January 18, 2006

  • Underage Drinking

    I was at a party when I was 16 years old.  My parents told me to never drink.  At this party I thought I was going to drink for the first time.  So I took a few sips of the drink.  It gave me a slight buzz.  I then got in my car and drove home.  My mom figured out that I had drunk alcohol when I got home.  It was the only time I drank and then drove.  I probably wasn’t legally drunk but I was certainly a little buzzed.


    I was at another party when I was around 17 years old.  The mother was leaving for the evening to go to work.  She told us that she didn’t care what we did but we could not leave the house if we drank any beer.  She did not want us drinking and driving.  We all said “Ok.”  I called my mom and told her I was spending the night at a friend’s house and we drank but we followed the woman’s instructions and didn’t go out and drive.


    Is it smarter for a parent to let their son and daughter to drink in front of them to avoid the chance that they drink and drive?


     

Comments (159)

  • Thanks for the comment. I think a parent teaches their child responsibility when they allow them to drink with them.

  • A child won’t feel as much rebellion.

  • Yeah, I guess it’s smartER.

  • And also, about my post, doesn’t it sometimes help us get over things if we over-react?

  • my parents have done that with me, and have ever since i was born… had first drink at age 4… was beer… didnt like it much… still dont… but i drink quite regularly, and know the dangers of drinking too much… ive never been drunk, and never intend to do so…

    my aunt was killed in a drunk driving accident… i dont intend to follow…

  • Top 10 and yes, from personal experience.. I wish my parents had.

  • Sure if it saves lives……….

  • It does sound smarter, but I would also tell my kid to call me for a ride home if s/he’s drunk so they’d be safe.

  • most definately …
    most kids underage drink…
    and if they didn’t have to hide it so much i dont think it would be such a problem with the whole drinking and driving.
    They could then call their parent it they were drunk… or be supervised by one..

  • haha, not that i care very much, but: FIRST

  • Thanks for adding me to your protected list! You still remembered me?

  • yes

  • i think the parent should let the kids drink at home before they do it at like parties, so they know their limit, and how to handle themselves if they get drunk and stuff… i think the kids should be allowed to drink inside and outside the house… actually depending on how resonsible he/she is

  • how about you dont drink when you’re underage at all?

  • I think so! “Monitored drinking” from early teens will help kids build their alcohol tolerance so they will not get drunk as easily when they go binge drinking later on.

  • I’d be scared out of my mind to drink in front of my parents. The stuff I could say… eesh. That’d lead to bad places. But hey, if the parents are cool with it, I think it leads to a more open relationship, where the kid doesn’t feel so stifled.

  • I don’t think so, it’s bad to encourage drinking whatsoever

  • sounds like it is, but isn’t provide underage people with alcohol illegal as well?

  • provide = providing

  • Drinking underage should never be condoned.  But my father had a rule:  If I EVER drank at a party, and felt like I didn’t want to be leaving with anyone driving (or myself), I was to call him, no matter what the hour.  His promise was to say absolutely nothing after picking me up, and we’d just “talk” in the morning.  No repercussions were promised.  I only did this once, but it would have been a time I might have tried to make it home so as not to get in trouble.  He kept his word.

    I have made that promise to my teenager.  She has never called, but promised me that she would abide by my rule as well.

  • definetly.  my dad let me have as much wine as I wanted to at Passover and I voluntarily stopped after one and a half glasses.

    I know that my dad wouldn’t be pleased if he found out I was drinking, but he wouldn’t be majorly pissed either, and I would feel way more comfortable calling him for a ride than I ever would be driving or being driven home by someone who had been drinking. 

    I know a big part of that was because he hasn’t treated alcohol like a taboo subject.

    I think the same theory can also be applied to being open about sex/birth control, but I’m not really sure.

  • I don’t know that drinking in front of you rparents will keep you from drinking and driving, but i have a friend whose parents made him get badly drunk and see how he felt at like 13, so he’s never gotten drunk since that.  That works.  I don’t know that that is the best way, but it works.  My parents never really said anything about drinking and smoking and sex and stuff because I figured it all out.  And I knew that if I fucked up I’d have to answer to them.  And I don’t ever feel like doing that.  I’ve never been drunk.  I’ve never even led a lifestyle or had a pack of friends that I partied with or drank or anything like that with.  I lead a boring life compared to most high-schoolers.  I don’t drink, I don’t smoke or do drugs, I don’t have sex.  Sometimes I feel left out.  Now if I were going to public school back home, I might be closer to that stuff because I would know more people closely than here.  And living in the dorm, I couldn’t get away with much anyway.

  • I’m with talk2ben.  Best way is to make sure the kid understands the problems with drinking and chooses not to.

    Tim

  • NO.  I think you should tell your kids that while you don’t condone underage drinking, you would be willing to come pick them up for ANY reason and then tell them horror stories about drunk driving accidents.  :P

    Stress that while drinking is an adult choice, drinking and driving is never a mature or rational choice, since you are risking lives.  If they get caught drinking, not so bad, maybe there will be a little lecture—but if they get caught driving while impaired…. BIG DEAL, LOSS OF CAR PRIVLEDGES.

  • man… that’s tough. Laws are there for a reason. Granted, the kids will probably break them. most kids taste alcohol before they are of age to do so. You could let your kid have a beer at your own house, but nobody else’s kids. this way your kid will know what he/she is missing out on by not partying, and you’re not procuring to minors. I wouldnt let my kid go out and party, even if they said they were going to stay there. liquid courage is nothing to take a chance with.

  • recently i drank quite a bit of wine (i’m 13 yrs) while my mom and best friend were there– they were both sober– and it was just like an exceptionally happy evening. it wasn’t bad or anything, and i absolutley don’t think it should be illegal if you do it responsibly or you have a non-drunk ride.

  • kinda figured as much.

  • Uhh, how about just don’t think at all?? Wow, there’s a thought.

  • Uhh, how about just don’t drink at all?? Wow, there’s a thought. (Sorry, earlier one said “think”)

  • No, they shouldn’t be drinking at all.

    Nicholas

  • The don’t word make’s us do.
    Let the kid drink a little supervised so you can teach them good habits about it.

    Otherwise we’re left to learn on our own and.. well.. that’s not always pretty.

  • that’s a toughie…..I guess it would make sense

  • Definitely, right? But, first off, they shouldn’t be drinking at all.

  • Hm…. I’m not sure what I think.  I deal with far too many drunk drivers to have a normal opinion of this question.  I’d really really rather that if someone – I don’t care who and I don’t care how old – drinks, they don’t drive.

  • I could have drank at home, but just never did. Neither of my parents drank or smoked. Dad forbade us to smoke but we could drink. I don’t drink but I used to smoke. Go figure.

    Have a blessed week & God keep you safe, healthy and happy. HUGS

  • my parents made, and continue to make, it abundantly clear that they will be very disappointed if I drink underage. They trust me totally, and they’re extremely proud of me, and I could never bring myself to hurt them by drinking. also, they have shown me and i have seen the destructiveness and worthlessness of drinking.
    1 Corinthians 6:19

  • well i guess it’s better than doing it behind their back or anything but still its underage drinking. but i’m almost 16 and have never drunk anything (alcohol wise) but i think thats good for me because i hear things from people and people tell me at my school that they drink sooo much and get wasted, blah blah. its just like wow. and i won’t even begin to talk about smoking, i hear about smoking a lot more in my school than drinking and i dont hearing about it because smoking is SO bad for your health, and i just don’t like smoking at all. hey maybe you could do an entry on smoking? i don’t know..?just a suggestion.

  • I’d say they should discourage drinking at all. I guess if it were my kid and I had to choose between then being out somewhere drinking or doing it in front of me, I’d pick the latter, but I don’t want either.

  • Why break the law for alcohol? the stuff is nasty (at least as far as a sample-cup of red wine counts for [consumed in a country where I was above the drinking age])

    Breaking the law for one is wrong. Drinking, while fine in moderation. is something I prefer not to do. With a family history of addiction, why take a chance?

  • No underage drinking is illegal. My parents gave me my first drink at 15 … needless to say I became an alcoholic by 16 and battled with alcohol for years afterwards!

  • I’m with the crowd that says no underage drinking. Period. What’s the point, really?

  • Drinking is a natural part of most cultures, not as in binge-drinking like in America, but at mealtimes and afterdinner, in celebration, and rituals. Only in America is the drinking age so high, and only in America is the death caused by alcohol rate so high. In other countries, adults teach their children how to drink responsibly. That’s the difference.

  • nah, cause if i my parents had let me drink when i was 17 i would have drank a litle too much.

  • I would think so

  • Teenagers shouldnt drink at all….but cmon. We all know so many of us do. I’m not gonna say I’ve never had a beer. I think anything you can do to keep drunk teens off the roads is a worth a shot.

  • My husband and I talked about this recently, thinking of how we might handle this type of situation when we have kids.  We figured a good policy would be to have 1-3 “get out of jail free cards” in which the kid could call us to have him/her picked up from a party or other place where he’d been drinking, no questions asked.  If it happened more than the predetermined number of times we’d sit down and talk to them about what was going on.

    I know I won’t be able to stop my children from dabbling in alcohol (I certainly will talk to them about it early on, though, or at least plan to).  But if they’re going to do it I at least want to be available to them to help make them be as safe about it as possible.

  • I don’t think that parents should ever provide beer but if they have a feeling that they may drink and they scold, then it is more tempting to go and do something dangerous (like drive). If they say they can do it but just not drive, that is a lot better and it teaches responsible drinking.

  • Yes…otherwise the parents are just denying the reality that teenagers are going to drink.

  • EVEN THOUGH if they don’t drink at all until 21 that’s even better. And getting drunk is never necassary….

  • Drinking and Driving can be caused by parents telling their children drinking is ok.

    My dad thinks it’s ok as long as it’s under his roof.

    I guess that’s better then under someone elses.

    Who knows?

  • I didnt drink underage and i certainly dont want my children doing it. I hope that i teach them to not drink, but if they do, drink responsibly.

  • Yes indeed!

    My mum found out on Thanksgiving that I occasionally drink while I’m away at college. I assured her that I only drink with people that I trust and that I never intend to get drunk. She knows she can trust me, and she allows me to drink around her. I don’t that often, though. The only time I drink with family present is at family gatherings. For example, I had red wine, white wine, and rum [not a lot of each, and I had them between long periods of time] on Christmas day. And my family was cool with it.

  • no, christ says to do all things in moderation

  • yes, but, I love Emjay1′s comment. That’s awesome

  • With the force of the heavens we must put all energy into keeping children from driving while drunk… wasting little energy requiring sobriety… lives will end because of the former, and the latter… it just doesn’t work.

    Discussions about drinking should focus on its detriment and dangers, on abstinence or at least moderation… and about not fearing the consequences too much for giving in… they should never feel too afraid to ask for a ride home from a sober parent. 

  • no, not smart.

  • Yes, because kids might drink and drive to avoid getting caught drinking in the first place. If you already know they’re drinking, then you eliminate the need to drive while drunk. It saves lives, it can save the kid from getting a DUI, and it saves the parent some worry, since you already know what they’re going to be doing.

  • no way. just put the fear of death/god into them when they’re young, & they’ll be scared damn near straight for a long time. ex: ME!

  • No, I don’t think it’s smart for parents to do that. 

    Frankly, I wouldn’t have rspected my parents if they had.  My parents were messed up but they didn’t want me to be.  At least I knew they thought enough of me that they didn’t want me to make stupid mistakes which often follow getting drunk when you are underage.

  • Mm…I don’t know. My dad lets me drink wine, and have the occasional sip of his beer…but its not like he just leaves me free to drink whatever I want.

  • If they are going to drink, I think that it is smarter for the parents to have the children to drink around/in front of them to make sure they don’t drink and drive.  I had some friends who parents would only let them drink when they were around, a form of supervision.  I think it’s a good idea.  You may not be able to stop them from doing it, but you can stop them from making a huge mistake and driving.

  • They shouldn’t be drinking under the age of 21 period. A good parent should ruthlessly enforce this rule.

  • Yes, I believe it is smarter.

  • Absolutely. My hubby’s parents let him have a sip of wine here and there growing up and he NEVER got drunk in HS. I have been married 8 years and have never seen him drunk.

  • YES!!!!!

    My parents allow me to drink as long as I ask for permission to drink and that my keys stay in the living room where my parents see them until I’m sober.   My parents introduced me to drinking when I was 12-ish and they did this so that my curiousity of alcohol wouldn’t eventually kill me in a car wreck when I got (or get) older. 

  • I’ve three children….one is 22 yrs old, one is 18 yrs old and one is 17 yrs old…. except for champagne on New Years Eve, none of them have had drinks in front of me….though we did have a pledge/pack/deal that if they were anywhere and had had drank too much to call, the Aussie and/or I would pick them up without any questions or lectures…it worked…though I don’t approve of drinking….they will do it….If I can’t be around, we give money for a cab and had a thought for our daughter that we would have a cab company that we would prepay to drive her, not only from parties but if she missed her ride to school….we’re trying to work that out……..interesting the things you come up with as they grow older….’til the next

  • Yes. Its a pain finding a ride home too, haha…Been through that a couple times + you gotta run upstairs..fast..

  • Yeah, thats what my moms approach is. She tells us the first time we drink, she wants to be there so we don’t do somethin’ stupid, like drink too much, or drink and drive.

  • it teaches a child responsibility and it shows the child that she/he is trusted. if they drink behind their parent’s back its likely to escalate and lead to a car crash or something.

    verdi

  • I agree that drinking underage shouldn’t be condoned, and parents certainly should NEVER supply alcohol to a teenager, but setting a rule like that helps to keep from having negative consequences. Saying “NO!” automatically makes the teenager want to defy. By trying to compromise “I know you’re going to drink, so I’m just going to ask that…” works much better. Teenagers are going to drink. It’s become a fact of life. Being responsible, though, is something that the parent can help with.

    I think that trying to create black and white boundaries when raising teenagers is the worst thing that a parent can do for some things. No alcohol. No drugs. Things like that have a tendency to create animosity toward rules, and toward parents. Being understanding about peer pressure and the like helps to create a more responsible teenager. Fear should not be used to keep someone from doing something.

    Just look at the statistics for abstinance-only education!!

  • i think it is the lesser of two evils.

    however i dont think it should be promoted at all. i dont think parents should drink. ever.

  • yes. Teens will always find a way to drink if they want to. It is better to have them under your eye then have the chance of them doing something they will truly regret, like driving and killing someone or getting into a major accident.

    GARY

  • No drinking at all.  I mean heck…what’s the point?  It tastes like crap anyways…half the time kids don’t like it.

  • Yes? I don’t know..

  • Yes, my mom raised me under the same philosophy that my grandparents raised her and her siblings. Whenever she wanted something to drink, they would give it to her (as long as she wasn’t going to go drive afterwards). If a teenager wants to drink, they are going to and they may be even more likely to if they’re parents are deadset against it.

  •      Wow that’s a hard call…i’m not a parent. I’m an underaged drinker which means my choices will be damning.
          i had a friend who was a mom and she let kids party at her house but she’d call and say: “There will be drinking at this party if you do not wánt your son or daughter to attend, then make sure they don’t come, because other wise i’m taking everyone’s car keys and they’ll sleep it off and can go home in the morning.” i thought this was a unique thing to do. 
         i suppose it depends: Why are we drinking? is it because of peer pressure, escape, enjoyment, doing something we know we’re not supposed to be doing? i think drinking because of peer pressure is an escape on many different levels. 
         What if i just concluded by saying that in some cases it is the lesser of two evils.

  • no…its an irresponsible thing to do on the parents part and it will only show them that underage drinking is okay…in my opinion its rediculous

  • Gosh no it is not okay to have anyone under age 21 drinking in your home. That’s illegal and you can’t keep your integrity in front of the kids by breaking the law.

    Some suggestions above sound pretty good and I may use them: The one where the father said he would pick up his kid with no questions asked, only a “discussion” in the morning, and no repercussions.

    My oldest child turned 17 today. I hope she would never drink beyond a few sips but that is probably unrealistic. I hate alcohol because I have only seen very bad things result from it. I don’t know how anyone avoids becoming addicted to it. Once you start, it turns on receptors in your brain that crave more. I have been snared in the grips of it in the past and I won’t touch it now. But God sees it differently. . . He says he gave us wine to “gladden our hearts.” So a few sips, and a glow, and not getting behind the wheel, may be okay for some (but I wouldn’t turn my receptors on, leave those babies off!) But God also gives warnings that it is debauchery to get drunk.

  • I didn’t drink until after I was 21.  It never appealed to me.  I had friends that drank, but I just didn’t.  I had one friend that used to tease me about it all the time.  It bothered me that he wouldn’t respect that I just didn’t want to.  One time he had a party at his house and he went to the fridge to get himself a beer and came back with a diet coke for me.  It was at that moment that I knew he finally respected my choice.  He then teased me to slow down on the diet cokes.  Ha ha, so funny.

    Now we do Shabbat with our girls.  While the baby is obviously too young for wine, I’m allowing my six year old to take a sip of the wine after the blessing.  After that she will have some sparkling grape juice or something.  I want to teach her that it’s nothing to be afraid of if treated with respect.  I have missionary friends who allowed their sons to have beer at a young age.  All of their boys are very well adjusted wonderful young men.  At fifteen years old they were casually sipping beer or wine with their parents at meal times.  I think a healthy respect for alcohol is good for kids.

  • I think it is bad to encourage kids to drink in the first place.

    Moreover, if my parents would have allowed me to drink in front of them, I would have thought it was lame and wouldn’t have wanted to do it.  Kind of like drinking lost its appeal when I turned 21.

    Erika

  • I think it is bad to encourage kids to drink in the first place.

    Moreover, if my parents would have allowed me to drink in front of them, I would have thought it was lame and wouldn’t have wanted to do it.  Kind of like drinking lost its appeal when I turned 21.

    Erika

  • i think there is a difference between drinking and being completely plastered. when i drink i am responsible and stay where i am at. i also don’t drink to the point to where i can’t control myself.
    Staci

  • Yes. Drinking isn’t such a big deal when it’s with your parents. I know from experience.

  • My mom lets me drink only with her, when we’re at home, and know we won’t be going anywhere for the night. Is it a good thing to do? Not really. However, now a days, teens drink all the time whether it’s supervised or not. I’ll admit, I do it.

  • yea

  • It may sound like the parent is being smart, but they are not.  They are encouraging underage drinking.  They are sending the wrong  signal to their teenager.   

  • i think if a parent is going to allow a teen to drink it really should be under supervision. one would hope that supervision would teach a little bit of self-control. i see far too many students whose idea of a good time is to go out on a thursday or friday and just get plastered. is thier life really that bad and the only way to escape is to get drunk. that is however, a completely different issue. within home+parental supervision=OK

  • Mothers like that one who left a group of kids at home alone with beer give mothers a bad rap.

    ((( GRANDMA HUGS )))

    Lori

  • um… i think it depends on how mature the kid is. you might just get him hooked and make him more likely to DUI.

  • yea. the kid won’t wnat to drink just to spite the parents then

  • im only 15 years old.. and my mom always told me that if I ever got drunk.. not to ride with anyone that’s drunk, and not to drive.. that she would come pick me up no questions asked, and she’d let it go since I was being responsible. But, I’ve never had to use this. I went through a “time” last year, when I was sneaking out all the time, etc.. And I don’t really think right now is the time to let someone my age drink, but I think there’s a certain point where you can realize your child is responsible enough, and will be put in the situation to drink.

  • I’d much prefer if my parents just allowed me to drink, being secretive is dangerous and a pain in the ass.
    I mean, I understand how allowing your child to drink could be a problem with some people, but I know I would be consious enough to know when drinking is becoming a problem.

  • It’s smarter, but only if the parent sets limits of course. Once the kids are older and have more experience they will know (and hopefully respect) their own limits without parental intervention.

  • No. I don’t drink never did, so I would do everything I could to keep my kids from drinking.

  • My parents would never have allowed me to drink with them when I was underage (although I do now that I’m 22, which is only quasi-weird), but my dad told me once that if I ever needed a ride from anywhere, to call him. I was never supposed to ride with a drunk driver, including parents of kids I was babysitting, etc.

    Most of the kids I knew who were allowed to drink with their parents drove drunk on a regular basis. I don’t think it helps.

  • Underage kids should not drink period.  It’s harmful to your body.  Too risky. 

  • Not if they are under age.  I woould have never allowed one of my kids friends to drink in my home.  However, I did let each of my sons have wine late at night at home when they were like 18. 

    Drinking and driving is taboo.  At 45 I don’t even have one drink out and drive home.  I just don’t do it.  However, my husband does not drink at all and is usually our designated driver for any of my friends and me.

  •  whats the point the drunken idiot wants to kill themselves the parents cant control their lives all the time

  • i think it is, but then again, i was raised in wisconsin where it’s legal to do so, so i was brought up thinking that that is a good idea. but, if one drinks with their parents, they could possibly think that their parents don’t care what, when and how much they drink and could lead them to make some other wrong decisions. however, a kid drinking with their parents can help them learn their limits in a safe way, with people they can trust….

    there are so many pros and cons to this question. it’s a tricky one…. very tricky…

  • Where does one draw the line?

    How much do you allow them to drink and what happens when they get drunk for the first time or sneak their friends in to drink?

    Some kids will abuse that freedom then what?

    I have always had mixed feeling on the subject.

    I am a mom to three teenage boys and it is quite the chore to teach them to be responsible.

    My rule is anything more than two of anything is excessive.

  • No. You are teaching you child that it is okay to break the law if mom and dad say it is okay. It is also somewhat of a fatalistic attitude…my kid is going to dink so I should make sure they are safe when they do so. The same attitude prompts parents to say “don’t have sex, but of you do use a condom and your bedroom for sex”. That way you will be safe while you are engaging in that behavior.

    This certainly shows little respect for our children in that we expect them to disobey and not to be able to control themselves from engaging in sex and/or drinking. It does show them that we care about their physical well being, but it also lets them know that we do not believe those behaviors to be extremely dangerous or immoral.

  • I think so. I’ve been to peoples houses where the parents don’t care if we drink and it it’s actually pretty cool. We don’t have to worry about how were going to get home and what will happen if we caught by the cops. It’s much better than drinking out on the side of the street hiding beer in your pocket everytime a car drives by…..

    ————–

    Wow, when you were 16 you only got buzzed? I feel like a very bad boy.

  • Whenever I would drink at my friends house, my friends mom would take everyones keys away from them and make them sleep over. It was fine by me. I thought that was pretty cool. She was pretty easy going about that kind of stuff, but no smoking. She would even drink with us, man what a cool mom. Designated drivers work too.

  • Drinking is stupid and makes you stupid.  I will never drink.  or take drugs.  or have sex.

    I will no doubt have a boring life.

    hahahaha

  • My parents did that somewhat…it was basically limited to New Year’s Eve, and only at home.  The other 364 days of the year they made it clear that drinking was not an option whatsoever else face stiff punishment.  lol

  • hi~ I like what you’ve been writing :)

    I think it’s about the trust between each other and self control.

  • Neither really, but you know they are going to do it no matter what, so I would much rather them be safe at home.

  • hmmm…I’m looking at my step children as an example and I would have to say….NO WAY. The rule is don’t drink. If you drink, there are consequences. It’s way easier for me to say, If you drink I’ll kick your ass.

  • I think so.  We allow my brothers to drink when they are with us.

  • My father started out letting me have some alcohol when I was 16. He was always present and it would be something like him putting some jack daniel’s in my coke for dinner or something. Because of that, drinking was not “cool” or “rebellious” to me. It was something I did at home when I was hanging out with my family. I think my father’s backwards wisdom really helped me out!

  • Unfortunately every person is still going to eventually have his or her first ytime to get wasted and get sick, even if he’s had experience with alcohol before.  Drinking under supervision at home may even give him a false sense of security, like “Ik now how to handle my liquor so I don’t have to worry about it.”

    I never drank untill right around high school graduation.  The first several times that I did I was good, without getting overly drunk.  Then I got cocky about it and got completely wasted while visiting a friend at her school.  I was sick for 3 days.  Then again, getting that bad made it so I couldn’t touch alcohol for 6 months so perhaps that was a good thing…. 

    It’s probably more importnant to impress on the teen to always have a trusted friend who’ll remain somewhat sober when going out drinking– you need someone who can take care of you if you need it.  That will be more helpful than experimenting with alcohol at home first, I think.

  • absolutely!!!!!!!!!

  • I think that letting them drink before they are 21 is telling them that they don’t have to follow the law. I drank alot before I was 21, I never drank and drove. Some of my friends did, most of those were the ones who’s parents allowed them to drink. No, it is never okay to tell your children that they don’t have to obey the law, in the end all you are saying is that they only have to follow the rules they feel like.

  • well I definetly live in a town where almost every teenager drinks on the weekends. I must say that it is a lot better when the parent says you can drink, just not at home. This avoids not only the chance of drinking while under the influence but if the child is home they also cannot cause any property damage or anythingelse illegal. Also, it keeps the child away from the bad choices that he/she could make while at a party.

  • YES LET THEM DO IT IN FRONT OF YOUR FACE RATHER THAN BEHIND YOUR BACK

  • I am 18. I have never had more then a sip of a drink. My dad is the one who gave me the sips. I just plain don’t like the taste of alcohol. Also I think the most important thing is to instill a respect for drinking at a young age. That’s what my parents did. If they offered me a glass of wine at dinner while I was home over break…I most likely would have said “sure” but I wouldn’t drink much. The point is the respect. By the age of 7 or 8 both me and my little sister knew several types of liquor, how much to pour and a bunch of other stuff because we were my dad’s little servants(in a fun way). Respect is the way to go. My parents told me that if I ever went to a party and got drunk, they would pick me up. I’d get in trouble, but I think I’d be sensible enough to do that. I’m in college now and I don’t drink, most of my friends don’t drink, so it is possible. RESPECT for drinking is key.

  • It’s against the law. If you want to teach your children that it is okay to break the law, then sure, you should allow them to drink in your home. But, and there is always a but, if they broke the law and drank at someone’s house, I would rather that they called for a ride home, not spend the night personally. Who knows what else could happen?
    We just plan on trying for it to be a non issue…like, oh definitely you can drink when you are 21 or something like that.

  • I agree with Emjay1 completely, and my father told me the exact same thing.

    I don’t think it is smart for anyone to engage in an illegal activity, such as providing alcohol to a minor(s). I don’t think it will cut down on the amount of drinking and driving either. Sometimes I have to go pick up a friend from the bars here in town, and there are cars parked everywhere. Those people drove to the bar, I’m sure they expect to drive home too at some point.

    Let’s just teach our children that the law doesn’t apply to them. That is smart.

  • I dont’ think underage drinking is a good thing, but let’s face it.  It is gonna happen most likely.  So, yes, I would much rather the kid drink it in my household and not drive than do it behind my back and drive.

  • Yeah… kids that are aloud to do things like that in moderation aren’t as likely to rebel and end up in lots of trouble.

  • yes I think so but I don’t agree with it

  • its certainly more realistic for the way kids are these days.

  • Don’t let them drive drunk if you can help it – any way you can.

    L,r

  • I think it’s always smart for a parent to teach a child everything they can, set them off in the right direction, and then to understand that everything is a whole lot safer for all parties involved if the child is doing whatever it may be in front of their back rather than behind their back. 

  • That is part of the dang problem with the youth of today. Parents are too busy trying to be their kids best friends and not their parent!  You can’t allow your children to break the law and expect them to grow up to be good citzens. Sure some kids are going to do it but a parent has to be strong and set guide lines and rules. I cannot stand this new trend for parents to let their kids do whatever they want to do. You ARE NOT their friend be a parent and teach them right from wrong so they can teach it to their kids!

  • I personally think that I would rather know they are drinking, know where they are and who with, and how they are getting home, rather than having no idea…. in general most teenagers are going to drink if they want… no matter what you say. So when my daughter gets there, when she wants to drink, my first line of defense is going to get her smashing drunk and hope she pukes for 3 days… to deter… but after that, I want her to be able to call me if she needs me… I don’t want her afraid of being in trouble if she calls me drunk…. my parents would’ve killed me, but its a miracle I’m still alive anyway!!

  • Depends on the kid. With Ace we are going to have to hold the line, I imagine. She is so carefree and impulsive, I’m not sure that she’d abide by a “drink but no driving” kind of rule. Other kids seem to handle this issue more maturely. I don’t have a problem with parents who allow their kids to drink a little early. Sometimes the temptation is much greater if something is totally denied to someone and their curiosity is great. I’m not saying that underage drinking is acceptable as a norm. Perhaps an introduction to alcohol in a controlled situation is better than the into in an uncontrolled situation.

  • I think so because if they try it in a safe place they won’t feel the need to go out and drink and get drunk.

  • I think so because if they try it in a safe place they won’t feel the need to go out and drink and get drunk.

  • I don’t drink, and I don’t plan on ever drinking. I won’t tell my kids that they CANNNOT drink, but I will ask them that if they do drink they don’t drive, and that they call me if they have drank anything.

  • Underage drinking is illegal, I think. Anyways, I don’t drink– YET. I don’t plan to in the future, actually.

    I’m not a party girl, and I think I would rather be doing something else and drinking something else then alcohol, or whatever.

    But I’m just a child. lol. I haven’t grow up yet. O

  • I think the drinking in front of your parents is smart, though.  But I don’t plan to drink, because I’m kind of strict to religion.

  • not as much fun….not that i would know…seriously.
    i dont like alcohol!

  • :sigh:
    I hold out hope for prohibition

  • I think that you should have that policy or something similar to keep your kid (if you have one) from drinking. Keep fear absolutely out of the equation if your truly concerned about being the one they turn to in a time in need. The same should apply to all intoxicants your child might get mixed up in. I would rather they came to me for help than anyone else, so the door would always be open and hopefully the trust never lost.

  • That’s what my grandma did with my mom.

  • I am 18. I have never had more then a sip of a drink. My dad is the one who gave me the sips. I just plain don’t like the taste of alcohol. Also I think the most important thing is to instill a respect for drinking at a young age. That’s what my parents did. If they offered me a glass of wine at dinner while I was home over break…I most likely would have said “sure” but I wouldn’t drink much. The point is the respect. By the age of 7 or 8 both me and my little sister knew several types of liquor, how much to pour and a bunch of other stuff because we were my dad’s little servants(in a fun way). Respect is the way to go. My parents told me that if I ever went to a party and got drunk, they would pick me up. I’d get in trouble, but I think I’d be sensible enough to do that. I’m in college now and I don’t drink, most of my friends don’t drink, so it is possible. RESPECT for drinking is key.
    Posted 1/19/2006 at 9:11 AM by Eternally_questioning

    My thoughts exactly.

  • Yes, my parents do that and I’ve never driven while intoxicated.

  • don’t let them drink period.

  • kids are naturally curious about such things…and believe me, they will find a way to drink if you dont let them.  in my opinion its better to know where they are and how much they consume, therefore ruling out drunken driving and alcohol poisoning.

  • I allowed mine to try it at home.  One had just eaten a big meal and drank two beers and was throwing up off our front porch, needless to say he decided right then and there he wanted no part of it as he did the same with skoal…..lol  I have a very open and honest relationship with my children, I would much rather them try it at home and know what it’s like as try it at a party for the first time and get into trouble or worse.  Mine are 16 and 14 and I am very thankful for the relationship I have with them.  I have always been an involved parent and that is why we have the relationship we have.

    DD

  • It’s one thing to allow your children to drink in the home or even among family (maybe to build/develop an healthy respect for the activity). But to allow OTHER people’s children to drink in your home (especially if you, the adult, are not going to be present) is just irresponsible.

  • Neither the child nor the parent should drink alcohol. Parents should not appear to be supportive of drinking in general.

  • Thats how I feel 2.

  • how about not having them drink.

  • You know, it’s tricky. In high school, I had a friend whose mom would let us drink in the basement so long as we stayed there and gave her our car keys. She let us camp out there all night and would sometimes bring us muffins in the morning. Things never got out of hand. It We were going to do it regardless, and it was good to have a safe place to do so.

  • What it is smarter to do is to make your kids obey the laws of the land.  If the drinking age is 18 or under, then yes, I believe it would be the right thing to do.  But as in America, the age is 21, and most folks are out of the house by that time.  It would be kinda like saying “sure, son, you can do pot as long as I’m here to make sure you don’t overdo it”  That is just as illigal, and just as wrong.

  • You shouldn’t let your children drink in genral. Isn’t it bad for liver development?

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