November 27, 2006
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Women Talking
Women talk almost three times as much as men. All of this is according to a woman psychiatrist named Dr. Luan Brizendine. Here is the link: Link
Why do women talk so much?
Women talk almost three times as much as men. All of this is according to a woman psychiatrist named Dr. Luan Brizendine. Here is the link: Link
Why do women talk so much?
Comments (172)
because we value communication.
I sure don’t. Don’t ask me.
we’re so good at it =]
Because there’s so many things going through our heads that it’s got to leak out sometime…
*verbal communication.
Because most of us live with men that don’t fucking listen in the first place.
cause they like to argue.
Women communicate. Men don’t.
I’m a woman, so… I don’t know for sure, but it seems like men’s goals center more around personal success. Women measure success differently. They think that having lots and lots of good relationships constitutes a successful life. Men… don’t necessarily think so. (shrug) So women find it more important to communicate. Thus, mucho talkage.
I talk a lot to avoid awkward silences… men tend to just let them come, maybe it doesn’t bother men as much?
Because men don’t remember anything unless we repeat it a thousand times.
13 times 3 does not equal 20…this is A HOAX!
is it just me or is 20 thousand not 3x 13 thousand???
Anyhoo… it’s cuz women have more opinions of everything. We feel we need to prove everything, or recollect our whole day.
I hope you didn’t major in Math, Dan, because 20,000 is definitely not 3 times as much as 13,000. But I won’t hold it against you.
Who knows why we talk so much more. I really don’t talk half as much as most of my friends, but we do find alot to obsess over in our small worlds.
No idea.
I heard a joke about this.
A woman is talking to her husband and reads an article saying that women talk twice as much as men. She reads it outloud to her husband. Her husband goes, “Why is that?”
She says, “Because women have to repeat everything twice for men.”
Her husband says, “What?”
I dunno, I know plenty of women who don’t talk alot unless they have something to say.
Maybe some women just feel more of a need to get their point accross.
Guys use force, women use words?
Women talk more becuase they have 2x the number of lips men have, which allows for more talk. Also men are to busy thinking about sex to talk!
Though i actually read that men talk only to communicate information
while women talk to build friendships and bond.
You should compare comment length between guys and girls on this post.
Women think out loud as they talk, while men think in their head and then speak. At least that’s what that fucker from “Men Are From Mars Women From Venus” book writes.
Women may talk more then men but we both say the same thing, just differently…
Because that’s how we communicate?
I read somewhere that men cannot concentrate on the sound of a woman’s voice for a long period of time without exerting a good deal of energy and concentration because of the pitch of a woman’s voice. So maybe we talk more because we have to say everything several times before it sticks?
I wonder if that counts the fact that they talk with their hands
culture tells men it’s macho to talk less. talking too much is seen as feminine.
I lean more towards introverted tendencies, so I think things through very carefully before I say them. People tell me that when I say things they are often very clear and don’t really require any extra explanation or commentary. I know that not all men are like this, but a lot of the guys I know are a bit more like this and a lot of women I know tend to ramble some. I don’t know if this explains it at all, but it is merely my attempt to answer the question.
And.. how is that three times as much? Am I missing something?
how is 13,000 one third of 20,000?
We talk more because most of us like to know other people’s businesses and the only way for that to happen is through communication. Men are happy as long as you notice them once in a while.
I don’t know why they talk so much, but it’s obvious that doing so doesn’t allow for the proper building up of pressure that is needed to fart… and that would at least explain something about us guys.
I’ve heard the opposite but I definitley say that women talk more because they’re better communicators…yet in my classes, the guys talk more than the girls.
HA! see, now it’s scientifically proven! lol jk
To wear men down to the point that we don’t have the strength to protest when they come in from the store with 5 pairs of essentially identical shoes.
I think women are wired that way.
We have more to say, probably.
Because women seem to find more to talk (read: gossip) about.
uhh i don’t.
maybe other girls do it since they don’t have anything better to do.
now, perhaps, math isn’t your strong suit. wanna fix those numbers there?
because i’m important
And by the way, the article said women talked 13,000 more words a day than men. Just to clear that up. It’s not 13,000 words a day for men. That would be too much. Heehee. More like 7,000 words a day for them.
Because we’re more important. Duh.
If I didn’t repeat the same story or request 10 times to a guy, it won’t stick in his head. Therefore, we talk out of pure necessity because guys are idiots.
Because they’re not busy thinking about sex all the time.
Maybe cuz women have something to say? idk it depends on the person..
I don’t think I talk that much compared to most women though so ..yeah
In my experience, males are more to-the-point. We can be saying similar things, but we get it done in less words.
Well, the Gospel says, “From the abundance of the heart, the mouth speaks.”
I think women just have a soul that needs to be expressed in more ways, more frequently. I think that such a nature is quite beautiful. Not that men have less of a soul, they just have less of a need to express it perhaps. But I don’t pretend to know human nature, so don’t take my word on this one!
We have to talk three times as much because men only listen to 1/3 of what we say so we have to say it three different ways to get to you understand it and react….plus we explain things better. When a amn gives directions he will say, just go down that road and then take a left then right and then right again and your there….but when a woman gives directions she will say: Take the freeway 175 miles to Centerville and then go left at the 410 Loop, then take the first right at exit 22 which is landmarked by a giant statue of Beethoven, the cartoon dog, not the composer, then drive 40 miles past 6 small towns and 21 intersections and turn right again onto Glamour Parkway and the building your looking for is at the dead end, it is red brick 3 story and you can get directions to the appropriate office from the secretary, her name is Janice and she is single so wear a nice shirt.
Now, honestly, which would you rather get directions from? A Man or a Woman?
20,000 is less than twice as much as 13,000. Come on I’m tired and trying to do college essays and still caught that!
thats not what she says.
she says (quote article)
with the average woman chalking up 20,000 words in a day – 13,000 more than the average man
meaning, the average woman says 13,000 more words than teh ave man…
not what you said…
We have more and better things to say, of course. Socially apt, better at conversation, etc. etc.
its that men don’t talk enough.
we’re making up for all those years we were silenced for.
Because men don’t remember anything unless we repeat it a thousand times.
Posted 11/27/2006 at 9:55 PM by Super_Piggie
Exactly!!!
Because we overprocess every little thing…out loud…I know that’s why I talk so much.
It is like training a parrot, you need to repeat yourself endlessly until he finally get it.
It’s innate. You can see it from the time talking begins. Little girls also talk more than little boys. The female brain is more geared towards language skills, the male brain toward spatial.
because we have so much to say and so little time to say it!!
That explains a lot. I talk like crazy and I feel pretty gay acting sometimes.
Men talk too much too!
i know a lot of boys who talk more than girls!
13X3 does not equal 20, but 20 is about 3 times as much as 7, and the difference is 13.
Here’s a joke: A man runs over his wife while riding his motorcycle. Whose fault is it?
…
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…
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Answer: The man, since he shouldn’t have been riding his motorcycle in the kitchen.
We want to be heard.
or, you know, at least listened to.
They have more to say.
to try and make med deaf, or so they die quicker
Why do men talk so little?
Men actually listen to half of what they hear, so women have to repeat what they say. And plus, women have a more active part of the brain that is vocal and dynamic.
Me: Hey Robert (my brother), d’you know that guys listen to only half of what they hear?
Robert: What?
Because they have something to say that’s worth hearing.
Aaaaaannnndddd…..so do some men. Just being fair.
I’m not sure.
We go to the bathroom in groups usually to talk about you males.
It’s all your fault!
No idea
If by mentioning the fact that the professional who stated this fact is a woman, there are men who say the same.
“Other scientists, however, are sceptical about the effects of testosterone on the brain and say many of the differences between the male and female personality can be explained by social conditioning, with a child’s upbringing greatly influencing their character.”
Many of the differences are due to gene-environment interactions termed canalization. But Brizendine sounds like and evolutionist — that women were more likely to develop verbal skills as they cooperated in the camps and collection of huts/caves and the men were out hunting. Very Darwinist in origin.
Socially, female children are encouraged to express their emotions, to talk about them, and such. Male children however are told not to be so expressive, but rather “act like a man” which our particular society has made them less nuturant. It varies by culture, there are tribal cultures in which boys and girls are raised exactly the same: to be as nuturant and expressive. It depends upon one’s up-bringing, and temperament plays a role as well. For example, I may type a lot online, but in person I certainly do not talk as much. I am a more quiet, serious personality where observation and listening take precedence over speech.
Men don’t have to use as many words because we think before we speak.
(I’M JUST JOKING).
Because men don’t.
Actually I think it has more to do with women being more “relational” creatures than men are. We relate through words.
Because we’re social beings by nature.
Generally I think women are more into communication and relationships. Not that men do not value these things, but I tend to see that women are more likely to seek them out and participate in them more frequently(sometimes, ALL the time..) I know the number one thing in my life is relationships. And, the thing I do the most throughout the day is communicate. Whether I am talking in person, on the phone, in a letter, on an email, a fax, a text, etc etc.. It’s always communication and being in corespondence SOMEHOW with another person. It’s not something I think about, it’s just built into me.. As, I think it is with most women..
All that say, I really don’t know why.. I think we WANT to do it more, we FEEL like we have more things to say, and we’re PROGRAMED to.
I think women are more emotionally open and willing to share their feelings
Hogwash.
We have more to say? I don’t know. I don’t think I talk all that much, myself… but maybe that’s because I’m looking at me from the wrong view point.
We’re verbal, social beings. We had to communicate with the other women in the clans to figure out how to collect the best berries and take care of our kids. Men just had to grunt and catch big animals.
my dh talks more than me. he’s extrovert….i’m introvert. i do like to talk, but only when i know what i’m saying. otherwise i like to keep my mouth shut. he’ll just say anything and sometimes look stupid. he’s not, he’s just very chatty. lol
Because when a man grunts, it is immediately understood by the surrounding males. Women, however, find a grunt somewhat lacking, and feel better expressed and understood when they can explain in several words what they are thinking or feeling. What do I think about that? Ugh!
You know, I used to not talk a lot…making me not such a typical girl…now I realise…I TALK ALL THE TIME!! At least to my friends…not usually to strangers…I don’t know why she talk so much…we’re just wired to do it.
I don’t talk as much as most women. It’s annoying.
HA well, I could give you the typical “because men don’t show emotion, they don’t speak their feelings, they don’t value communication” but in all honesty Dan, I talk ALL the time! I like a funny story, or a good conversation, or a heated debate. But just like that typical male answer, I don’t talk emotion or feelings. Feminine/Macho means nothing. so in all honesty I can’t tell you. But I do know I have met some men that talk just as much if not more than me
Have a great night
SAM
PS I just noticed: that spilled coffee cup on your background, is that supposed to be a “picture” of Jesus or am I just seeing things?
We’re more socially advanced?
We have more intelligent things to say?
Verbal competence. Guys just don’t have it.
I talk 10X more then my bf. I just can’t seem to shut up, especially when I’ve been drinking. Oy.
some of us don’t. a lot of times I really hate talking.
because it takes that many extra words to explain to man, what a woman would grasp in two or three words.
Shalom!
That’s actually not a fact. The way my professor teaches it in my sociology classes, women DO talk more in same sex situations than men do when in the company of other men.
BUT in co-ed gatherings, men are more dominant in the conversation, talking much more than women and interrupting others more.
In homosocial situations, it’s just more acceptable for women to talk more, not in quanity, but in context, i.e. emotions and personal thoughts. Men and women also bond over different arenas. For men, it’s usually an arena that doesn’t require conversation like sports.
We gossip, full detailed, & we want more info!
because men know when to shut up
Oh crap, I forgot to put the trash out by the curb and the garbage man just passed my house! Dammit!
I guess we just have a lot to say…
XxooxX
Jane
Maybe women just have more to say.
I’d rather hear women talk about the most unnecessary things than hear MEN talk about nothing but football.
Because when women don’t talk, something is automatically “wrong with them”.
Yes, I agree with all those little brilliant girls out there, it is hard for men to understand the human language. This is why Eistein, Newton, Shakespear, Socratese, Watts, Plato, Kelvin, and pretty much every single person to make a breakthrough in the way humans understand the way things work and the way things are, are all women. I am so glad women have been breaking through the boundries of human understanding, because men can’t even understand anything without being told by a woman ten times.
> Because they have more trauma, if not more drama, in their lives and so….
Peace
“BUT in co-ed gatherings, men are more dominant in the conversation, talking much more than women and interrupting others more.” — CosmicCastaway
TRUE. Jesus. If Sam interrupts me one more time when I’m trying to talk to someone, I’m dumping ice down his pants. And it isn’t that he interrupts when I’m getting chatty, because I am a very quiet person in social environments. Rawr.
because men are ‘action’, while women are ‘wisdom’.
men are like diamonds – they shine for their own sake.
women are like lotus flowers – they embrace everything around.
men make wars, they destroy and conquer.
women love, heal and soothe.
at least this is the way I see it.
take care,
Mila.
This guy heard these stats one day, and could hardly wait to tell his wife. When he did, she thought about it. Then she said well, no wonder women talk so much. They have to repeat everything to their husbands! Guess what he said? he said, “What did you say?”
I don’t know why either..hmm i hardly talk much though..ummm
because they need to repeat everything they say to their men two times, for them to understand.
Yes, I agree with all those little brilliant girls out there, it is hard for men to understand the human language. This is why Eistein, Newton, Shakespear, Socratese, Watts, Plato, Kelvin, and pretty much every single person to make a breakthrough in the way humans understand the way things work and the way things are, are all women. I am so glad women have been breaking through the boundries of human understanding, because men can’t even understand anything without being told by a woman ten times.
Posted 11/28/2006 at 2:17 AM by jonyon
I’ll ignore your grammatical errors (Firefox 2.0 will point them out for you, by the way) and give you this:
Behind every great man, there is a woman.
becoz women dont know what else they could do. they were born to talk*
no offence.
I dunno. But it’s true. Men are happier to do things without talking – just being with someone, drinking with them in a pub, for example, will count as bonding. Women have to talk to consolidate it.
I don’t think it really applies to writing, for some reason. I write a lot, and yet I am quite a quiet person verbally.
Because we have to repeat everything to men…..
Not all women do……
I’m more likely to write a lot than to talk a lot. And when I do talk, my husband usually interrupts me anyway. I kinda like the ice in the pants thing…hmmmm
Because we can
If women talked as much as they need to stay in the kitchen……
Because I have so much to say
if a woman talks in the forest and no one is around, does she make a sound? If a man talks in the forest and no women are around, is he still wrong?
if a woman talks in the forest and no one is around, does she make a sound? If a man talks in the forest and no women are around, is he still wrong?
I’ve been accused of being “standoffish” because I don’t talk enough. I know there are women out there who sound like hens clucking all the time. One friend would not stop talking because she couldn’t stand the silence. Personally, I don’t think anyone needs to waste words. I prefer talking one to one, rather than having a bunch of people going all at the same time.
Because we’ve got so much to say, of course! lol
Women put a lot more detail in their conversations, I think.
for some reson they feel the need to share every last thing that goes on in their lives, men dont.
as my dad says
“women use up to 0398402398 words a day. men use 309840. by time men get home…they’ve spent all thier words. the women still have 40980958 to go. thats why men are always like ‘huh,yea,grunt’ “
hah.
i have a question about a new topic.
theres a big controversy about this one lady hanging a peace sign wreath b/c her nieghbors say its anti-war/satanic.
the lady says that its nothing to do with the war. its more of a spiritual thing.
can you support the war and peace at the same time?
[ i believe you can....peace is a spritual thing.]
women base everything on relationships and so we talk more building into those relationships
Men like their silent communications.
Ha! Not in our house! You should see the hours clocked by K on the phone to his mother, sisters or best friend! They can talk for hours! (and they live within 15 minutes of each other!)
Not so with me and the girls! We are hardly ever on the phone!
I guess our brains are wired that way. It’s not necessarily better or worse. There’s probably a good bit of social conditioning in that too.
Maybe they notice more things and have more to comment about?
Because we deal with children and men – both of which have a tendency not to listen (or pretend not to listen) and we have a need to be heard. The last 10 years of my dad’s life – he had a hearing problem and refused to get a hearing aid – He said he didn’t know if he wanted to hear all that was going on – LOL. He lived in a house full of women.
I was told not to comment…
The question is not why women talk so much, but why men don’t.
Women talk
That’s worse then writing with chalk
Because a board can be erased.
But gab gab gab can drive you
mad mad mad.
Make you act bad bad bad.
Or get you sad sad sad.
Nag nag nag.
But then you see the dog–you hear it’s bark bark bark
You don’t even understand the “words” it “speaks”
But when you see its tail
wag wag wag.
You don’t mind. You’re willing to face the talking grind.
I don’t – I’m the quiet mysterious type.
Some good points in these comments. I think it’s simply a difference in communication. And I don’t think the stereotype holds true even most of the time, but anyway. I know I use words to communicate all the time and I know my husband uses actions to communicate all the time. If I want to communicate that I love him, I say, “I love you. I love you because ________.” And I give him a hug. If he wants to communicate the same thing, he’ll say “I love you” sometimes, but he communicates that love to me for…I don’t know…hours on end. He fixes stuff, he organizes a closet, he goes to work even when he hates it because we need the money, he takes the baby off my hands for a few minutes, he tells me something to make me laugh. We both say “I love you” but he does it differently.
~Victoria
There are a few guys I know of that talk at least twice as much as most girls that I know of. No, the guys I am thinking of aren’t feminine at all orangefiend. They’re into sports and arcade games, and have more than enough friends of both genders.
-Jessica
There are physiological differences between men and women that can account for this. If I remember my anatomy and physiology correctly, the corpus callosum, which connects both sides of the brain, is larger in women than it is in men. This makes it easier for the two sides of the brain to communicate and for women to express themselves more than men are able to do. That’s just a physiological explanation. A psychological explanation might be that society has shaped humans to communicate the way they do…with women expected to be the more nurturing counterpart (and thus more talkative) and the man expected to be the working provider (oftentimes away from home for extended periods)…these roles help define the communication patterns one might exhibit.
I imagine if my picture didn’t show up next to this comment, you’d probably assume I am female because of the long-windedness of it. Hehe. You’re right.
omg. my dad reads me Dave Berry’s blog everyday…that’s on there! i love it all….
-Joanna
I DON’T KNOW!!!
I don’t know, but I know I am one of the ones that talk alot, LOL
Because most of us live with men that don’t fucking listen in the first place.
Posted 11/27/2006 at 9:52 PM by SeafoamMermaid22
Agreed!!!!
Because we are constantly talking to dumb men.
I even talk to the toilet….I just talk,i need prozac!
Perhaps, contrary to popular wisdom, women are inefficient communicators.
dunno but the chicks I talk to don’t evar talk … when I’m around that is
me thinks they are just shy…
who said it’s too much?
Is it to drown out the voices in their heads…?
There’s so much to talk about!
i don’t. i kind of wish i did.
guys don’t mind silence
they don’t feel the need to say everything they think…let things slide
It’s fun
-KrIsTiN-
because men only listen about a third of the time?
((kidding))
Women are usually more verbal. Duh. We value communication, our brains are wired for language, we just can’t help it, we can’t stop talking….
When they talk, they talk on far more levels. I was in a conversation with my fellow Opinion writer and my Opinion editor, both women, and- Dear, God! -they were picking up on all these subtle hints and undertones. It was madness.
we have more to say?
Most men try to stay conscise. Every word makes towards the end, then you do something else.
Some women, on the other hand, have a tendency to pick just a few more words to….edge across some meaning that really, without all the excess explinations, commas and dot-dot-dots could really just have stayed conscise. But in the process, you hear more from them…how they shape ideas into words, things that they bring from the past into their conversations….it shows you more of who they are. They feel that with more words, whether it steers them further away from the point of the conversation or not, they can ellict a seperate response or understanding as to why that person would ramble on in some new direction, and what it means to them as people living right now.
Then, more talking. And more, and more and more….
Some people can take it, others can’t. It’s not neccessarily a female/male thing as much as it is mindset.
because they have nothing else to do so that just talk all the time
I don’t want to go make generalizations, despite statistics.
maybe they’re thinking out loud? i actually have no idea.
women are more emotional due to hormones. i’ve come to realize talking does release stress that we carry around & it makes us feel as if a huge weight has been lifted off our shoulders. & talking also occurs a lot because women like to gossip. guys don’t because their drama is about sports or something. women have their own problems
i thought long and hard about this..
well except for the “long and hard part”..
i don’t know …
We talk alot to learn about other people’s business. Men don’t care enough. A man can be with a person for hours and not know a single thing about him/her. We can learn the person’s life story in just a couple of minutes. That’s just how we are.
Men also value silence more, while we can’t stand it.
okay, for those of you who are kinda slow, the article says women say 20,000 words in a day – 13,000 MORE than the average man… 20,000-13,000=7,000… 7,000×2=21,000… round-about, women speak three times as much…
It puts heroine in their brains. I heard that on Fox and Friends.
So much hot air
Cuz they have to remind the men what to do next, non stop!
BECAUSE THEY HAVE MORE INTELLEGENT THINGS TO SAY
because i can dammit! (and yes i do, i love to talk, and it drives my sweetie insane, especially if he is watching tv….)
because we have so much to say =P
It’s genetic, hahaha. It seems that even baby girls talk more than baby boys. It’s just the way God made us I guess. Men go out and play basketball or box to let off steam…women talk. The difference between men and women.
because men don’t listen so women are forced to repeat themselves.
because women find more pleasure in the little talk…”how was your day….” etc, where as men are just content to leave it silent. Only women think it is awkward. Also…there is scientific backupo that women get happy chemicals from chatting. (THIS is why women go to the bathroom in pairs…) Men don’t…
Maybe we should ask ourselves…why do men like video games so much? Or belching contests? Or FOOTBALL? (my main ? is the last one but I wanted to soften the blow of the stereotype I was gonna throw up.)
because women find more pleasure in the little talk…”how was your day….” etc, where as men are just content to leave it silent. Only women think it is awkward. Also…there is scientific backupo that women get happy chemicals from chatting. (THIS is why women go to the bathroom in pairs…) Men don’t…
Maybe we should ask ourselves…why do men like video games so much? Or belching contests? Or FOOTBALL? (my main ? is the last one but I wanted to soften the blow of the stereotype I was gonna throw up.)
because women find more pleasure in the little talk…”how was your day….” etc, where as men are just content to leave it silent. Only women think it is awkward. Also…there is scientific backupo that women get happy chemicals from chatting. (THIS is why women go to the bathroom in pairs…) Men don’t…
Maybe we should ask ourselves…why do men like video games so much? Or belching contests? Or FOOTBALL? (my main ? is the last one but I wanted to soften the blow of the stereotype I was gonna throw up.)
we feel the need to explain ourselves properly so that we can sound smarter than men =D
We ‘d have to get into neuro and behavioural science to explain the phenomenal gender distinguishment.
because men dont listen