March 23, 2007
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Banning Myspace
A school in Michigan has banned the use of myspace. They not only banned it from being used on school property. They banned it from use at home. The students and their parents will have to sign an Internet policy that bans myspace. The policy is called “Think First, Stay Safe.” (When they give it such a catchy name, it makes it so much easier for the students). Here is the link: Link
The youth minister at my church banned the students from using myspace. He sent a letter home to the parents telling them the dangers of myspace. The parents applauded his bold move. All the kids have new accounts now. I see them on myspace all the time. I don’t know if the parents or the youth minister know they have them. But they openly post pictures of youth activities. In fact, I saw that the youth minister’s son has one.
Can you really ban the use of myspace?
Comments (208)
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You can strongly encourage people not to use it, but it’s the decision of the children or teens. The parents have the right to ban it, but I know several people that were banned from using it but still have accounts…
Well, you know what they say…
you have to want to ban it.
I think you can certainly TRY to ban it, but a determined child will find a way. I don’t think myspace is the problem though.
I hate to use such sad examples for Myspace, but.. the first thing I thought of is abortion/prostuition. You can ban both them if you want to, make them illegal, and though that will keep a lot of people out of it, if someone REALLY wants to do it they are going to find a way. I think that’s how it is in our generation with kids and the internet. They can be banned and restricted, but internet access is absolutely anywhere and everywhere.. It’s easy and it’s simple.. If the kids want a darn myspace, I have a feeling they are going to find a way to have one. (though the central idea is a good one.)
That was me, btw!…On the wrong user… Anyway, I think it’s stupid to ban Myspace. What harm can it do to somebody? Besides, it’s not the schools business if a child gets raped by a paedophile. Though I think posting photos of people in youth activities ain’t so good. You shouldn’t put your photo on the internet…
That was me, btw!…On the wrong user… Anyway, I think it’s stupid to ban Myspace. What harm can it do to somebody? Besides, it’s not the schools business if a child gets raped by a paedophile. Though I think posting photos of people in youth activities ain’t so good. You shouldn’t put your photo on the internet…
This is the equivalent of simply saying DON’T HAVE SEX!!!! with no other precautions or explanations to the kids themselves. Which means that when they sneak around everyone;s backs to use myspace anyway, they won’t be properly educated about how best to take care of themselves and just be safe.
It would be better for parents and schools to hand out guidelines of what kinds of activites are and aren’t safe online. MySpace itself is not dangerous– it can be a great way to stay in touch with friends, actually– it’s putting too much personal info and other stupid things that make MySpace a potential danger. I would much rather know that my child has a myspace, and know the page so I can check on it from time to time if I feel I need t, than to BAN it and have my kid use it anyway behind my back.
hahahah.
no! haven’t they been trying to get kids to stop doing drugs and drinking for years? how is myspace different?
at home?!? Good luck. Idiots…
Let’s hear it for the death of Freedom of Speech. Rather than talk about the activities that could get them in trouble, let’s ban the kids. It’s none of that minister’s business and someone needs to tell him that.
Let me amend that. Ban at school or church–I still have a problem with that but I can see their point. Pay attention to school work. Church is not the place for surfing the ‘net anyway. But what I do at home is MY business.
noooooooo.
kids find ways
why don’t they ban candy while they’re at it.
no.
this whole debate is getting to be so old. and lame.
myspace and other websites like it are only dangerous if you allow them to be.
if these young girls and boys didn’t post pictures of themselves in various poses and put suggestive comments on. people wouldn’t be trying to get ahold of them. then these children are falling into the trap that these creepers are setting and meeting up with them because they seem nice. if parents stepped in and became involved with what was going on. none of it would be happening.
You can’t ban a website from someones personal computer… thats retarded.. and controlling if you ask me!
Yeah, I’m not sure why the school gets to ban what kids do at home.
I think the activities the kids participate in are the ym’s business, but he doesn’t have the authority to outlaw something on which Scripture isn’t explicit. And myspace can be a positive thing.
You know, the tighter you squeeze, the more that runs through your fingers. I’m all about parameters and discipline, but that doesn’t necessitate micromanaging.
Could they ban something more constructive instead? Like bill paying?
When you tell a child that they can’t do something….what happens? It makes it even more exciting for them to do it! Kids are smart these days when it comes to computers and technology. For the first time ever I feel almost lost when talking to my nephew about my computer. The things that kid can do on myspace…amazing. If his father (who also has a myspace) ever told him not to use myspace.. I doubt that would stop him for more than a day.
I wonder what Mommy Dearest (the “devout” J Dub) would think.
this youth minister is a classic example of brainwashing (and failing at it) people to perform Christianity. Christianity is a mystical experience with God that leads to love, joy, peace, etc.
Myspace is a moronic waste of time. So are most kids. Rather than simply banning myspace and thinking the problem solved, parants should work to teach their kids how to spend their time in worthwhile ways. Like working, or drinking, or smoking weed. That’s what I did in school, none of this new-fangled myspace crap!
They are always going to find a way around it.
Anyway, myspace isnt that dangerous if you aren’t an idiot. Dont’ post gross sexy pictures of yourself and dont give out personal information and dont be friends with creepy men you dont know.
It’s kinda like terrorism, When you remove the head another rises in it’s place.
Keeping kids off of myspace is like whack a mole.
No.
I don’t think public schools have any business telling parents what their children are allowed to do at home. However, if it is a private school and the parents choose to abide by the rules and send their kids there – more power to them.
I can only hope and pray that [as a parent] I am doing a good job raising my children…
There comes a certain time where all U can do is give them is guidance, and hope that U have taught them to make, good solid decisions to “do the right thing”… because kids are going to do what they want to do- Especially if they are forbidden.
You tell someone NOT to do someone, especially a child… and it’s only natural that they are curious.
LoL^ I like that whack-a-mole analogy. hilarious.
No, you can’t, or any other similar site…and it’s hubris to think anyone can. That’s really a parenting issue.
they should teach them internet safety instead of just totally taking it away.
it’s like a school teaches kids only abstinence, instead of methods of contraception.
you can ban your space, but you can’t ban my space.
That is hilarious. Telling a kid that they can’t do something just makes them want to do it even more so. Outright banning things like MySpace turns our otherwise democratic nation more so into totaltarionism. (I am aware I can’t spell, I’m sorry.) It’s the first step really…any people wonder why Americans are so fucked up…”Freedom for all! –But don’t you -dare- open a MySpace account or you’ll go to hell!”
You can’t ban kids from it. You just make the youth act sneakier instead of being open with their families. I think it’s ridiculous at any rate.
So long as they let xanga . . . thats silly, the youth minister at out chruch made a big deal about how to be safe on myspace. That was a better way of doing it
On a particular server or at a school, yes. And of course parents have the right to tell their children they’re not allowed to use it. But I’m sure it’s very difficult to keep people away from it if they’re really determined to be on it.
Not really and it doesn’t solve the real problem. Kids need to be taught not to give out too much information over the internet and their parents have to be aware of what they are doing on line… (who they are talking to, etc.)
This is yet another example of people trying to solve a problem without going through any extra effort. Sorry, folks, but the real solution involves being an actual parent to your children and putting in the extra time.
The only solution to the problem is to monitor what your children are doing on the internet! Don’t put a computer in their room – put it out in the open in your house. Ask questions – who is this person?, how do you know them?, etc. Don’t allow them access to the computer if you are not home. (password protect it!) Check the history – what sites are they visiting? Set up a filter to block sites you don’t want them to visit, etc. Be involved! Talk to your kids! Look at the screen frequently if they are on the computer!
Personally, I hate myspace, but this is going too far. They are stepping on the feet of free use. The kids have the freedom of making a myspace if they want. When you make one, a security question asks you if you are older than 13. If you want to stop underage kids from using myspace, try raising the age to 16, and then having a little more enforcement that way.
Have you heard about the dangers of dihydrogen monoxide? http://www.junkscience.com/news/glassman.html
PLease ask your youth minister to petition his kids to ban that too!
i think it’s smart. i’ve had people I know, relatives, that have gotten in a lot of trouble over myspace. One lost her National Honors Society memembership because she had a picture of alcohol on it. A lot of students got suspended over it in my alma mater this passed school year.
My 16 yr old sister has one. I’ve had one for a while. My mother saw me go through a lot of issues with my friends over these blogging sites, and so she finally got smart and got one herself and made us befriend her so she could keep an eye on our content.
I hated her for it at first, but now i completely understand. Kids don’t realize the effects of these sites. Also, our university can actually CHARGE us a fine for ungerage drinking.
I was going to say exactly what mightymarce said, but she said it better.
ps, i doubt they can actually ban it, but at least kids can be aware of the repercussions of putting inappropriate things on their websites.
Yeah, like that is going to work. I can see banning it at school, but not at home. If they would just educate the kids about how to use the internet safely, then they wouldn’t have to worry about it so much.
And the ones who get themselves into stupid trouble, well, maybe the whole survival of the fittest theory was on to something.
Have you heard about the dangers of dihydrogen monoxide? http://www.junkscience.com/news/glassman.html
PLease ask your youth minister to petition his kids to ban that too!
Posted 3/23/2007 8:59 AM by AristotleForDummies
i learned about this in highschool, and again my freshman yr of college. very eye opening! people in my classes actually voted to ban it!!!!
the only way to ban myspace is to permanently blind all your kids, that way they probably won’t want to even go on the net anymore
that is ridiculous. It’s up to the parents themselves to decide if their child is mature enough to use MySpace. and they need to be monitering their child’s use of it.
how are you today?
*HUGS*
I think it’s stupid to ban the use of myspace. Kids are only in danger if they do somehting stupid, like post their address, or phone number, or agree to meet somebody somewhere. That’s just ridiculous, and if they can’t avoid stupid mistakes like that, then they don’t need to be on the internet at all. They should teach the children about safe internet usage, instead of banning them from social websites.
I can see enforcing that rule in school, but I don’t know how they are going to enforce it in a student’s home.
THEY CAN TRY BUT THEY CAN ACCESS IT FROM CELL PHONES NOW…I THINK IT WILL BE A BIT HARD, THE KIDS LOVE THAT FORUM.
I’m live in MI, so I have been hearing about this left and right… I don’t see how a school can dictate what a student does on his/her own private, out of school time. I have mixed feelings about this. And isn’t tell a kid they can’t have a MySpace account just going to make it all the more appealing to them?
definitely not. myspace is only dangerous if you put things on the site that allow your site to be dangerous. you just have to be cautious of what you are posting and why are you using it. if people try to ban myspace, there will always be a way to get around the block and use it. it’s better to warn people of the dangers and allow them to use it at their own risk than to completely ban it and have kids use it behind their parents’ backs.
There is nothing wrong with myspace itself. That’s like telling kids they can’t go to the mall, or to the movies, or to other social networking events. It’s only dangerous if used improperly. There are safefy features one can use: features on the website, common sense, and good parental guidance makes the dangers of myspace almost non-existent.
I’m on MySpace, and I am seeking youth ministry employment, and I think to ban MySpace is like banning people who are sharing their faith from talking to non-believers. It makes no logical sense. This is our culture. We must embrace the good and seek to use it for the glory of God (As Christians). If MySpace can be used for good, then it must be used for the common good.
To ban MySpace is just a way to micromanage people’s lives, and that is a symptom of some bigger control issues that need to be dealt with.
Of course michigan did it. Michigan sucks. I’ll bet my school is next.
And myspace isnt’ dangerous if you’re smart about it. But I guess these people are complete and utter idiots
should you ban the use of xanga? or facebook?
CAN YOU BAN IT?
I think it’s less of a problem with how the students use it, and probably more of a problem with other people who use it to prey on those students. I don’t know if I would ban it persay, but rather raise an awareness amongst kids as to the dangers and pitfalls, and provide them viable solutions to help them avoid those dangers. It won’t be fool proof, but it may help.
Yes, you can ban anything if people are dumb enough to listen to you.
The school doesn’t have the right to ban the use of myspace off of school properity and time. That, and the paster is overstepping his bounds. The only people who can ban it is the parents.
No, but that reminds me of the movie “footloose” when they banned dancing!! LMAO
haha no, not possible without taking away civil rights
no, thats dumb – like banning the internet. Anything thats on myspace can be found on the internet anyway.. cant it? (the good, the bad, and the ugly.. ha ha ha)
I would never ban a website and i really do not see how a school can ban students from using it at home. They might get away with it in middle school because the students are underage (not 14 – the policy of myspace) but comon, thats just pure censorship to try and do it at home, which the school CANNTO do becaus they have no right over the children outside the goverment funded property.
The culture in america is relationship-based and myspace and any other profile site, is all about integrating that with technology
- Daniel (doubledb)
A school has no write to say you can’t have a Myspace!
The school is become a dictator. . .
Myspace should sue. . .
Federal Judge scores a victory for free speech online and the BXU rises again!
Dr. Ebola
I think educating children/teens is a better route.
Look at it this way, someone sets an iced mocha on the counter and tells you, “Don’t drink that!” What is the first thing you are going to want to do?
Drink it.
Banning myspace only creates a need to experience it, see what it’s all about.
Considering much of the crap that is taught in schools, wouldn’t it be more beneficial if Myspace banned school attendance, on pain of losing your account?
Also Dan, you should do the equal opportunities thingy, and post a link to your minister’s exhortations, as well as that to the school’s pronouncements. Then we your learned council could compare the two, and give a ridicule-rating.
Unfortunatley kids just don’t listen. It doesn’t surprise me that they just got different accounts! The only way for it to really be banned is for every one to block it off of their computers.
No, by just placing a strict “don’t do this!” on an activity instead of having an open dialog on it kids will do it and get into trouble with it and won’t tell their parents plus…
A lot of kids use myspace to keep track of their bands or their friend’s small band Myspace is great for keeping track of small bands and stuff like that.
See, even my boyfriend has a Myspace band
You hit the nail right on the head theologian. Voting certainly is much better than changing the govt by armed conflict now isn’t it? ( ; I’m an independant myself…. frankly both parties are spineless.
Via your link, a quote from the statement issued by St Hugo’s of the Hills Catholic School - “School officials felt it necessary to apply the new policy after recent cases of adults, some in authoritative positions, posed as minors to converse or meet with young boys and girls.”
What type of “adults in authoritative positions,” may one ask? Priests perhaps? That’s doubtful, they seem to have done quite well so far without the help of the internet. Perhaps they resent the competition? This is disgraceful! Are there no laws in the USA to prevent monopolies?
Don’t ban Myspace. Kids will eventually grow out of it, and realize how silly it is..and get a facebook or a xanga instead. =D
not really, in fact, the attempt to ban it will probably only harden the children’s resolve. I’m still not sure why they’d want to ban it though, I’ve never really seen anything to make it more dangerous than any other place similiar to it. To be honest, I’m kind of incredulous at the audacity of the school to ban something a student does at home that is in no way illegal or tied to the school. If I were a student I’d be deeply affronted. It’s like the school’s banning a facet of expressing themselves.
I can see the school discouraging use of MySpace…but signing a contract doesn’t mean anything if someone wants to do it anyway.
Dude.
You’re doing it again. OVERPOSTING.
You’ve slowed Xanga down again.
Ease up on the fascinating questions, or better yet, look up the answers yourself.
A concerned Xangan.
the only way you’d be able to ban any of those type websites is to not even introduce them to the child. once they know about it, of course they’re gonna want to use it.
I don’t think that the school should be stepping into the parent’s job. I don’t have a problem with the school warning the parents about the dangers of the internet and give them tips on how to keep their kids safe, but making rules for the parents isn’t their job. Besides, danger doesn’t just lurk on myspace.
If we want to be communists…I would think guidelines would be better than banning it,the kids are lying and being deceitful to have their secret accounts…as if that is so much better.
I’m pretty sure that’s beyond the jurisdiction of what a school can do outside of the school.
That’s the interesting part about that Bong Hits 4 Jesus case, too. Where does school jurisdiction end and parents’ responsibility begin? Or free speech protection? Or medical rights?
But people these days, we’re all about making it someone else’s problem, you know? If parents aren’t willing to take that responsibility themselves, the school feels obligated to step in. etc.
I think that the school can ban its use while at school…but not outside of it…that is the decision of the parents. I know that as a youth minister my husband has a myspace account. he does warn about the ‘dangers that can be on myspace or anyother website like that and encourages the kids to be careful and to use it as a ministry tool for outreach…but what they do with it is ultimately up to them.
No way. It’s stupid to try. It’s sort of like cursing. It’s banned at school and most children’s parents don’t allow them to, but a lot of kids still will.
I don’t see what the big deal is. But kids are going to have one if they want to. There are computers everywhere now days.
If we want to be communists…I would think guidelines would be better than banning it,the kids are lying and being deceitful to have their secret accounts…as if that is so much better.
Pfft! No. They’ll just go underground. A wise man told me that…
Did I miss your response to Ed’s tag??
Actually, they are probably lying through their teeth as regards their motives in seeking such a ban. If they know anything of Myspace, then with their mentality, their real resentment will be that the kids are talking not to “adult posing as minors,” but to each other, and – horror! – might might speak UNTO each other in a lewd and impious manner, and attend not to their prayers, fastings and meditations, and may even send UNTO each other piccys that cause no distress to the financially prudent re the display of designer labels on clothing, howbeit that they have discarded such clothing in an attempt to return to the Garden of Eden.
St Hugo’s should be more practical, and send Myspace a crate of fig leaves, that the little pagans may sew themselves aprons, as per Genesis.
You can certainly ban its use *at* school and church (because you should be focusing on school and God when you’re at those places), but you can’t tell parents what their own children are allowed to do in the privacy of their own homes. If parents decide to ban it, that’s their decision, not the schools or the youth ministers. Xanga is just as dangerous as MySpace, its just simply the way its used. If there is enough parental supervision the children will be fine. Without posting personal information and suggestive pictures, its harmless. A lot of church youth groups in my area have myspace pages, its a great way for the youth minister to check up on the kids and keep in touch. MySpace can be a very positive or very negative thing, its just all in the way you decide to use it.
This coming from a 16 year old kid who has a MySpace.
Obviously not
Ridiculous. Absolutely Ridiculous!
not on someone’s own computer on their own time. the public schools should not have that kind of power over the lives of the students.
T’is impossible.
ok i posted my comment before i realized that the school in question is a private sreligous chool. the thing about private schools is that they can pretty much make up whatever rules they want because the parents send their children voluntarily. i go to a xtian private college, so i know how it works. since the parents choose to send their kids, there, they choose to adhere to the rules of the school. now if it was public school where attendance is required, they have absolutely no right to tell a student what they or may not do on their own time unless it directly affects the school itself.
*religious school.* dang.
The kids will do what they want to. If that is to be on Myspace then they will be on myspace. I don’t know where the school or your youth pastor thinks they have the right to ban the use of myspace, or any other site, from being used on a kid’s own time. If you want to keep the kids off of myspace then you have to convince the kids that they do not want to be on Myspace and not set rules preventing them from being on myspace. We all know that being told not to do something only increases the likelihood of a kid doing that thing.
Myspace can be used in a safe manner with very little, if any, problems; so to say that it is all bad shows a high level of ignorance.
What a bunch of nonsense. They just suspended a bunch of students where I live for saying derogatory things about a teacher on Facebook. Last time I checked, the school is responsible for what happens on their property – no where else. I’m more than willing to concede that some parents seem ready to abdicate their responsibility, and possibly already have, they should think twice about some arbitary board taking over for them. While I generally think that slippery slope arguments are lazy, in this case I really shudder to think where we’ll be if this keeps up: “Johnny, we heard you sassed your Granny and watched a tv show we don’t like, so you’ll have to stay for detention.” Meanwhile, Johnny begins to realize mom and dad don’t have any power at all. That’s messed up.
Don’t do drugs! Don’t drink and drive! Don’t have sex! Don’t go on myspace!
You can lead a horse to water, but you can’t make it drink.
No, because that will only make the kids seek out an alternative, myspace-like site. And there are many of them out there.
Can’t you view Myspace as a symptom, and not as the problem? Blaming Myspace for issues with youth is such an easy scapegoat for permissive parenting.
The more the adults protest against something the more shiny & attractive it will become to the kiddies! Why can’t the parents just put up some bounderies with allowing their kids to use MySpace? That’s what I did with my kid. I think MySpace is stupid really, but it is a phase. Now the big thing is Facebook. I think Xanga is way better than both of the other two put together. I consider it a creative outlet. The other two seem to be like a drive-by waving type of site. But this is just my opinion. Are you supportive of the youth pastor’s decision to “ban” myspace from the youth at your church?
I’m a much bigger fan of reformation from within the system than simply banning something. Myspace is such a popular thing, kids aren’t going to stop using it just because somebody tells them not to. Which do you think is more important to a 13 year old, doing what “the man” tells them to or doing what is popular? I think it’d be a much better solution for the youth pastor or school, or parents (shouldn’t they be the one to decide if their kid can’t have a myspace anyway?) to ask myspace to have more safety measures. If enough people gave a crap about it, and said something about it, then it would happen.
No, most likely not.
But kids these days need to be smart about using MySpace.
Like for me, my MySpace is private, only viewable to my friends. And I usually don’t accept friend requests from people I don’t know. If you just know how to stay safe then you’ll be okay. -shrugs-
So I need to take some sexy photos of myself for myspace? My myspace is pretty boring, no bling, no sparkles, I have a zwinky free myspace.
I guess you could say my myspace is WACK!!! There are no veiled drug references and all of my photos are from within the past six months. I don’t even lie about my age! Holy crap man, my “myspace freinds” are all over 21 too!
So wack yo, no wonder I only have like 10 friends…
Dan, hit me up on myspace! I want 11 myspace freinds..
Now, the school, the kids… Is this a private school? Do the parents pay, and therefore actively seek out to send their kids to this school? I am assuming that this is a junior high, no way this place can be a high school.
This policy is like American politics. It says all the right puff, but it is flaccid and impotent legislation that concerned parents can “applaud” and “commend the school for it’s actions to make children safer” but actually it’s useless, adds more bureaucracy someone can be paid to handle. A new school safety position, the internet safety officer! How about the state internet safety commissioner! What is your stance on internet safety? Do you protect children from evildoers?
Loaded catchphrases that are more smoke and mirrors. The real issues slip through the cracks while we choke on puff issues.
How useless.
I am trying to get a proxy server built for the vocational lab. The proxy server will block sites like facebook.com and myspace.com, newgrounds and pogo. It is supposed to be a simulated work environment and this is a behavior modification strategy to instill in our students that employers have written policy about ethical use of it’s internet resources for employees. When the kids try to go to myspace they would be redirected to a big brother like page that chidess them “would you go to myspace at work if your employer could and did log everything you did on the internet while you use THEIR computers?
That is legitimate. Our open labs? Unrestricted access. A simulated work environment? It is actually for their own good. I would not want a graduate of my program to lose a job with myspace at their first job in the real world. At the same time, I fight to have the ports open or AIM and ichat AV in our beautiful imac open labs so people can video conference using that damn isight cameras I paid so dearly to have installed…
It’s pushme-pullyou. This school is wrong, and as always, I am always right.
Last bit – do not ask another authority to protect you.
You will not like it.
End of story.
Not in this country as long as we have the constitution.
That is all
Myspace is not the problem, as has been said…
I work with middle school kids and a bunch of them have myspaces….and most of them are responsible about it…. a few of them though post comments and bulletins that are inappropriate….but you know what…that’s the reason I have a myspace, it’s to watch out for my middle schoolers….so i can talk to them and have some credibility when I confront them about issues like myspace content…
Education is key for kids whose parents don’t care about what they put on the internet or anything else about their lives for that matter….if parents cared it would be a different story…
Hmm, I mean, for me, I use myspace but it’s protected and I don’t get into any trouble on it….I guess it can be dangerous, but I’ve never been in a situation to see that yet. Hmm…maybe I need to read up on the specific reasons for the ban.
The school attempting to ban it’s use is about as good as the border patrol keeping illegal drugs out of our country
I can understand banning the website from a school’s computer, but if someone told me–especially a school–that I could not access this website on my own time, in the comfort of my own home–on a computer that I own–well, frankly, I’d tell them to go screw themselves, and kiss my ass, because I’ll do whatever I damn well please. Although perhaps not in so many colorful words. But that is ridiculous. And controlling. What are they going to do, monitor every student’s personal computer to make sure they don’t get on?
nope.
Obviously you can try.
My approach as a teacher is to have my own site and keep an eye on them. I also try to teach them responsibility concerning the use of it. I am afraid it is here to stay whether school or churches want it or not.
The merits of the idea to ban MySpace are questionable at best. Of course, some MySpace sites are dangerous. But some phone numbers are also dangerous. Should we ban all use of the telephone just because some teens with poor judgement might use it to call an unsavory 1-900 number?
But that’s not what really gets under my skin. I think schools and churches that try to prevent teens from using MySpace at all have a backwards model for raising children.
Why do I say that? Because a teenager is a child on the brink of full-blown adulthood. Soon, they’ll start living away from home, with no parental oversight over their day-to-day choices. So adolescence should be a time when parents can ease up on such things, and start trusting their kids-soon-to-be-adults to make responsible decisions. I’m not saying that parents should let their kids break the law or anything like that. I’m just saying that, by this point, the constant “looking over the shoulder” shouldn’t be needed anymore.
Here’s the basic idea: as a child grows and matures, both freedom and responsibility should grow at about an equal pace.
Children start out with no freedoms and no responsibility. As children demonstrate responsibility, parents can trust them with some freedom. Children who use their new freedom wisely have proven that they can handle the responsibility well, and will be entrusted with more freedoms. On the other hand, children who use their new freedoms poorly have their freedoms scaled back, until they can show that they have developed the responsibility needed to use the freedom wisely.
The process continues in this way throughout childhood. The goal is that, by the time the child becomes an adult, the child-become-adult has learned the responsibilities needed in order to handle the freedom of adulthood properly. For that to happen, the freedom and responsibility levels both need to be pretty high by the time a child reaches the teen years.
Unfortunately, the parenting model in vogue today is the reverse of that. Little kids are given broad freedoms with little responsibility. When those kids become teenagers, they expect to continue having broad freedoms and little responsibility. But the parents see how irresponsible their teens are, and try to impose rules upon them (like banning MySpace).
As I said, completely backwards. If parents wait until the teenage years to try to teach their kids responsibility, it’s almost always too late.
When it comes to the Internet, schools should have nothing to do with students involvements with it outside of the school setting. That’s the parents’ jobs. If some parents don’t care if their kids have myspaces, but the school bans them from having them, it’s not going to do a damned thing. If the school tries to monitor it, the kids will make new accounts, like you said. It’s a nice idea that they want to protect their students, but they really can’t when it comes to the Internet when the kids are at home.
I think it is stupid. It’s fine to ban it from school property, but you can’t tell people what to do in the privacy of their own homes. I wouldn’t sign it, especially if it were a public school.
Or you can be like me… I have their passwords and I routinely check it. Is it right? I don’t care what anyone thinks about my “violating” their world because I have the right and duty to protect my children. IF I see they are befriended by someone who is inappropriate I bring it to their attention that this person isn’t safe, someone they know etc and they need to block them. So far they each only have their school friends on there and you must be their friend to see their pages. You can either ban it and hope they don’t use it or you can monitor their useage and be proactive about it.
u can ban it.
but that doesnt mean people will stop using it.
lyssa, the yellow one
not really. They could tell someone not to do it, but that doesn’t mean they won’t.
Fascists!
They block it at work, and I can be ok with that, but what school, church, job should tell me what I can do online at home on my personal computer.
No, and I think it’s dumb that they try.
and it’s none of the school’s damn business to ban it at home.
See, this is what I said would happen a few days ago in the smoking ban. Schools regulating what kids do in their own homes.
The government is overstepping their boundaries. They should not dictate what websites kids use – that should be up to the parents.
You can try to ban the use of myspace, but it won’t be effective unless you have a really good way of monitoring kids everywhere they go.
The church shouldn’t regulate it either. Like I said, parents should be the judges of what their kids do, not the school, church, or government. Why doesn’t the church or school just talk to the PARENTS about the dangers of Myspace? It’s really not that hard.
i think its crazy myspace getsall the bad publicity–there are plenty of other blog sites just as bad. Just here on xanga there are tons of sites of people who give you ideas on how to kill yourself, how to have and hide your anorexia/bulemia from your parents/friends/counselors, sites about cutting/injuring yourself, people naked/half-naked, on and on..
You repress something with a neutral nature and you create an illness. This is simply an example of people who dont know how to train cultured youth cheating on the job. Myspace can be a very very positive networking tool. Bans and boycotts create problems, not solve them. Instead of banning something out of cowardice, they need to grow a pair and preach self-respect. Keep it real and it will be real.
I am wondering, Dan, have you reported to the officials of your church the violations of the church directive to its members?
I do not understand how a school can tell people what to do in their homes. But then schools do not teach reading, spelling, writing, math, science, or history anymore. Schools are more concerned with social engineering now.
unless you become china and block it for EVERYONE, its not really going to work. But you can try.
No, and that is just silly! Send out warnings or whatever, and encourage parents to stay involved with what their kids are doing on the internet, but banning it is impossible and useless. It won’t happen unless the site shuts down.
That is ridiculous. It is for the children and their guardians to decide, not for the school. And it’s stereotyping, as well- not all kids are stupid enough to post personal information. It’s unfair to judge all children because of the mistakes of one or a few..
Not really. It is the internet, after all.
No.
Yeah, the schools banning it really makes me laugh. . .like they have ANY control over what kids do at home. You gotta love the youth leader, TRYING to do a good thing, but he’s way out of his depth. . .Really not his decision to make either. The only people who could LIMIT access to MySpace would be Mom and Dad; they can always take the computer away. Now if a kid wanted to ’break the rules’ he could still check it at friends’ houses.
I’d rather just teach my kids to have some discernment and trust that they won’t do anything stupid.
are you fucking kidding me? We’re a myspace culture [however unfortunate] and that’s just not possible.
En mi opinion…
Trying to get teenagers not to do something is like trying to nail jello to a tree. YOU-ARE-GOING-TO-FAIL.
Teenagers are ornery and stubborn and don’t like being told what to do unless they ask for directions, which they nearly never do. They’re arrogant and think they always know the right way to do things. trust me, i am one, and as much as we hate to admit it, all of the above are true. besides, trying to shove some internet safety down their throats might work a little better.
it’ll never work!
besides, isn’t making sure your kids aren’t talking to creepy old men on myspace the parent’s jobs?
Technically it’s feasible only if you have administrative access to all computers the kids are exposed to. And even then you have things like personal web servers (the Circumventor), so it would be nearly impossible to do that. So server-based banning is impossible.
And unless you know something (a lot) about computers, that’s about all that’s available to you.
That is both ridiculous and stupid. And other choice words. It’s MySpace.
“Yeah, I’m not sure why the school gets to ban what kids do at home….You know, the tighter you squeeze, the more that runs through your fingers. I’m all about parameters and discipline, but that doesn’t necessitate micromanaging.” – stuartandabby. Good comment. I agree.
The comment left by jenimm was also good. MySpace isn’t dangerous unless you’re an idiot. People who a) put out too much personal information b) post “gross sexy pictures” of themselves c) post stupid/drunk pictures of themselves, and/or d) friend creepy people they don’t know are just asking for trouble.
If you’re using it responsibly, it can be useful. For a lot of my friends it has replaced the use of email. My MySpace doesn’t have anything on it I wouldn’t mind the whole world seeing. It’s not completely 100% me, but neither is the rest of my “public life”, get what I’m saying? I don’t know. It’s not a problem for me. However, it WOULD be if I was banned from it. I’d lose contact with a lot of people.
“In fact, I saw that the youth minister’s son has one.” Well I like it that we hold people to higher standards still due to the positions of their fathers. Thats comforting.
You cant ban something that wishes not to be itself banned.
Good luck
It isn’t the schools decision to dictate whether the kids get to use myspace. Its the parents. Srsly.
Anyway, no. Besides, myspace isn’t that bad if you’re not a stupid slut.
i think that is completely unnecessary and should be up to well-informed parents who have not been fed biased information.
oh, i just love adults who are wrong but have to be in control…yay!
Bloody ridiculous.
Sometimes there are danger in going to church too. Banning everything isn’t going to make it better.
I don’t think that’s legal…?
no, its more like an excercise in restiction of free speech. Kids have the right too
Sure. It does not mean people will comply.
I dont think there is much point in trying to ban it.
I mean, yah, there is some inappropriate content out there, but sooner or later, kids are going to see/hear it.
As long as you teach them right, MySpace has no harm…including the whole ‘kidnapping’ thing.
Thats got to be the stupidest thing… like ever. MySpace isn’t even that dangerous. Have you noticed, its only the idiots who post “sexy” pictures of themselves and talk to old men that have this happening? Jesus, its all their fault, and now people think its wrong. It’s no worse than Xanga! Or any other part of the internet!
Who gives a fuck? I hate myspace.
No, it’s impossible.
And it is certainly not the school’s or the youth pastor’s place to regulate what the kids do on their own time. That’s ridiculous.
[ariana]
That is just about the stupidest thing I have ever heard.
I like how as soon as you make a Myspace, you have perverts attacking you. Seriously. None of my friends have talked about being harassed by some old man posing as a young girl or whatever. There’s no “Random Search” feature or “Featured Myspaces’” (Cough, Xanga). The only thing that will attack you is a spam bot every second month
I say if your kid has nothing to hide on MySpace, then he should let his/her parents check in on it every now and then to make sure they are not up to anything bad. If you know who you’re adding, I see no problem in it. I do recommend not using MySpace, it’s really addicting and even more a waste of your time.
But, it’s a huge internet phenomena and it’s not going to go away. For a long time at least.
my scool banned myspace 2.
no, and nothing about myspace is inherently wrong.
Well, you technically can by being a law maker and saying, “There is now a law banning the use of myspace.” But how effective is it? There are always going to be people that get around it and will use it, anyway.
Not really… The best thing to do would be to teach them how to stay safe instead of trying to just get them to stop altogether. I doubt they’ll stop… We just have to teach them how to stay safe.
I wouldn’t go to MySpace for a million bucks.
Bunch of pretentious posers over there.
hahahaha
But, I don’t think anyone has the right to tell anyone else what they can or cannot do. Freedom of speech, baby. It’s still a Constitutional Right, even though some republican bastards would like to see it taken away from anyone who disagrees with them.
They ban it at my school, but most of the kids know how to use the net better than most of the teachers–and everyone knows proxy servers they can get through the blocks with.
so nyah nyah nyah.
It’s our lives and we do what we want.
Myspace is no different from Xanga.
Kids need to be taught safety…not being banned
Where is our freedom of expression?
When are teenagers going to learn to deal with their own risks?
Substituting our judgments for theirs is a bad idea. Young people now won’t learn how to make their own decisions about their own safety, etc., if adults try to take away the things that could even potentially be a hazard at our own fault.
Not to mention.. private use, I think it should be illegal to ban it from private use. Someone at school should have no say in what goes on in your home, as it’s none of their business.
Yes ban it!
ugh, talk about in loco parentis…
well I guess the government could do it
that’s so ridiculous. the worst part is that it’s adults banning something that generally younger people use- it’s something they don’t fully understand because they don’t take part. it’s just about control.
If you tell kids not to do something, all that will happen is that they’ll do it more.
Well if you ban MySpace where do you stop? I mean is MySpace any worse than MTV? It’s all a matter of moderation and taking responsibility for your children and your own actions.
http://www.adambourque.com
Nope.
It’s impossible.
and people wonder why home schooling is becoming more popular…I’m glad my daughter is grown, but if a school decided to tell me what to do/not do I’d have to tell them to F*off. I’m not letting them blackmail me^_^
You can lay all the reason, options, etc…out there, but “ban”? Eeehhhh. I know how I would have reacted back during my teenage years. You might have well as said, “Go! Set up an account!” I would have done the opposite.
there are positive and negative sides to it I guess…. I mean… for the Christians, look at the connective and ministerial opportunities! Yeah, there’s risks…but won’t they face them in real life too? …. i’m still kind of split on the subject…but I have one.lol
yes, I wish they could and of course xanga. I am on checking up on my 15 yr. old daughter. Kids are way way more computer and internet savy then adults. And it is our JOB to protect them from people and things that would cause them harm.
they cant really tell you what to do at home…….is anti-constitutional
thats just sad…why dont they just lock theirselves in a fucking box seriously?
this isnt 1902 anymore.
we have technology.
we keep developing technology.
if you dont want to live amongst human beings,go lock yourself up somewhere…
these policies are as stupid as “no child left behind”
granted that they have good intentions behind them, the policies themselves hinder individuals’ rights. in regards to “no child left behind,” it also sets unreasonable and farfetched expectations that would be rarely met.
Well, if we rant about issues like this is can keep us busy, and we can congratulate our selves on DOING something. Unfortunately, one must analyze what is the objective in any enterprise. If the objective is a family of true love; this is rather irrelevant. I am trying to get my girl to help me WITH my myspace. Oh well. But I know others who have nice families, lots of interaction, that ban it . But from the family level….and they seem ok with it. Relationship. Reciprocity. Relevance We all need it! Three r’s?
So, I’m going to assume that the Constitution doesn’t apply to minors?
My school bans all entertainment at school lol we cant even go to discoverychannel.com for homework, no google images, no nothing just research, but not at home…
I love myspace, God knows I do. I just got rid of my myspace account. IT is BERRY BERRY addicting–you can lose hours and even days on myspace. I have a friend who just got told off by one of her myspace amigos….and even though it is a great way to network and meet people, it is also very dangerous and can be misused. I know a lot of people who are on there when they should be working…it is diminishing our productivity at work. The internet is taking a lot of time out of our lives in general. I don’t know. I think a lot of people have been hurt and find the internet/myspace/xanga a less threatening way to meet and interact with people. How are your interpersonal skills going to be sharp if you don’t talk with people in person? I agree, some people don’t deserve to be in person–but sometimes nothing compares to seeing a reaction. I love myspace–I think banning it is a step in the wrong direction. I don’t think kids need to be on there as much as they are–but that’s the parent’s responsibility!
That’s dumb. MySpace isn’t bad as long as the kids don’t allow it to become that way.
Okay, well if you ban it from school, that’s reasonable, but when you ban it from home, I doubt that it will be rid of. It might get rid of some myspace accounts, but not 100%.
There are alot of christian myspace pages. The only reason it’s dangerous is because of some individuals. Instead of banning the good ones can we ban the bad ones or create a good alternative?
… That just seems dumb. I mean, I hate myspace, but you can’t ban someone from doing something on the internet. Its not like you can set up a web block program that only blocks myspace. And seriously, telling someone they can’t do something, only makes them want to do it more.
No way. My mom used to lock me up in the safe, and I still could get out and “did things”
I will cry if my school bans MySpace. I watch 24′s latest episode on MySpace on Tuesday if I fall asleep on Monday night http://www.myspace.com/fox
BTW I agree with the school. I will ban it too at home if I have children
kids have the right to do what they….sure parents can say they can’t go on myspace….but i don’t believe a school can say that
Maybe on school computers & church comps. Other than that, organizations are overstepping their bounds banning it from the kid’s homes. Can’t help it if some kids are idiots enough to post non-artistic nude photos of themselves.
They can not control what goes on at home.
Sure you can ban myspace; but, the only ones that will adhere to it will be those who follow the rules anyway. …kind of like banning guns, the people that follow the rules get rid of there, and those who don’t follow rules, keep theirs. It’s the same for any law of any kind. You have those who follow it, and those who don’t. – JN.14:27 Rom.5:8
why??
im pretty sure that kinda destroys personal rights.
and not to mention that its not myspace’s fault.
they do everthing to warn the kids not to post personal info and they keep everyone safe.
its more or less the choices the kids make on myspace that should worry the parents
i never have a problem on myspace… then again , my profile is private and i dont use my first or last name.
so maybe they should try common sense instead of banning shit
A school CANNOT ban the use of MySpace by ANYONE at home. In fact, a school can’t ban anything that isn’t on their property. A school can filter myspace on their computers…and if the school is fortunate enough to have laptops, the school can ban any website that they want on those laptops…but it is not under the school’s juristiction to ban anything at home: that is for the parents, or for the city, county, state, and federal authorites. And is really not supposed to be federal authorities.
Schools are institutions of learning. They should have no say in the decisions of that child, unless it has to do with the general working of the school. The values and private decisions of children are the parent’s decision.
i didn’t know kids in Michigan had myspaces… =P
wow. thats so dumb. i would not sign that policy.
Can you really ban the use of myspace?
no, you cant.
tons of schools don’t allow their computers to access myspace at all. but there is no way in hell you can try to ban their students from using the site in their own private time. i don’t know anybody who uses myspace to talk to people they don’t know. mostly everyone i know has it blocked unless you’re a “friend”. if anything i’m sure attempting to ban it has increased the number of students who have an account, just to stick it to the principal/teachers. pretty lame if you ask me.
the kids need a reason to stay away. in my last youth group i had a myspace as the youth pastor. AS i began to surf the many many accounts my students had i noticed most of them were not representing the values we talked about at church. Some of these students were from sheltered home and were very niave. I began a series of Bible studies on being christ like even online. i never banned my space but some of the students shanged there my space and many gave it up. i educated them in some of the dangers and many switched to xanga. Telling a student they can not do something is like darring them to do it! Let them make their own decision.
no you cannot ban it
thats stupid. my youth leader has a myspace xanga and what not. our youth group uses them to keep in touch and stuff.
Probably not if you can’t control your kids anyway. Everybody gets to do anything they want anymore ! Every one is afraid to say NO !
I think that people are going to find a way…
i think that is totally ridiculous, what a child does at home is the parents business, a school has no right to ban anything from a student’s private life…sounds a little bit like a dictatorship! they cannot do that, and if i had a child that went to that school i would NOT sign anything, and voice my opinion loudly….what happens if the parent doesn’t sign it? does the child get expelled?
and as far as the church…well of course they are all going to have them…the easiest way to make sure a child does something is to tell them they cannot
you can but its not fair since teens wanna do this stuff
so you can’t really stop someone from doing it even if you think its bad…like cigarettes..if someone wants them they can and you cant ban it
i hope this makes sense…
Psh, no way. Especially when you expressly tell the kids, “No.” It just going to make them want to do it more.
And that is not the place of the church or the school to regulate home activities.
Banning alcohol worked really good during prohibition. And look how how many millions of prisoners we have to spend $40,000 a year for incarceration because of banning marijuana. May as well ban MySpace, too. Long live the land of the free and the home of the brave!!!
This is another case of Big Brother playing the parent role. Why are schools even considering taking on the private lives of their students? I think it’s ridiculous for anyone to attempt to order someone to stop doing someone in their private lives. MySpace is no dangerous then chat rooms, Facebook, Xanga, Hi5, Blogspot, or any other means of communication online. I’ll be glad when the bs calms down.
i shut down myspace account. i am tired of all the junk posts from predators. It’s a place to advertise your face, but, you never really see a good blog. I have other friends that have closed their account. I think having an active blog is great, but myspace is just dumb.
I agree with dreamsofsweden the reason im on here is because its not stupid enough to ask you what school you go to. I think Myspace is a waste of time…
They banned it at my school, but there is no way they could ban it from at home. We would be outraged–it just would not happen.
Anyways, how they banned it at school: They have an internet thing that blocks certain websites. It’s also banned youtube, gonegoth, xanga, basically all the websites that are/were popular with the students at school for more than a month. It’s ridiculous.
I was on myspace once there because there are other websites you can get to myspace through, and I got caught and had to see the principal for it. She gave me a warning. I was so mad! My mom thought it was stupid too…
lol sue them
The way I see it, banning people from having a MySpace account is very much like trying to stop people from drinking milk. Clearly this attempt to stop people or banning them from doing something that is perfectly legal, and poses no danger (its a website for the sake of the Internet!) – and also, its a violation of the freedom of speech, expression, and access to public sites. What’s next? Are they also going to ban people from using Xanga? If they can do one, they clearly can do the other as well? Who do they think they are?
Tell a kid that he can’t do something that is obviously-harmless is the most-useless thing one can do. What you do at your house it your business, not the school’s or minister’s. The minister’s job is to save your souls. The school’s job is to teach you things that will help you later on in life. Does Myspace make you kill people? Cheat on people? Steal from people? Make graven images? Use God’s name in vain? Does it make you lie? Want what is not your’s to want? Does it teach you to hate everybody? Does it LOWER your INTELLIGENCE any bit? In fact, you can learn things from Myspace and the people that’re on it. The internet is only as good as the people that’re on it and the same goes for Myspace. A pedophile can attend any church, can attend any school, can attend any website. Stopping them from getting on it does nothing.
There seems to be so much unnecessary panic/paranoia over MySpace, Xanga, etc. My kids (who are now grown and one is married) have MySpace and Xanga. My daughter-in-law also has them. There’s never been any problem with either of them. I have some family members who are just sure that somehow they are going to be stalked and abducted if anything – name, place of school or employment, pictures – is shared about them. My sister asked me if I wasn’t afraid my 21 year old daughter would be stalked at work because I posted she works at Walmart. Now just which Walmart – out of a bazillion Walmarts – are they going to know to stalk her at?
Kids can be taught not to give out their social security numbers and not to go by themselves to meet complete strangers. That’s where the problems are.
But rather than ban them, why not get involved with them? That’s what we did, and several other moms I know did the same thing. My husband and I both have Xangas and we all see each other’s blogs. They are not protected or private.
Blogs can be good or bad. There’s a right way and a wrong way to use them. Kids just have to be taught the difference, and parents have to be involved. We can’t just ban something because it could have some negative side to it.
Haha it’s little funny. My school has a webfilter for anything like that.. after a girl who went there was taking pictures of herself and calling it art. Then kids would look her up at school and teachers called it “clothed pornography” and kicked her out. Anyways that girl is still doing her thing and myspace still is taking over the world. i love streaming music on there though.. blah!
No. You can’t ban MySpace. Now, if my parents told me they didn’t want me to have a MySpace, I’d delete itwithin a week. I wouldn’t get a new account until they said I could. Mind you, I’d bug ‘em everyday to let me get one.
I know a lot of people who tell me not to mention MySpace around a parent or adult figure because their parents don’t want them to have a MySpace or don’t know about it. I think that’s their problem. If you want to fight the man, get ready for when the man fights back.
they did here at my school along with facebook…. and i can’t check it at home cause the computer gets all messed at home
no. that’s so inappropriate. you can’t ban someone from using something at home. they’re so stupid.