punishment and discipline, but if it is used in excess, it can be unhealthy or harmful to a child.
I would say four or five, any age past that would be completely innapropriate. I don’t support spanking at all, but when then come to an age where they can do mostly everything for themselves, a new dicipline method is in order.
As off topic as this may be, I really do agree with Kaiouss (above) in that threats are absolutely useless in punishing children. That was mainly what my parents used on me when I was smaller, and it was absolutely ineffective, because I knew I had more control over them they they did of me, and I quite honestly didn’t respect them. But then I’m not running around the streets doing drugs yet, so who knows…
I think in general it is wrong. But the occasional swat on the butt between the ages of say…3-6 to get the point across that somthing is dangerious is okay. Beyond that it is abuse…kids remember it…it is very innaproprate. It’s just not right…Speaking from experience of being abused I would say that if there is a way to avoid the physical punishment…DO IT!
When the spanking doesn’t work.
People should not hit other people for any reason.
Adults may SAY that they hit in love and not anger, but that is total bullshit and anyone who says it is a liar.
I find it remarkable that so many adults think it is okay to hit the children when they are tiny–under four???? Fuck!
They are just babies then.
I think parents should only hit their kids when their kids are big enough to hit them back. Let them see how THEY like it.
18. If they need it up until then, give it to them. (With a paddle, not with your hand- never associate your hand with hurting them) But, it usually loses its effectiveness long before then. Grounding or revocation of privilages is much more effective. The last time I remember getting spanked was probably around 10 years old… and I remember that I faked caring… it didnt really bother me by that age.
you should never hit a child.
I dunno, I think as a parent, when the right time comes you’ll know. I remember when it was ok for teachers to spank you without causing a huge media filled lawsuit, most parents actually encouraged this too. Now if a teacher so much as touches a child they could get sued to hell and back. Maybe this is why kids are the way they are these days. Do they still use spanking in schools? I’ll bet if they do it involves a huge contract parents have to sign, they didn’t have that when I was growing up either.
Sometimes I’d like to spank some of the little brats on here as a favor to their parents, and to the rest of the world.
When they become bigger than you?
Actually I’d try to avoid spanking at all…
Spanking is never ok! it’s abuse
I think I’ve heard Dobson say (in a book) that the goal is never to humiliate them, so if they are old enough to be humiliated, they’re probably to old.
Bananna is 9, and I think she’s past the age of effective corporal punishment (as a regular thing). However, a few months back, she was exhausted and emotionally over-wrought about something and got very sassy, and I spanked her. She was being blatantly disrespectful, which is pretty out of character for her. Anyway, again I’m gonna harp on the “depends on the kid” line. She REALLY doesn’t like physical discomfort of any kind. Rare spankings were always more effective for her than for her brother, who just gets incredibly angry. . .and ends up having to be isolated anyway.
But to respond directly to the question, I think 2 to 4 or 5yrs old is probably the most effective window for spankings.
Oops, I mean *too* old.
spanking doesnt work.
There are more effective means of discipline. Spanking is becoming stone aged.
People are comparing spanking to beating here. Spanking should never be done in anger and only used on important issues. Grabbing an extra cookie or yelling in the grocery store is NOT important. But teaching a child not to run out in the street after they’ve refused to listen is important. You could be saving their life. Spanking done with frequency loses it’s effect. I was spanked only a few times and I remember them. I wasn’t beaten. That is totally different.
VAMPYRICARCHDEMON666 said it very well on all her responses. start spanking as soon as they need it and stop when the dont need it anymore. its good for em! people who think its abuse are delusional. abuse is making them bleed, bruise or scar. a pop on the tail is good for em! i got it with a switch when i was little…and a belt…or anything handy…shoe, spoon…you name it. give me a break, ive got some of the best kids around and theyve been spanked! i just bet those little disrespectful kids with diarrhea of the mouth have parents who think spanking is ‘horrible’ and try and calmly discuss how they shouldnt be like that, all the while the kid flips em the bird and tells em to shut the sh!t up and mind their own business. hmmm..
Spanking, kicking, electric shocking. Torture is good for all ages! Ask Cheney..
Whe he/she is bigger or stronger than you.
To those saying that “taking it over” doesn’t work with young kids… I’ve only been working in my classroom for half a year, but already I’ve witnessed pretty dang good success with my 3 yr olds using the “talk it over” strategy of discipline. I don’t think we give kids enough credit for how much they can really understand.
It depends on the child, but my parents stopped spanking me when I was around 10, and I think that’s pretty reasonable.
I think that a child should only be spanked between the ages of 5 and 9. Once they’re ten, then they’re too old, and before they’re 5, they cant completely understand what they’re being spanked for.
I will NEVER spank my children.
Discipline through violence is the exact opposite of my philosophy..
13
When they start laughing at you when you spank them
the day they are born
i dont think my parents think im too old yet.. and im 20
Any kid is too old to spank
it depends on the child.. and the spanking..
I was spanked until I was 16, then I moved to FL and got married.. solved that problem.. When your child gets to the rebellious age, they don’t want to take it anymore.. at least I didn’t and I just left
NOTE: our schools still allow paddling.. though on rare occassions
*There are more effective means of discipline. Spanking is becoming stone aged.*
This makes me laugh…. hahaha….. oh people
I think when they are old enough to understand what you are saying to them, then there is no need to get their attention by spanking them.
Erika
Blah blah blah… no spanking? Crazies. Those no spanking parents are the ones that we see in Target throwing themselves on the floor wailing, while their parental figure stands there in a soothing voice saying, “Come on, Johnny, lets control ourselves now. Tell mommy why you are upset?”
I acted proper in public NOT because I knew how to act… I acted proper because I knew if I didn’t, I was going to get it!! I dont’ believe in abuse at all, beatings and such, but if the kid needs a good swat across the bottom, then they should get it…. they are too old for it when they don’t need it anymore, or when you can’t catch them anymore!!! lol.
I think around 10 or 11.
till it doesnt hurt anymore
i wouldnt really support spanking.. but.. if i had to.. i guess.. until they got bigger than me.. or until the point i thought they were mature enough to listen and follow directions
I’m still not sure if I shoud spank my kids… Do you have kids? And do you spank them?
I misspelled “should”, maybe I shoud, shood, snood, ah go to bed.
When they move out of your house. A whooping with a belt did WONDERS for me
4
As with many other things, I think the age depends more on the child. When you know that it will no longer be effective with this particular child, is when that child is too old and another form of discipline should be used.
When they quit needing it… and before age 18.
I dont think you should at all…its not biblical…
Well, kids don’t like to be spanked. But some adults do. The Pork finds that quite amusing.
they should never be spanked
Hmm..I’d have to agree with EvanBittle. It’s probably best in my opinion to stop spanking in the preteens and move on to grounding, etc. Once I threw a hard chew toy and hit my mom…the belting I received was totally effective. However, there was one case where she got carried away and gave me a large bruise. I think that was a little too much. (I am a hemophiliac) In the teen years I think removing access to computers, ipods, cars, etc. is a good way to keep teens from becoming spoiled brats.
I find it ridiculous that children ought to be spanked. If a parent is intent upon using force discpline their children, nothing beats a firm backhand; spanking is simply ridiculous, demeaning, and humiliating.
NEVER! I’m sure my parents would still beat the crap out of me if I got TOO out of line…
probably never… i probably still need a good one sometimes although it’s been a few years
At the age when they are able to understand and discuss why they did what they did and why they shouldn’t have.
When the spanking lost its intended effect of discipline.
5 years old
I’d say 10 or 11 becuase I remember I was spanked up until then and it was so……uncomfortable because I was “developed” and I just felt so weird having my bare bum exposed to my dad…
when they can curse at you and then OUT RUN YOU.
While I don’t see spanking as abuse (since there are no lasting negative effects) I don’t see it as a terribly effective form of correction. Studies have proven that positive reinforcement (pat on the back, etc.) is much more effective than negative reinforcement (spanking). So if you reward kids for doing right and keep your temper and reason with them when they do wrong, they will be better off for it.
That’s not to say that spanking doesn’t have it’s place though. If reasoning with a child doesn’t work, spanking can be a good way of getting their attention, but should not be done in anger and must be followed with an explanation as to why they just got spanked and how they can avoid it in the future. But it’s probably easier said than done.
you should NEVER spank a child. it just teaches them that physical punishment is okay, and you don’t want to be sending your kid a message of violence.
I am thankful for the fact that my parents spanked me!!
I probably would not have learned some of the lessons of life.
An adult that does not discipline their child in love does not love their child.
Brent Carl Whitaker
Their is no set age, when your child listens to your voice instead of just your swat on the rear-end, then you are ready to wean him/her off of it.
But do not be afraid to bring it back to him/her if they decide to go back to their foolishness.
Brent Carl Whitaker
When they get to be old enough to prevent a parent from doing it.
Then if they can’t follow the rules of the head of the household, they are thrown out so that they can rule their own household and behave their own way.
If they get into their teens and still require spanking, then psychiatric therapy should be considered for both parents and teen because something has gone terribly wrong.
L,r
I think used appropriately spanking can be very affective, although in certain personalities it doesn’t work….but I’d say….if used appropriately, it shouldn’t be needed after 7 or 8.
8
first?
dah way off
when other means of punishment become jst as effective
12
5. my rents did it to me until i was 12.
B F Skinner suggested that punishments DO NOT work well as the rewards.
20
I spanked a 20 year old when the behavior was extremely dangerous. I was afraid for their life. It was effective, BTW. Generally early teens is a time it naturally ends.
never. because soon enough they will learn what child abuse is.
whoa, i meant you should never spank, not that they’re never too old
AZN’S 4 LIFE
I LUV AZN’S AND BULIMICS
I’M SAAAAAD
By the time a kid is one I believe you have the right to punch him/her in the stomach or throat.
Well….Legally you can spank your child unless you leave a mark. It really depends on the adults parenting style. But keep in mind you can easily get in trouble for spanking your children. Its really up to you. You shouldnt be asking anyone else.
~Shay
i think that a smack on the butt is sometimes the only way TO communicate with a toddler. they dont understand reason or logic. as long as it is not inappropriate, and as long as it is done for disciplinary purposes not out of rage, there is nothing wrong with spanking a child. and i dont think that there is a certain age when it should be stopped… maybe the punishment should be changed a bit… for example, i am almost 19 years old, and if i talked back to my mom she would not hesitate to give me a slap across the face… i dont think thats innappropriate at all, i think its parenting.
i just stumbled on to this site and came accross this question. i think probly around 15. and too all those people out there who think spanking is abuse, it is not. And even if u think it is it works effectively and accordingly. i was spanked until about 15 years old and i am not prone to violence i get A’s in all my classes (senior) and I love my parents very much just for spanking me. I was a brat and there was no other way i could have learned.
My cousins never got spanked. ever. their mom thought it was wrong and that reasoning would work. boy did that bomb. they are extremely annoying little brats that care only for themselves and the two are teenagers. I think it is thanks to these retards that will never spank there kids that we have these gay law suits over the stupidest things.
People dont teach the Bible in schools anymore and they dont spank their kids. back when they did you would never hear of a school shooting or anything even close. now it seems like it is a daily event. I blame that on parents and lack of morals (what parents are supposed to teach).
I’d say about four. they’re old enough to realize something they don’t like happens when they do something bad. just as long as you as the parent lets them know you still love them, and as long as it’s only a swat and nothing even close to “beating.” and it should stop at 6 or 7 – after awhile it gets embarrassing and you lose a little of their respect.
I am aginst spanking. and the spanking of a babies hand is the worst. they say it is just to protect them from shit like sticking their finger in a light socket, but you’re not reaslly teaching your kid anything by doing that except that you’ll hit them if they do it again. At an age where they are to young to understand why not to do certain things you should just keep a better eye on them until it can be explained to them. Or just buy some fuckin outlet gaurds or whatever you call those little plastic things you stick in the outlet. Stop the promoyion of violence to children. even at a very early age children are starting to learn that violence is ok because of corpral punishment. Learn to teach instead of beat! But what the hell do I know?
i would say not to spank them at all, violence breeds violence
How many of your responders have kids? I raised 7. The age to quit depends on the child. We never spanked ours often, but did more when they were preschoolers than later. I used a small wooden board. When they were older, all I had to do was go get the board or threaten to, and they’d behave.
I hope I’ll never smack a child. I think it gives contradictory messages…
“Violence is wrong little Jimmy” Whack! …”How dare you be disrespectful to me” Wallop! “You are being totally unreasonable! Obey me because I’m bigger and stronger than you” Bam!
My Mum used to rule by force and we never respected her for it. We just became resentful and perhaps even naughtier because she used violence rather than reason.
Respect is earnt, not demanded. Small children have to learn who’s boss for their own good I understand but surely there’s a better way.
I admit I’m not a mother.
hmmmm….I’d say seven or eight…and to be used sparingly up until that age. I don’t think you should spank ALL the time, there has to be other ways also.
Never
it depends on how you spank becuse some people hwen they spank they really actually hit, harder than they mean to. i think a stare to bore through the eyeballs is enough, that can be pretty scary ; ^ /
when****
I am a “victim” of spanking, and it most absolutely positively works, when done in a loving manner, the child might not get that at first, but if a parent explains to them that they love them and they’re spanking them to show them what’s wrong (lying, disobedience, etc.) then that’ll work, if a parent is not telling them that or just beating them for the “entertainment” of it, then that’s sick and abuse. I think spanking should be incorporated until it is no longer effective, so like, say after two or three spankings the kid goes back and does the bad thing again, it’s time to find a new mode of dicsipline, for ex. grounding, confiscating a toy or computer game, nintendo, etc. Everyone has something that they can’t stand to lose, or can’t stand to have (money and pain for example), for a 16 year old with their license on a weekend it can be devastating to take away their keys, unless they’re a game nerd (nerds are cool btw), in which case you ground them from the game/game machine for x amount of time, pain… any pain inflicted must be very temporary and strictly non-injuring (a red mark that last an hour doesn’t count, a black n blue bruise that lasts several hours or days does count), this can limit the effectiveness of it, but again, there are other negative incentives to give a child when they do something wrong, and positive incentives to encourage them to do stuff right.