January 12, 2006
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Physical Traits Part 2
I have been at this conference all week in North Carolina. I walked into the conference a few days ago with a certain strategy in mind. This is a leadership conference and sometimes they will play little games in the beginning to challenge your leadership abilities. I like to win these games. They will have about 400-500 leaders who will all be on equal footing. Most of them don’t know each other in advance.
They break you into groups of about 100. I walked in thinking in advance that I was going to try to be subtle and maneuver politically within the group. I would sort of do that to try to win whatever game they would play. It is good at these conferences to stand out as a leader. Some organizations come to these conferences just looking for people to hire. Even though I am not looking for a job, I just think it is a great opportunity.
So I walked through the door and I am one of the last people to arrive. My strategy was to just go around and be friendly with people. I just try to physically touch each person. It allows you to influence their decisions later. But I was a little late. People had been networking for about a half hour. I walked in just as they were calling everyone together.
They started a game and they wanted the group to elect leaders. We would break down into smaller groups and we would elect more leaders. Then we would break down into smaller groups and elect more leaders. I am the type of person that never tries to be a leader initially. No matter what I am involved in, I just try to lay back and watch the group.
So I entered this room as they were electing who would be leader over the whole group of a hundred. I had walked into the room and was literally just hearing them call the group together. I walked over to the circle and within 2 minutes of walking into the room I was the leader. I was surprised at how it worked out.
I am wondering to what degree my height has played a role in this my whole life. I was always the tallest in the class. People always thought I was older than I was. So I think that my height has played a large role in developing myself as a leader. When people always look up to you physically, it tends to give you an advantage in leadership.
The same thing happened to me in basic training in the military. We got off the bus and the drill instructor went around yelling at everyone. He stopped in front of me and said to me, “You are going to be dorm chief.” I had not spoken a word. I heard in basic training that you want to blend in. That was my goal. But now all of a sudden I couldn’t blend in. I was now the leader of the 50 guys. I think my height had to be the largest factor.
I wonder how much my height has played a factor in how I have lived my life. I wonder if I was shorter if it would have done something to my self esteem. I wonder if people treating me differently growing up would have made a difference in my life today.
To what degree has your physical features and physical stature played a role in where you are today?
Comments (142)
Well, athletics is HUGE in my life, and the life of my family.
Yeah right – not at all
But my physical stature is not the ideal sportsman’s body (at least without work). I’m only 5 ‘ 9″ and weigh just under 150. THe muscle, of course, is my duty to lay on myself.
I’m glad the curly, hobbit hair came ‘in’ recently. That was helpful.
hey, wasn’t yesterday prayer day? what happened?
Since I’ve been both a dancer & a make-up artist @ diff times in my life….I’d say it mattered at those times.
Candy
As for the question I have a couple of …attributes… that got me alot of attention when I was younger but I spend alot of time trying to cover them up now. In the long run I don’t think they got me anywhere I wanted to be.
well, I’m married with kids…maybe looks had something to do with it…LOL
But I never had problems finding jobs…but I was also friendly and seemed sweet and innocent…haha
11th
I have no idea
I think this is an interesting question. I have been overweight most of my life and I while I don’t think anyone has purposely discriminated against me I do think it has had reprecussions on my life. I think it has effect everything from dating (maybe I’d be married if I was skinnier…) to my job. I’ve heard from numerous people that overweight people are mean, they come off unaproachable. I generally think I’m a nice person but I think the times that I’m quiet may come off differently than if my skinny friends were quiet. I don’t know if this makes any sense but I think it has effected almost all parts of my life.
I’m short and blonde, so that’s doesn’t help with first impressions that much, lol. I’m fairly initiative though, and I get jobs done, so I am often seen as the leader. I don’t always like that, I just think it’s funny. In our youth group I’m usually the one that has to organize things because I’m the only female over 12. So I guess being a girl has helped somewhat since half time time people assume we have organizational skills.
Alot, I’m kinda a leader aswell, and it’s probablly be cause I am the biggest out of the group.
There are statistics that prove that taller and more “atractive” peole do eran more and are more successful… I still think that i got the job I got PARTIALLY because the VP of my company thinks I’m attractive.
I am a leader in my profession and pretty much always have been. My wife says it is because of my personality but I think it has something to do with my stature also. Like you I too am tall. I also look older than I am. My favorite saying is don’t let the grey hair fool you.
it happens a lot….and another factor in your example could have been that in some groups….as you said, they want to kick back and blend in….and so when the new guy walks in late….they nominated you as the leader, since no one wanted to do it.
but yeah your height probably played a factor in your boot camp. and im sure it affects a lot of peoples decision (physical appearance)
i mean guys are nicer to good looking females then average looking females (when nothing is said). thats just part of life.
Leadership is something I’m usually pretty reluctant about. I’m the guy in a discussion who doesn’t do a lot of talking, but when I do it’s usually worth hearing. But I can take charge, and I will if no one else is competent. I’m six-one, and if I project my voice I can speak to a group fairly well.
I’ve always been tall and skinny and not voluptuous. So I’ve always been more of a tomboy. Don’t know if I think the two are correlated or not.
My husband isn’t particularly tall, but his bearing gets him elected leader quite frequently. He is quiet and friendly and diplomatic and “teflon” in public situations.
Sometimes when I read your posts, you remind me of him in the ways you think. So it might be more to do with your personality. Maybe you are an alpha dog. LOL
I found standing up straight, and talking with a clear voice that carries well helps a lot. I usually do well talking to people over the phone, because my voice makes me sound about 20 years older than I am.
Being clean and well dressed usually gives people a good first impression, and being careful with your body language and how you talk can get you a long way in conversations and interviews.
I’ve never been turned down for a job once I got called for an interview, and I think careful attention to these things plays a big part.
I think physical appearence plays a big part in people’s decisions, –at the same time I don’t think it should. I make judgements on other’s appearence, but I don’t want to be judged by mine. Its one of those things in life that I don’t think will change.
I’ve been told I’m rather imposing. Being 6’2″, it’s hard not to be, especially when my natural facial features apparently look like a perpetual glare. It has quite a tangible effect on most people I meet, and quite a few people I know, but it doesn’t seem to affect my close friends much.
I meant “taller and more ‘atractive’ peole do earn more and are more successful (meaning they climb the coorporate ladder higher than average stature folks).” I am also 5’9″ (tall compared to the average woman). One of my best girlfriends is 6’2″ (and very good looking) and, honestly, whenever we went out together it was imposible not to get a lot of male atention….
I dont think that being tall and/or good-looking is really the key factor thou, I think it is the confidence that you show that matters more. People will be attracted or have more trust/confidence in you if you show you are confident and secure of yourself first.
lol, my physical characteristics have helped me SO much along the way. Not that I’m top notch or anything but it sure did help. I flirted my way up, lol. But hey…. I havent and will not hurt anyone along the way….I know how to abuse wisely. kekekke
I don’t believe that my physical stature or appearance has very much affected my ‘role’ in where I am as a sister, daughter, or a friend.
At times, people tend to think I’m older. Though I think it’s more my face than my height. I have a very average height.
So, I suppose that any niche I have carved out for myself had to have been my personality or my brain, which is how I do things, I suppose.
I’m actually very average looking … perfectly a-okay with me! I love blending in.
Thanks for an interesting question for today, Mr. TheologiansCafe!
God bless,
Shohna
Since I look older than my real age, I believe I was hired at age 18 for a company that may not have hired me if they knew my real age…
I’m taller too, and it helps. What type of conference are you in?
-Justin
Randomly commenting since ’06.
Well Im short, Im 4’10and I think I have become more bossy becuase I feel people think Im soft spoken and naive looking so I generally wear the pants in my relationships. Also I developed VERY fast and had older guys attracted to me as young as 11 years old and I lost my virginity at a young age becuase of this (I was 14 he was 22). So now here I am, very sexually mature (but not active) and I think its all becuase I developed so quickly.
Hmm…. I don’t think they have affected me very much at all, honestly.
RTC: Very good question. Actually, this is my first Eid-ul-Adha anyway, and I personally did not make a sacrifice. But the way that people usually do the sacrifice isn’t problematic. Most of the people I know have gone to halaal meat markets (markets where meat is slaughtered in the Islamic fashion) and had them slaughter it (a lamb, typically) for them and they just purchase it. Of course, in predominately Muslim countries, people usually just do it themselves. Each family does it (ie, one lamb per household). And if someone is IN Mecca for the hajj, then that person doesn’t have to worry about it. I believe this is correct..
Back when I was skinny, I got a job based on my cuteness. The supervisor told me a few months later that she needed people who are nice looking and she hired me because I was cute. I’m anxious to see how that works for me when I finally lose this weight.
I don’t know about that. I’m short and very young looking, but I have always been picked to be the leader as well. I think it has more to do with an aura you put off.
No idea.
haha.
I dunno.
I guess I’m treated how I look.
Just yesterday someone called me “gothic”
But I’m really not, I was just wearing a black jacket.
I think it has to do with stereotypes.
Which sucks.
And I hate that people catogorize people.
The majority of people frequently judge a person by their apperance.
I’ve learned this is a very unreliable way to do things.
I have always been thin and God gave me a very womanly looking body. I can’t really say, but most catagorize me as looking nice. So anyway, I notice that some of my friends that are more average looking, get less attention. I tend to have random people ask me out (which is not exactly a good thing) and I get discounts at restraunts from male waiters simply because I’m a girl. I don’t know if I was more average that I would have the friends that I do, or the personality that I have. It’s funny to think about. Most people are a lot nicer to the beautiful people, at least in my experience.
hmm…I don’t know. I use to be fit and loved to do things, but after having my kids I suffered from PPD alittle bit….that really changed me physically (I gained like 15lbs in 2 months). Now, I’m stuck with this extra weight and I’ll admit that I don’t get out and do things like I use too…..but I also don’t have the time that I use to have either. I guess it has played a role in where I’m at now in my life.
oh, that’s interesting. i really don’t know. i’m definitely not a tall guy…around 5’8″, but i’m pretty athletic and have been known as such for a long time. but i was senior class president, president of another extra-curricular student group, and have had various leadership roles through the years. at my current job i’ve been asked many times to be a manager, but i turn them down because it would interfere with school. huh. interesting.
Being a tall female early in life was at best, awkward. I did not enjoy being the tallest because all the shorter girls would gang up on me..I do not know if it was due to intimidation or just the fact that sometimes kids are mean. I was a complete tomboy, and had the shape for it. My self esteem was not the greatest, but I was comfortable settling on who I was. Then comes high school and it is a whole different ball game. My parents were not the wealthiest, so the clothing I chose was out of a selection of thrift store vintage..and I never fit in with the popular cliques. I hated cliques altogether, and tried to just put myself out there. Cruel jokes were told and the teasing never really stopped. I am ok with that though, because that little piece of my life has helped to create the me I am today….mom of 3, married to a very tall man..lol..trying to figure life out. So yes, I think if I had started life drop dead gorgeous, there would not have been that internal struggle that starts up the metamorphisis that is life…
I believe there have been formal studies in the past confirming that height and physical features do in fact infuence people’s perception of one’s leadership ability. Also, the way you dress is a factor. It’s sort of a self fullfilling situation; if you look like a leader you will become the leader.
In the past week I’ve been working with a high ranking corporate executive from Sweden who was just transfered here to Minneapolis. I’m 6’1 but that guy makes me feel like a pion, he towers over me at around 7 feet.
There are exceptions to the rule of course a good example being Napoleon Bonaparte at 6’2″, a man who towered over all others in his time.
I think physical characteristics define who a person is a lot. I’m a generally big person, I have a big personality, and have to buy bigger clothes. I’m 5’10 at 17. I’m taller that most of the guys in my church, and alot of the younger kids look up to me. regardless of whether or not ppl say they do, everyone judges a person by how they look. that’s why most of us don’t give money to the homeless person on the street corner. he’s dressed poorly, needs a LONG shower and reeks of boos anyway.
how ppl treat us can and usually does contribute to how we view ourselves. I was the “large marge” in my kindergarten class through 2nd grade and I’ve had to fight a low self-esteem almost ever since. I have a musical talent that most ppl i know don’t have. i can sit down at the piano and have a publishable song in literally 5minutes. ppl respect that feature in me, encourage me to persue it.
that helps determine who you are.
My husband is 6’5. And he’s a natural leader. People tend to look up to him. And not only that. he is good at what he does. He has this personality that people are drawn too. He tries to achieve the best numbers.. the best attutide and seems to draw the best out of people that work under,for,and with him.
As a wife.. I feel extremly safe with him.
Christina
Interesting question. One I’m not sure of the answer. I think being tall is more advantageous than being short (which I am).
I do not think height has really played much of a roll in my life, except in Volleyball.
Other attributes? Hmmmm
I think it does, height/weight/appearance it all play a factor. People just assume certain things, I think is human nature.
i was born with bright red hair…nothing else mattered – i always stood out! it has since mellowed with age…along with the obligatory temper…
and exactly how tall are you?
I am short, but strong. People think of me as naive and innocent initially, but those who know me know me as a leader and a strong-headed person. I’ve never had my intelligence, discounted, though — probably the glasses? Being a woman in a mostly-male group has never truly worked to my disadvantage, but I’m wondering if that will change in law school?
being extremely height challenged….. I think I have always made sure people noticed me. Sometimes this has worked well… I developed good people skills, am friendly and outgoing and sometimes funny. Other times… not so good, I tended especially when younger to act out to get attention… although never in school, there I tried to blend in. The worst part though….. is trying to get that last bottle of dressing of the top shelf in the supermarket!
people think i’m younger than what I really am, and that’s fine by me, as far as the impact it’s played on my life, meh. I never really toook notice.
Because I’m short people think that I am cute/weak/nice.
I couldn’t be anything BUT.
I’ve always been looked at as a tall person and rather bright.
I try to hide my smarts, but I can’t hide my height.
I don’t really know where I’d be if I were any different.
Nicholas
Since I am a woman, men never think I know anything about cars. Even when I know a heckofalot more than they do.
I think it’s interesting that you mentioned your height. I think we see certain physical traits as a representation of our strengths. Height being leadership and strength. I watched a documentary about the signals our bodies send, and our reaction to them. It was interesting to learn, for example, that the fullness of a woman’s lips signal a readiness to mate. Sometimes with all our intelligence we forget that we do have instincts and act on them everyday.
*Wish I had a better example than the lips LOL but it’s the first thing that came to mind.
I think God gives some people the gift of leadership with the understanding they can handle it. Interesting that God showed you in this circumstance that he was the one giving it to you, not anything you did.
I am a Stalky (athletic) guy. When I lift weights I tend to bulk up very quickly. People tent to avoid confrontation with me. I am actually very non confrontation, but I rarely have to worry about being pushed.
kept me from a boyfriend, i’m pretty sure.
Hmmmm…interesting question. I’ve been thin and I’ve been overweight, and overall that hasn’t been a huge factor other than I’m not happy with myself when I’m overweight. I’m not a “hottie” either.
As for physical attributes that played a role in where I am today? I wish I knew. I too tend to be tossed into the leadership role at times. I never understood what exactly caused that. I’m 5’5″ so it isn’t height. The only guess I can give is that I’m not shy and love to talk to people….anybody really, but that’s not a physical trait. So basically I said all that to say I don’t know. LOL!
Quite a bit actually. I tend to blend in, with my 5’3″ stature… Husband J, on the other hand, is an imposing 6’3″, wrestler’s build (OK, retired wrestler…), and has a booming voice. He commands attention. When he doesn’t command it, he takes it by sheer decibel level.
When I was younger, skinny and geeky, guys ignored me or treated me as their little sister and adults just thought of me as a kid. Since then I have ‘developed’ quite a bit and gained a lot of confidence as well, believe me it makes a HUGE difference. When I take the effort to dress up and look nice I love the attention … but most days I just blend in to the crowd, which is easy since I’m not that tall (5’4″).
I’d say you lucked out in the Looks Lottery, especially with your height. Props on being elected leader, Dan.
Well, I’m short (5’5″) and just yesterday one of my son’s friends at school thought I was his sister….
Um…i have no……………………………..idea…hahahaha^^
I’m petite. Alright I’m TINY. I’m 5’2″ and 110 pounds. I think it has a lot to with how people view me. Also how I view others. I have an inferiority complex, I hate having to look UP at people to talk, it makes me feel small and unneeded, like a gnat or something. I almost always wear heels, because then I’m just a little bit taller. People want someone tall and strong to be doing the job, not some tiny little girl. The only thing that has saved me is my voice. I have the deepest voice known to mankind. Deep, raspy. If I had a high voice I think that would do me in.
-Hil
I worked for the state for 30 years. Since they need people with skill it doesn’t make that much difference there. In the real working world not everyone is as beautiful as on television we all know that. As long as you present yourself with confidence and neatness, and you know your business, size doesn’t seem to matter that much in that arena. People there are tall, short, overweight, thin, some perfect, some not. With a work force of about 60,000 skill counts the most. I think maybe it is an inner quality…….maybe it’s something inside of you Dan……………..Oh, MY experience? No comment I’m retired!
I’m taller then average and it always feels quite ackword when I am around an entire group of people shorter then me, but it has helped me take leadership in activities. I really don’t have much of a base to go from because I am only 18, so I’ll see how my physical features help or hinder me in the workforce.
I’m 5’7″ and I always had a devil of a time attracting men who were taller than I was. (My husband is 5′ 6″.) Most of the tall men I’ve known seem to prefer their women extra-short. I’ve met very few exceptions to this rule. So I think if I’d been a couple inches shorter, I could have married someone 6′ or taller. But actually, I’m glad things worked out the way they did. I only miss wearing heels occasionally.
Well I would say it has affected me a fair amount. I’m in masonry and strength and endurance is necssary for that type of work.
they say that taller people are on average more successful than shorter – just because of their prescence
i was hired originally as a waitress at this pub based solely on my looks, i was all dressed up headed to my job in retail at that time and was hired by a lesbian who most definately looked me up and down and only asked if i had ever waitressed before, she never checked my references, just gave me a day for training — good thing i guess, ive been at that place making good money for two years
Hmm. Im 5′ 10” and a bit athletic (I would like to think). Im not terribly tall for a 16 year old, and maybe thats why I can’t think if a single instance it effected me.
Seeing as how I am 5’0″ and misconstrued as being either in my mid-twenties or being a sophomore in high school because of my physical looks, people either a) entrust me as being the leader or person in charge or b) never think twice about what I could offer and look past me.
I will get taller, eventually.
I’m sure I would be in a different place if God had given me a different body… but I can’t even begin to imagine how. None of the major decisions in my life seem to be directly related to my body type.
Sadly, I think it definitely helps for what I do.
Hmph. I hate that.
Well, I’m on Weight Watchers, if that tells you anything…
since im only 20 and i work with my parents…not much lol…but i guess we’ll see as times go by…when i was skinnier than i am now i got more attention but thats about it…and i look younger than i really am…hmm…im going to go post about my experience 2 days ago concerning my age..thanks for the idea dan! haha jk
Rachel
Being barely 5ft tall, I think it plays a huge part. Both in how I present myself.. and hence, how others would see me. Well, that’s if they see me! But I guess that’s what 4″ heels are for!
:: I tried to forego pictures today! Still too racy for the average passer-by’er?
All the ladies are hot for my bod. Everyone wants a piece of Da Pork.
Growing up I, too was head and shoulders above my classmates. I, too, am a strong leader. I’m a 6′ woman. It’s kind of funny, whenever I walk down the street, I constantly get people looking up at me, then glancing at my feet. I kept on trying to figure out why they were looking at my big feet but then I realized they were looking at my SHOES… just to see if I was cheating or if I was really that tall. I catch myself doing this to other tall women and it’s almost like a weird competition thing. I can’t really explain it… you other tall women out there understand.
My height has played a role in my dating life, for sure. If a guy is shorter than, oh, 5’11″, he’s automatically disqualified (even though short guys LOOOVE tall women).
I think sometimes because I look young and am in such a professional field my patients question my knowledge alot. Because I’m straight out of school I feel that I actually am more current on the research in treatments than some of my colleagues who have been out awhile. It always bothers me when people ask how old I am or how long I’ve been practicing. It makes me think they are doubting my abilities. And it just doesn’t help that I have a young looking face.
I am a leader and I am tall, but I think it takes more than heighth. Gentle smile, Judi
i honestly don’t know…i get mostly where i want to go on my personality…maybe that answers the question….Cheers!
Megan
I think that it DOES have something to do with it,
I’m a tall man and I suppose that my stature coupled
with the way I carry myself has allowed me to lead
in alot of situations I would not have thought possible.
Physical appearance plays a large part in subconscious decisions. Since subconcisious decisions ultimately influence conscious decisions, physical appearance (height in particular) plays a large role in life. Read “Blink” by Malcom Gladwell for more on this.
Of course, I only perceive Dan as looking like C.S. Lewis, so my decisions about him are based on his mock-physical appearance, as are yours of me.
that is an interesting question. because we present ourselves with how we percieve ourselves. people size us up with how we look. it is interesting how those two things balance out. i was alot shyer and more reserved when i was younger. i play the cute card alot more often now because i am older and not shallow cute. and probably not as cute as i think i am. so, it is more boldness. interesting question!
it definitely plays a role in first impressions, which generally are important when you are getting to know people.
just curious, how tall are you?
i also find it amusing how old a person looks affects how they are treated. when i started college, most people thought i looked old enough to be a senior and generally treated me with respect. when they realized i was only seventeen, i was once again the insignificant freshman. sigh . . .
i work at a coffee shop, and last month i learned that our boss listens to us when someone applies for a job, and we consider them attractive. i’m good friends with almost all of my coworkers now, but apparently i was hired because a guy who used to work at the coffeeshop (and never worked there while i worked there) thought i was cute. i’m also tall for a girl though, so who knows
i’m short and somewhat curvy. my hair makes me get a lot of looks. my eyes are green. some people say i look exotic…others say i look adopted. i think my physical features seperate me from my mother..whom i don’t like very much.
H
I don’t really think that it has much to do with nursing. Either you are a good nurse or you aren’t. I guess maybe it would make the doctors easier to work with the prettier you are, but then again, if he’s actually a good doctor I would hope it wouldn’t matter.
i end up smiling and laughing a lot in new situations, because i find that its easier than coming up with something to say. people usually think of me as that nice, happy girl. sometimes that causes problems, though, because i feel like if i share my difficulties, or become upset, people will be taken aback.
I’m 5′ nothing when I stand up straight, have short hair, and love to play sports. I have to work harder than others to prove my worth on a team, and it’s always so hard to get used to guys flocking to my side (the only time that ever happens) every little time someone runs into me or makes me fall down. Thank goodness I don’t have a high voice or that would be the kiss of death for me (although I’m sure some people probably think I’m gay with my short hair and deep voice;-P). However, sometimes, people will let me get close to them because I look nonthreatening and all that good stuff.
RYC: Yeah, but the judge isn’t making it hard on him, by any means.
I sometimes sense that being Asian helps me give off a good first impression. People automatically think I’ve got it together, that I’m ambitious and well-educated, etc. I just try my best to remain humble.
Height also plays a big role in first impressions. Tall people automatically exude presence and stature. I’m 5′-6″ – it doesn’t bother me so much, though I wouldn’t mind being four inches taller.
RYC: NYC would blow you away. So much to do… but make sure to bring lots of moolah for your various activities.
A lot because nowadays, image is so important to the business world.
Hmm? I’m not really sure? I like to think the blessing and favor of the Lord got me where I am today, that and my sparkling personality –
ryc: Very TRUE! – I think that’s how pathological liars define themselves too.- w/ all the drama.
Height has a lot to do with how people judge you initially. After some exposure, ture abilities come through and it becomes secondary.
Honestly, I don’t know.
I do know I do use my looks to play dumb whenever I can get away with it. If somebody, mostly men, is going to give me what I want b/c I accidently showed my cleavage, then I will go with it. I am convinced that my looks have made it easier for me to get where I am in my life. I would still have my intellect and personality if I did not look the way I do, but my looks get me noticed, my brain and personality let people know that I am more than capable of competing with them. I think that I would have to work harder to prove myself if I didn’t look the way I do.
Then again, when I was in my early twenties and people thought I was a teenager, I was constantly having to prove myself, and people treated me the way they treat teenagers. I would get annoyed and I understood why teenagers were angry and mistrustful of adults.
Erika
I am short but verbal….and I think my tendency to be “chatty cathy” gives me a little boost sometimes.
When I was a baby-faced 6’2″ 170 lbs., I had trouble. My freshman year of college, it was a fight (literally) to get the other guys on the football team to respect my abilities let alone me as a person.
As a 21-year-old, 6’3″ 250 lbs, however, I rarely had trouble from anyone – on the field or off. Size is a benefit.
Still, I’m wary of aggressive people who are smaller than I am. I’m always reminded of the words of Dwight Eisenhower:
“It’s not necessarily the size of the dog in the fight, but the size of the fight in the dog.”
I’m 5’2″, which I consider short, but I am so happy to be as ‘tall’ as I am. When I was growing up I was very small. When I started 6th grade I was 4’5″. Most of the teachers and parents treated me as though I were a lot younger. In restaurants I would be given a kids menu, when my other 6th grade friends were given adult menus. It used to make me really mad and hurt.
I started my senior year of high school being 5 feet even. Then a miracle happened- I grew an inch! I was 18 years old, and suddenly sprouted! Then, my senior year of college it happened again: 22 years old and I was growing! What a fluke. Now people no longer refer to me as being short. They tell me all the time that I am too thin, but that’s a different story.
Back to your question though…. people who are hiring for jobs tend to like me. I think this has a lot to do with the fact that I am average pretty and average height. Nevermind my qualifications- no one in their right mind could be intimidated by me and I don’t look like I have physical characteristics to make me an immediate doormat. LOL
RYC: I appreciate everything you told me on my latest blog and no it was not inappropriate! It is stories like yours that are helping me learn about this whole “newly married/baby” process. In case you hadn’t noticed, I’m clueless on the subject so it’s always good to hear another similar experience! Thanks so much for sharing!
The political stance to out due everyone shows how much people love putting other down.
At the same time they are sucking up, and flirting up, smarting up, they are exclaiming that they really do love other.
They put everyone else down by their actions, but their heart is far from love.
Love looks out for the interests of others!!
Though you are “not trying to hurt anyone in the process”, you are hurting them.
It is pretty lonely to be at the top, and when you look back to all of the climbing of this political ladder that you have done, you can see where it got you. ALONE
You may be proud of your accomplishments now.
You call it survival, and self-gratification, but in the end you just want to end your life, and you are never fully satisfied.
There is a solution to this mess!!!
Do you really seek it??
I can tell you, but I do not think you really want it.
I mean look at the following you have gotten.
I am now going to subscribe to you in order to understand how a selfish mind works.
Brent Carl Whitaker
Everyone of your followers gravels in their own accomplishments. Self convinced of their own righteousness.
hmmmm i dont know probally my vertically challengedness kept me away from alot of sports because i would like fly 10 feet away when sum1 else would push me but then again i pushed rightback i dont know lol
[LPJZ]
well, I am pretty small which just adds to my hyper/wired image I tend to portray
and I have stuck with glasses, which people take as a sign of definite nerdiness now that literally anyone can get contacts, even small children
quite a bit… when i was younger, i was always really shy, yet i was always in the ‘popular group.’ it’s stupid, and i hated it, because none of my friends actually ever got along. however, after some time, we all warmed up to eachother, and became more accepting to other kids in out class and there really were no ‘cliques’ anymore. even all the way up to graduation–literally our WHOLE class [almost 300 people] came to the grad. party. it was pretty cool.
wow that is very intersting. you think they chose you primarily because of your height? what happened in those 2 minutes?
i look young, and i’m asian. haha i think those are disadvantages in the business world.
I think the short person is the leader. Tall people have longer legs and a longer torso so their brains get less blood making them dumber and less capable. No wait, that is an argument for them being leaders.
I do not think my physical traits have influenced me much. Perhaps if I were bigger, I would have done better in high school athletics…
people call me a prostitute. i don’t know why. but they give me money.
I’m quite small and seem to seep niceness from my veins. I’ve always been assumed to be “smart” in school. Whether this is related to my small size and big smile, I’m not sure!
i defied my usual physical abilities today.. yay!
My physical features have always made me look younger than I am, so I give off that cute and innocent vibe that usually doesn’t help me get great jobs in high places, and gets me out of trouble with guys.
I’ve always worked out a lot, so I’ve landed cool jobs however, like being a dancer at a club. Much more entertaining than typical boring college jobs, with a lot of cool benefits like free club passes, and all sorts of fun promotions.
However, I make money on the side of school by modeling, which obviously couldn’t happen if I didn’t look the way I look. My height tho, prevents me from ever going very far with modeling since I’ll never be able to do runways.
I think physical appearance has a decent bit to do with our interactions with people, whether we want to admit that or not. As a reasonably attractive girl, I’m sure I’ve gotten treated differently at times than someone who may not be very good looking–whether that be for better or worse. Also b/c my skin is so pale, people usually assume I’m an average white american girl and are shocked to find out I’m half latina. The fact that I am so “white” at times has made me feel uncomfortable or self-conscious among people of color b/c of the assumptions I feel they might be making of me (funny how our minds do that).
So, yeah, I think our appearance has more of an effect on random circumstances in our lives than we usually assume at first glance.
Yes, I am dwarfish except for my head which is enormous.
I never get chosen as leader and I an thankful for that as I have no common sense and no leadership ability.
I am the one that gets sent to the auto parts store to get a can of halogen fluid to refill the headlights.
L,r
I play trombone in some all-state/district honor bands, and I’m usually the only girl who was good enough to make it. I think the sex appeal thing has definitely helped me out, both with making friends quickly and with having people think I’m better than I am, and I admit, I’ve used the I’m-the-only-chick-in-the-section thing to my advantage more than once. Heh
One of my teachers let me read an evaluation letter he wrote for my optometry school applications. He wrote something about my soft voice and appearance making me approachable. My voice bothers me sometimes, because it’s high-pitched and older people often can’t hear me… but I guess it can be a good thing too.
I’m really short for a teen male who is done growing (5’4″), and I really only feel limited when it comes to what I want to do most – acting. Although I might have a decent face and a good voice, I can’t be the leading man if I’m not taller than the leading lady.
To a massive degree.
ppl think im really young/immature
People underestimate me because I just look like some scruffy worthless kid. Then, they are knocked on their asses when I unleash my intellectual weapons of mass destruction.
Hahahha
I LUV AZN’S
AZN’S AND BULIMICS COME SEE ME!
I hope that doesn’t make a difference, but I’m sure it does. In today’s world, I’m sure it does.
As an obese woman, it’s affected nearly everything. I’ve been denied jobs because of it. Guys have avoided me because of it. Buying a pair of pants is a day-long chore because it’s hard to find a pair that fits right. People stare at the really fat woman in the store, eating a burger, trying to squeeze into an airplane seat. People are always judging me because of my size.
Plus there’s the matter of self-esteem: I have very little of it, if any at all. I’d like to think that if I had grown up to be thin, or even just a little fat, that I would feel better about myself. And hating myself affects what I do every day of my life.
Don’t get fat.
I’m a abig woman with both hieght and weight, and I’m nornmally left alone with any kind of heavy lifting ect. however, if I start up the southren accent real stong, then I get help…. madness… Court
I have been short, petite (until I hit 40!) with blonde hair and blue eyes. I could really get almost anything I wanted! I have also looked younger than my age which made others want to protect me. So yes, my appearance has made a difference in my life. But, at the same time it could be uncomfortable especially when men would make passes at me after I was married. But on the other hand, I was raised that beauty is only skin deep so I am always aware of my attitude toward others and try not to depend on others for my success or self worth.
Hmmm…Absolutely none. Alot of people misjudge me on first impressions. I am short,brunette,I apparently have a sweet and innocent look about me, and for some reason…People think I am going to be outgoing and such. Sadly, thats not the case. I am shy to boot around people I’m not familiar with, and have a mischivious streak a mile wide.
ur military commander thot that ur height would intimidate ur fellow military friends! haha.. lol
i love ur site so much! i like how you post experiences like the leadership. so maybe it’ll help me or osmething when i look for a good job hehe. and i like it the most when u posted the stalker thing and how u said that u would always read the ocmments no matter what..and u praise ur stalkers too..well ud ont mind them hehe. signed, ur tsalker
Physical appearence as far as the way I look only gets me places in my personal life which is Somewhat irrelavant to most people. But the way I carry myself, like standing up straight,personal hygeine, and having self esteem, have gotten me alot of places but my personal life is more relavant to me than a job interview for instence. All the other shit is just money or or getting ahead in life. Not that is bad, but I personally don’t care where I’m at just as long as I’m not alone.
This is an interesting question! I’m on the short side, and I have a strong suspicion that my husband would not have seriously dated me if I were taller than he is. He is very short for a man, so that obviously played a big role. Interestingly, I think I liked that about him. I don’t think I would like being married to a man who towered over me, one I couldn’t look in the eye while standing beside him.
I also look young for my age. I remember being asked if I were at least fifteen to sit on the exit row of an airplane when I was 23! I was also told by a grocery store clerk she would card me if I tried to buy alcohol, and I was at least 30 at the time. The only effect I can imagine that has had is possibly sometimes a lack of respect, but I don’t think it has made much difference otherwise.
i live in a country crawling with horny single men and bigamists, so if i call for a taxi, a taxi will be where i need it to be in less than 3 minutes. if a male friend of mine calls and asks for one at the same place, the taxi will come in 20 minutes, even if they say it will be there in 3 minutes. if they hear a female voice, they will respond quicker than they will with a male voice.
it’s really weird.
not that the voice is a physical feature, but that’s all i could really think about.
the size of my breasts have gotten me a better table in a restaurant and it got my friends and i free tickets to a movie….
as for jobs, i haven’t a clue, i’m only 15!
–paige
I wanted to go to the Air Force Academy to learn to fly as a fighter pilot, but I’m too short, unfortunately. So I’m looking for a college elsewhere, although I still want to join the military. Also, I’ve been treated like a college student since I look older than I really am. (even in the classes I take at a local community college, everyone thinks I’m college-aged, even though I’m only 16).
Of course people judge us by our physical appearances. How tall we are (or aren’t), the color of our skin, our weights, everything. I am not saying it is right I am just saying that studies have shown it to be true.
I am not sure whether my looks have contributed to — well, anything; I’m celibate, at any rate for the forseeable future, so that would be a moot point, and I believe I look unremarkably decent, rather than dark-and-dashing or conspicuously ugly, so there’s not much going there.
I do think this kind of illustrates something, though. I’ve been reading Don Miller’s ‘Searching For God Knows What’, and he talks about this lifeboat game: There’s a lifeboat with a male lawyer, a female doctor, a crippled child, a garbageman, and a stay-at-home mother on it. If you had to throw someone off, who would it be? (Most people say lawyer, by the way.)
But Don Miller says that in this whole fallen world, we all have a lifeboat mentality. We’re all giving implicit or even explicit reasons why we deserve to stay in the boat, and most especially why that guy deserves to be thrown out, at any rate a lot more than we do. Looks is one of the ways we do that: You’re ugly, so since I’m not I deserve to stay in the lifeboat and you should be pitched. It’s really sick, and it’s especially inappropriate for Christians — given that their God walks on water.
young people always want to look older while old people always want to look young.just be happy with your age and dont fuel the multi-billion dollar cosmetics industry.
I think so… but, not to be all religious or anything…., When I was a teenager, I bascally got whatever I wanted based on looks and my personality. The personality is still there but, my looks have seen fit to slide a bit due to weight gain from child bearing, and a Married life of staying home. Point is I think the Big G* has limited my own perception of my looks due to the damage He knows I would potentionaly inflict on myself and my family if given this bad too casually. Long story short…I’d be a handfull…–chelle
hmmmm….that’s an excellent question. I guess I’ve never really thought about it…but I would feel funny if the president of the united states was short. I’m short, (only 5, 3) so I obviously have nothing against short people….wow…I’m gonna have to think about this one some more.
I’m rather in the same boat you are. I’m one of the tallest in my class and people tend to ask me for advice.
You say you think your height had a lot to do with it. I find it interesting that in spite of how you would normally have situations be, you seem to (often?) be put in leadership positions. Sure, you’re tall, well so you’ve told us, but Who made you tall? Anyway, just was thinkin a little on that. Just thought I’d share. God keep you.
I’m 159cms, which is about 5’3 or 5’4. I’ve always been considered ‘cute’. Then again, it could also be because I have a babyface.
I’m 5’3″ and it matters. I feel like I get overlooked all the time (no pun intended). I was always the little guy in class. But three things helped. 1.) Being picked on and made fun of helped me develop a great sense of humor 2.) I had other younger kids in the neighborhood that looked up to me because I was older and it helped me to develop as a leader. 3.) In high school, I had a great boy scout troop that required me lead.
If it were not for these three things, I’m am SURE that I would be way less confident and would not take on as much leadership responsibility as I have.
+2 props for you
I’m short (4’11) and so I’m never the leader. As long as you have the loudest voice in the room, you’re still heard.
It’s not like I want to be the leader anyway.
verdi
Looks I think totally factor in to people’s opinions about others. I’m not too bad looking, and if I wasn’t as attractive I don’t think I would have the confidence that I do have. My confidence makes me a better leader and I am able to say what I think. Honestly without looks I think I’d be much more shy, reserved, and less of a leader.
Point A. Being in the art field, people often associate my physical asthetics with my ability to create asthetics for them. This was observed in relation to other members of my class.
Point B. I am tall for a female and athletic in build. Coincedently or not, I also served as VP of National Honor Society, Class President 3 years, and captain of all three of the varsity sports I played on.
Effective? I believe yes
HAHAHAHAHA…im short, little, and look like a kid…most instantly assume that im innocent. i have the easiest time holding conversations w/others and having them trust me. not that im not trust worthy but i guess that my harmless look makes it easier for people to trust.
i completely believe that your physical appearance does help or hinder your career. as a “plus sized princess” i have been passed over for promotions by people who were less qualified and less likely to be a long term employee because of my size. people think that if you are overweight you must therefore, be lazy.
This is not a typical physical feature like you are talking about, but I have an identical twin sister, and sometimes this changes the way people feel about me. To some, not all because grouping everyone together would be unfair, being a twin means since you look alike, you must be the same emotionally and intelligently. If I join a club or sport or activity, and she doesn’t join, some tend to ask “Why is it that you did such and such and Lauren didn’t?”. And I could go on and on about the dressing alike, sharing a room, finishing each others sentences, connecting through our minds type things that people suggest. It can become irritating when people see you as one person, one personality and nothing more than that.
That is the main reason, I think, that twins/triplets/whomever usually make themselves as diverse as possible in style and person… to make sure everyone knows that each of them is in fact a different person.
- – > Ariana
I don’t think it had much effect on where I am because of it
oooh, my bf and i were just talking about this the other day… i think it’s true that taller people get more respect and i think i’ve read that they make more money as well. alas, i am short, but apparently i “walk tall”
hahahaa. my personality has to make up for my height! 