August 22, 2008
-
Abandonment
A new Nebraska law will allow parents to drop their children off at the hospital with no questions asked.
This law is different than most laws in that it will allow a parent to drop a child off all the way up to anyone under 19. Some are concerned that this may lead frustrated parents to drop off misbehaving teens “or even severely disabled children” instead of just babies.
Others think it will extend protection to older kids that is given to newborn children. Here is the link: Link
Do you think a parent should be able to drop off their child with no questions asked all the way up to age 18?
Comments (101)
Yeah. Anyone who’s ever been abused by their parents should agree.
Though, I disagree with the government’s money going towards these kids. It only works if there are enough adoptive parents or free orphanages to take the kids in.
Yes. That way they can have someone pick them up and pretend to be their parent.
Ya digg?
No! I think some questions should be asked. They need to work through it. God knows my mom had a rough time with me and she made it!
Wow what is happening to this world lately? Parents abandon responsibility. It’s disgusting.
I don’t know. That seems really irresponsible of the parents and really hurtful to the children.
do you have to be a resident?
You have to be kidding me?? Wow, I’m floored by this, it’s crazy!!
NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Well, I don’t know. My parents would probably enjoy that.
Reading a few of these answers, I’m still in shock. Yanno, kids who are abused is one thing, a frustrated parent is another. I have raised 2 boys and I have been through a lot of tough times with them. Would I ever wanna get rid of them?? Hell no, wow. Thats all I can say.
Why the heck does this even have to come up.
I guess if someone is going to be such a jerk that they’d abandon their eight year old at a darn hospital, they don’t deserve to have a kid anyway.
Yeah actually…. I know there are some parents out there who think parenting is a fun thing. Then when they have children, realize its too much of a hassle. Then when some children get older, they realize they actually cost money. Other parents are just selfish. So being able to drop them off at any age is a great idea. It avoids neglect, abuse, and murder… At least this way, they have the option of being adopted…. Especially considering half the people who are parents these days…. arent cut out to be so.
Just the thought of a tiny person being alone anywhere breaks me heart.
You have found my soft spot,Dan…
I add this, though-
If someone drops off their eight year old, twelve year old, sixteen year old- they can’t change their mind later. They can’t have that kid back.
No. Absolutely not. I can totally see this be abused. This should only be for babies.
Maybe you should be able to trade in or trade up.
Hell yeah!
Yes
@fullmetalbunny - My mom would never leave any of her ten kids alone at the hospitol.
…Even the two that are over 20, haha.
What is happening to the world? Answer: Postmodernism/existentialism. Translate those “isms” it comes out as so-called “liberalism”, which is preached by TV, Hollywood, college, universities, and so-called “art”. But because the average age of the commenters on this blog are 23.73 years old ….time has more converts than reason.
Attitudes like this are simply the fruition of things like abortion etc.
This is just…. Crazy.
And cruel.
That would really fuck a kid up if their parents just took them and abandoned them like that.
wow…now it encourages more people to get away with making babies and not pay the price of their actions. blah.
Alright….I read the article. I’m not quite sure what to think – I think most abusive parents wouldn’t voluntarily give up their kids anyway – they tend to be possessive.
My problem with this article: “White said it doesn’t matter if that child is an infant or three years old or in the care of a parent or baby sitter.” WHAT? A parent can just come home one day and the baby-sitter dropped off their kid at a hospital under this safe-haven law? I’m totally confused by that one……
People today seem to have an inordinate amount of faith in doctors, hospitals and modern medicine in general.
they do it at my job all the time why not some other place.
I guess now parents don’t have to worry about being punish for neglect, they can just abandon their children at the hospital. They might as well do away with the law against neglecting children. I can also see crimes rising, maybe not every children will go that way, but I am sure there will be those going down that path.
@jillcarmel - ROFL
I think this is a great thing… there are people in the world who can’t get a break… sometimes they might just need an hour without an unruly child… If they feel they are going to do harm to the child or themselves and they need to regroup this is a wonderful way to make sure the child is safe…
I suppose it’s a good thing if it prevents children from being abused, or parents from going that far. However… I just can’t imagine a parent dropping off their child like that. Who could do that?!
Yeah, its better than abuse they may suffer at home.
If a parent really wants to drop their child off without answering any questions, are they a good parent?
Baha! Socratic method!
@angi1972 - I think this would be more permanent than “just a break.” Otherwise it’s more like a daycare center, no?
Very stupid for sure……….what we need to do is to stop BABIES from having babies…………..anymore it seems its a bang bang have a kid and give it away society……I have teens working for me that have 2 and 3 kids and they on the most part really do not give a crap and have no care in the world as to where their kids are ………want to fix the economy??????? stop the baby machines that really dont have the brains nor want the responsibility of their actions……….and have a great weekend
@revengeoftheturtleneck - The article didn’t make it sound permenant… Although I am sure in most cases it would be…
@angi1972 - The article didn’t seem to specifically say, but it sounds like it would be permanent. If it were temporary, the law would no doubt be very easy to abuse.
Can abused children drop themselves off?
Geez. What about the child? What would they think? This is the sort of thing that would scar them for life. They would also hate the system once they grow older and probably the world. Parents should be more responsible. This should not be an option.
That is just completely fucked up.
Yes. If the parent wants to drop off their teen thinking it would scare them into behavior, let them be foolish. When they’re messing around with child services, pleading for their children back, they will not think it is as good a scare tactic.
They can drop of their 17 year old daughters with me, no questions asked.
I am moving to Nebraska! Corn fed goodness and bad girls!
WTF, I am sober too!
@GhostBenjimon - You jerk, remember how your father was exploring emancipating you before he sent you to NYC to live with your mother? Remember how confusing it was, the fights, the violence, the running away, self destructing to break the cycle that seemed like it would never end?
You asshole, grow up.
@CoffeeRevolutionary - Tell Andrew I love him.
Or I will subscribe to you and comment.
@elelkewljay - Which means abortions should continue to be legal and free.
Well… my initial reaction was no, and then I thought of all the really unfit parents in the world. Not necessarily abusive ones, but ones who can’t give their kids the living they feel they deserve. And honestly, any child above the age of thirteen or so could put up a pretty good fight to stay with the parent… I don’t know.
Well if a parent is actually considering abandoning their child in the first place, they obviously are not fit parents, and should therefore not be in custody of that child. I am all for that.
Uh. NO!
That is pretty awful. I mean, a lot of people need actual help, yes, but I don’t think it’s good that a parent can just take their child and basically say, Okay now I don’t want you anymore. Just think of how that would just destroy a child’s life. A baby doesn’t know the difference, but after infancy, it’s really just cruel. Now putting a child into a program like a mental hospital or if a child is having some serious problems and needs to go into a juvinile prison or a group home for a while, that’s different. At least the child still has his or her family to come home to, and they know they are loved. But the parents decided to have the child. That comes with all the responsibility of being a mom or dad, and child abandonment does not fit into that equation, in my opinion. If they couldn’t take care of a child they should not have done the activity (sex) that caused the child in the first place.
I don’t care much for Nebraska. It’s nice of them to test the idea. =P
Responsibility cannot be abandoned. That is the most evil thing I’ve ever seen. How can anyone just drop off their child and leave them there? Maybe I just have an issue with this.
Let’s create more screwed up people in the world. Imagine yourself a child that gets dropped off at this place. Disgusting and horrible if you ask me.
As long as the child has no signs of physical/sexual abuse then yes.
The fact that Nebraska had to make a law about child abandonment says something. I think people just need to take responsibility for their actions–who abandons Life??? It’s absurd. It really breaks my heart that parents can simply abandon their children.
I mean, I guess it’s an awesome law because now kids won’t be left to die on the street or abused until forever ends…I supposed I’m for it. It’s better than abandonment without a safe haven…
but it still breaks my heart.
Hmm, somewhat.
Xo
I think it could be a good thing, depending on the situation.
I’ve had friends with abusive parents and one girl who’s gone through a mother, a much older half sister, and an uncle that have all eventually bailed on her because they were no longer capable of caring for her. She’d be better off with the state than with her homeless addict mother or her alcoholic sister or her addict uncle.
And I know if they had the option any of them probably would have left her with the state. It wouldn’t be because she was unwanted it would be because they weren’t up to the responsibility of having a kid.
There is an age where it really makes more sense for the parent to tough it out till the kid’s 18 (or i guess 19 in Nevada). I mean, if you just don’t like the money drain….there should be some questions asked but no accusations or arrests or whatever.
Outrageous !
this new law disturbs me quite a bit.
No. There need to be questions asked and resources offered.
In my state, if a parent is truly unable to provide safe care for a child for reasons other than poverty the parent can contact the local child welfare/human services department and voluntarily place their child in care. Then services are provided to the family to work to bring the family back together again in a safe manner. I believe this should be much preferred to abandoning a child at a hospital.
No! Why are we telling people that they don’t have to have any personal responsibility? It’s not ok. You can’t just up and decide “oh, I don’t want my kid anymore. I’ll just drop him off at the hospital and not deal with him anymore. Then I can do what I want.” It should be illegal in every sense of the word.
No one has dropped a kid off yet.
And you know, I’m not a parent, but I imagine that parents (abusive or not) love their children so damned much it would be hard for them to actually decide to take advantage of this law, especially when that child is over the age of 3. You have to be pretty desperate to have no one to turn to but the hospital to drop off your seven year old kid, so I am glad this law is in effect. I can see where there are loopholes, but in the end, it’s probably better that desperate parents have a place to go to help them. Parents are people, too, and sometimes children are more overwhelming that originally expected. This will save some people’s sanity, and hopefully a child’s future when a loving foster or adoptive parent takes that child in.
Become a foster/adoptive parent. It makes a world of difference for so many children everyday.
hm… in China they drop off babies, but in a much dangerous way
Yes I think they should be able to. Any parent who would just leave their child DOES NOT deserve them!! If its come to the point where a parent would actually leave them at a hospital and be done with them forever then the parent obviously has issues and needs to have the kid taken away anyway!
I could NEVER EVER NO MATTER WHAT! Ever just leave my babies like that, not in a million years! I don’t see how a good parent could…. in fact I know a GOOD parent could NOT and therefore is better off leaving the kid somewhere safe instead of it getting abused or neglected.
Oh I do however agree with k4tsuko who said some questions should be asked but no accusations or arrests or whatever made… Unless of course the child has been abused at which point I assume the parent would drop them off and leave right away, if the person would stay and answer questions about why they are leaving the kid then they need to be punished for abusing the child. If that made sense at all…
yes and no.
HECK NO! IN MY VOCABULARY. . ABANDONMENT!!!
x0x MK
Rather that than they beat them or worse.
Oh, for heaven’s sake – I moved out when I was 17… That’s a bit much. But I suppose it’s better than keeping them and beating them, or worse…
I think this is terrible in a way, because then the parent can just abandon their reponsibilities. I think a lot of parents will regret it too, because they could just drop off their kid when they’re pissed, and want them back later.
It may cut down on abuse though.
Who knows.
babies? No questions asked. In Pennsylvania we’ve had safe haven baby laws for ages and they work well.
Teens and children? SOME questions, like to determine if the problem is short-term (parent/child fight and the parent is trying to “teach a lesson”) or something like abuse.
Yes, sad as it may be, staying with the parent could be even more sad.
WOW. This makes my heart ache.
I don’t know. It suggest there is no responsibility and consequence of having a baby or getting a girl pregnant. Drop them off anytime because they can’t face up to the challenge and responsibility of being a parent. What kind of message are they trying to send to parents? On the other hand, children who being abuse by their parents sure love to take this option any time of the day.
no… that’s just…lame..
talk about abandonment issues….
plus, a baby-sitter could just be able to drop off the kid? that’s just not right….
If a parent is to that point of being willing to give up their kid for good, then it’s probably better for everyone involved that they be able to do so. I’d much rather the kid have a chance at a life with a family that actually wants them than to be emotionally/physically/sexually abused and/or neglected by parents who can’t handle parenthood.
@elelkewljay - I’d rather the parent not “pay the price” for having made a baby (other than, you know, that whole pregnant/labor/living with having given away your child the rest of your life bit), than have the child pay it by being raised by an abusive parent that doesn’t want them. Children are human beings, they should not be treated as punishments or a consequence.
I think it’s a great idea.
If the patients I work with had had that law in their childhoods, they would have endured way less abuse.
@mightymarce - You said it perfectly. Children shouldn’t be treated as a punishment. It only leads to parents resenting them and eventual abuse.
@azn_chick26 - why the hell would a babysitter drop a kid off there?
Why not call the parent? That’s a ridiculous thought.
@WiLD4SURFiNG - Some parents are not mentally or emotionally capable of caring for a child. It goes way beyond simple frustration.
You’re over-simplifying this.
No way.
They are completely taking out the responsiblity of parents.
That’s just horrible.
@la_faerie_joyeuse - I second your agument. There’s not enough funding for either new orphanages or for new incentives for adoption, so this could backfire very quickly.
too crazy
Oh ya know, my 3 year old is being really obnoxious lately…I think I’ll just drop her off and let someone else deal with her…!?!?!?!?!
Only for babies. They are going to be overwhelmed with older unwanted children who are extremely hard to place, both in foster homes and with adopted parents.
Well, obviously, the gut reaction is that it feels like an abdication of responsibility. But, if our goal as a society is to protect our young, then it is probably a better idea than dumping them on the street. How can we be a society of family values and not desire to keep our children safe, even from irresponsible parents or incompetent baby sitters. That would be much better than coming home and finding an infant or young child at home alone in the house for god knows how long. That’s if the young children were even still there and hadn’t gotten nervous and wandered off.
It might save some kids from physical or emotional abuse, though as someone already said most of the abusive parents are possessive. Some parents though, might in a moment of clarity realize what they are doing and drop their children off, there is a chance. For the children that do get dropped off it will probably save them the problems of living with parents that don’t love them or want them. They may have to go through a bit to find a new home, but maybe they’ll have a better chance that way.
@lotta_valdez - dropping off a newborn infant is way different than dropping off an older child, while a parent has already had a few years with the older child (to grow with, to discipline, to raise up especially during the child’s formative years, etc) it is the parent’s own fault for not being a better parent thus raising a child that causes much frustration. I am not speaking for mentally challenged or handicapped children. I’m talking about dumbass parents in society who continue to breed and not be responsible.
yes I do. Older kids and teens get abused and neglected just as much as newborn babies. I have seen so much on the news about older kids, say 3 or 4, getting murdered or beat almost to death.
I think that after raising a child for goodness knows how many years, just dropping them off and waving goodbye should not be an option. At least not without any questions asked. That’s disgustingly uncivil.
URG… Yes, if they have no where else to go but no if they are just lazy… well, second thought – yes… but we will be the ones paying for such things through taxes I am sure.
Can college professors drop off their underachieving college freshmen under this law? I’d support it, in that case. . . .
Seriously, the New York state law, one of the first in the country, was designed to give desperate mothers a legal means of giving up their newborns, and to protect the children’s lives. Every year in New York’s cities, infants would be discovered discarded like trash, and the legislature sought to give those women a chance to spare their children, no questions asked. (If a woman abandoned her child in the trash, and it died, she would be charged with murder.)
But I don’t think any of those legislators would have envisioned the NY law including children all the way to age 18. There are other ways to resolve that–children’s services, etc.
Just imagine how the child would feel, if a parent abandoned her at a firehouse or police station. I’m not sure a lifetime of therapy would resolve that hurt. . . .
lol…Idky this is funny to me…
The world is going madder & madder every day..
Yes. I think it shows that the parent really does love their child. Some people were never meant to be parents. Having a safe place available to these people may save the childs life, and make it possible for the person who gives the child up to get help for themselves. Too many children are dieing of neglect and abuse.
You know, I see a lot of the “Who would do that!?” in these comments, and personally, I think it’s a wonderful law.
I would much rather see a five-year-old child dropped off at a hospital, than drowned, shot, or have its arms cut off. Which are all things that have happened to children at the hands of their mothers in TX somewhere over the last ten years. Yes, being abandoned like that might scar the kid severely, but I think they’d prefer that over being dead, don’t you think? And I bet they’d still prefer it over being beaten every day by their parents.
As a matter of fact, I bet some of those kids could grow up to really appreciate that law if it was used in the correct way for them; allowing them to grow up without living in an abusive household for their whole childhood.
And I really don’t think this law is going to be used incorrectly. If someone is insane enough to abandon their child in the first place, isn’t it a good thing they have someplace to take them so that they can be found and cared for? I don’t believe you’re going to have parents who are merely frustrated with a child, but who are otherwise good parents using this law. My mom got plenty frustrated with me when I was younger, and she would never DREAM of abandoning. If you’re a good parent, you’re a good parent. If you even think that you might use this law, it might be time to see a therapist.
Well.. at least that way kids who got kicked out from home could have a better chance to have a place to stay.
Although, I think parents should just not abandon their kids to begin with.
good luck to those hospitals! i wonder how it will turn out? yes they may be overwhelmed. who knows? will be interesting to see….could help. God bless them… would like a link to go deeper
i’m not entirely sure. i’ll get back to you when i’ve reread the constitution about fundamental children’s rights.
It may save a few lives but I think it would be very devestating for a child to be left like that. I do not imagine that the child abusers are so apt to give up control of their child. I would think that it would be more of the very frustrated parents that would do that in desperation and they are the ones who will be sorry when the dust settles.
I do not think that they should be able to get the children back without extensive counseling if at all.
Honestly I agree with this. Yes it can be abused. But what if your a parent and faced with the issue that you can’t support your children? Do you let them starve or take them somewhere you know they’ll get food and a warm bed?
I agree with the earlier statement that this only works if there are enough adoptive parents and/or free orphanages.
But then again…
Most people don’t adopt within the US…they usually go to third world countries and adopt….
Those poor kids…
My parents really wanted to screw me up, so they kept me.
Ha! Is this true?! I SWEAR I’ve been championing for a law like this for nearly 3 years now!!!!! And the concern is legitimate because every time one of my kids gets on my nerves I always state, “They need to extend the Safe Haven law!” and my mother who works for CPS in Ohio is like, “It will never happen, so suck it up and be a parent.” Packing my shit now to move to Nebraska!
@WiLD4SURFiNG - I work with the mentally ill. Adults, mind you. One of my clients compulsively lies, takes in drug-addicted homeless people, and spends her money on ridiculous items before she can even buy groceries.
Her poor little son lived this life with her FOR YEARS, because his mom was not a bright enough bulb to realize she could give him to the state.
You are ridiculous to say that this is abandonment. If an abusive parent has a moment of clarity and realizes she cannot PROPERLY care for a child, she should be able to hand the child over with no questions asked.
My god, your comment angers me. You clearly do not live in the real world. And you probably had a really nice childhood. So don’t even comment me back, I have trouble taking you seriously.
@lotta_valdez - You clearly don’t know me to assume I had a really nice childhood. What a joke. Here’s my childhood background- 18 months old afflicted with Spinal Meningitis, resulting 100% hearing loss, divorced parents- mom was a drug and alcohol addict, as was the dad and he currently lives with full blown AIDS, have two younger hearing sisters and mom worked 3 jobs as a single mom trying to support us on top of everything else with her addictions and no help from the outside world- yet she did a damn good job raising the three of us to have great education, good morals and values regardless of her lifestyle. Like I said in my previous comment- with the EXCEPTION of mental illness or handicap (and that goes for adults too, but whatever). You can go cry me a river. Adults should be responsible for the children they breed or stop being such whores out there. AGAIN— speaking for irresponsible idiot adults who have no common sense- NOT mentally ill folks. *scoffs*
I don’t think this law is a bad idea. It seems that anyone that would use it should be able to abandon their children safely instead of continuing to raise them unsafely.
It is so sad that people would do this, but a distant family member of mine abandoned her son with Cerebral Palsy in a campground, it wasn’t until a few days until some other camper heard him crying. She ended up going to jail for that and her son is in protective custody–his records are sealed from her.
It breaks my heart to think that someone may not have found him and he could have died there alone like that. That’s the only reason why I don’t think it’s a bad idea,
I think its a good thing because not only will you get children who’s parents can’t take care of them, but you’ll get runaways with no place to go off the street.