March 6, 2010
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Mother Wants Son’s Sperm
A mother wants to use her dead son’s sperm in order to create her first grandchild. (Special thanks to Jo Jo for the link).
Her son was murdered but it is possible to take a guy’s sperm after he dies and use a surrogate mother to produce a baby. And that is what the mother wants to do. Here is the link: Link
Apparently this is raising ethical concerns because the sperm is taken after the guy’s death so he never gave permission.
Do you think the mother should get the son’s sperm after he is dead?
Comments (124)
No! That’s creepy!
Hmmm, let me think about that one.
No. That’s fucking creepy….unless you’re into necrophilia with incestuous undertones.
There’s something so wrong with this.
I think I’ll just leave it at creepy.
O_O
That’s weird. But if she’s not being impregnated by it, I suppose I don’t have an issue with it.
that is weird. i have never heard of something like that so i dont know how to respond
Hell NO thats not right!
That’s more than a little weird. I say no.
Monstrous!
Wow, this is a serious question. I think its wrong
That’s like…double death incest creepy shit. That’s Anne Rice level bullshit, right there.
Definitely weird.
…
And what’s up with the girls face in that picture…?
She should have to get it herself. Yes. I mean exactly what you’re thinking.
thats hawt.
I think it’s weird, but not that weird. Depends what kind of person her son was very liberal or likely to be freaked out by this.
thats really weird, especially how if the grandchild WAS born…he wouldn’t have a dad. that is very very selfish of that mother.
He should be a ghosty and tell her no.
Because that is awkward.
There are those who would argue that the ethical wall is already breached–reduced to rubble, in fact. In vitro fertilization, buying & selling human sperm, harvest aborted fetus’ for T cells, partial birth abortion–I know–I’m wandering all over the issue landscape. I’m painting with a broad brush. But–WTF? The moral fabric of Western culture is in tatters. This is a nonissue.
Upon consideration–I was half afraid the deceased’s mother was volunteering to BE the surrogate mom. I guess there’re a few ethical hurdles left to jump until the Apocalypse. Interested in starting a betting pool how on long it takes?
Your humble replier has a bad case of cynicism at the moment & is addressing his comments to the world at large. He is by & large speaking rhetorically & hopes the author of the post doen’t take anything said personally.
This should be a lesson to you mothers. Get that sperm from them while they’re still alive. It’s so much more ethical.
Now, if you told me she was going to put his sperm in herself I’d think it was super weird. But you didn’t. I guess I understand her desire to have a part of her son carry on so it doesn’t sound that weird to me.
Sure, why the fuck not?
I dunno if it’s how the article was written or not but I read the whole thing and the mother comes off creeepy. It’s like she wants to replace her son. I don’t think she should get his sperm if it wasn’t in his will (which, it obviously isn’t).
@whitetrashpoet - Exactly, agreed.
Not at all. Poor grandchild. Its father was dead before it was even conceived?
I heard about this a while ago.
It’s weird, that’s for sure.
That’s really fucking weird. And selfish. She’s not thinking of that poor child at all. Growing up without a dad is horrible.
@pianomusicchick - @PervyPenguin - @skylar_rose - @whitetrashpoet - @Drakonskyr - @larrysensation - @Unstoppable_Inner_Strength -
From what the article says, the lady wants to FIND a surrogate–not BE a surrogate. In a way, it’s akin to a case of someone braindead who left no directive. What would’ve been his intent. This will probably be the next hot legal issue.
No.
@wrybreadspread - I don’t care if she is the surrogate or finds someone else! It’s still creepy!
@wrybreadspread - Yeah, I got that from the article. Apparently he told his mother he wanted to give her a ton of grandchildren, and so she’s trying to fulfill that – sounds like a grieving mom, I feel sorry for her. But if SHE isn’t getting impregnated, I don’t think there’s a huge dilemma. Is it weird? Oh, for sure. Is it immoral? I don’t think so.
@wrybreadspread - Taking a dead man’s semen could cause half-dead babies! OH SHIIIIT! ZOIMBIES!
If a guy is dead, shouldn`t his sperm be dead as well O_o
it the son wasn’t thinking of having a child when he died, no. That’s just selfish and the mother probably just wants a grandchild to continue the family line. She’s thinking about herself and not about her son. It’s wrong and mutilating a body just for that purpose is disgusting.
Only if she is the surrogate mother.
Yeah that baby’s going to have some issues, being it known he was conceived by a dead man and all.
Ahhh science.
Yeah, make a child. Why not? Sure it’s a bit creepy but I don’t see why she should NOT be able to. He’s dead, and the body is going to her anyway.
@pianomusicchick - OSHIT. IT BEGINS!!!
The child spawned in such a way would have a hell of a time trying to comprehend why anyone would conceive a child this way. Imagine having to tell people this! That sad old woman is forgetting about the child itself; how selfish of her.
Besides, when a man or woman dies … it’s unnatural for them to “father/mother” another child. That’s not the way of Life. Just my opinion.
how old was the kid?
Hillbillies are officially entering the age of technology.
Wow. Explaining adoption is one thing, but try explaining this to a ten year old kid.
“Well, your dad died, so granny had some doctors extract his man fluids from his dead balls and inject them into some bimbo she didn’t even know, ten years later here you are.”
It depends on if the mother knew her son well enough to know that he would have wanted this. Did they ever discuss it? People should put stuff like this in a living will.
But according to the article, “critics lambasted her for being unmarried, for her lack of formal religion…” These critics were totally out of line. Kids may tend to do better when their parents are married, but frankly, there’s a 50/50 chance that married parents will get divorced, and single parents usually do just fine. Her lack of formal religion has absolutely nothing to do with the issue at hand. Her grief may cause her not to think objectively, rationally, and ethically, but clearly, these biases are happening on both sides.
I read a novel where a lady has a kid after her husband dies.
But that is way creepy. Who would even think of that?
Oh I heard about this on the news. Craziness.
I feel bad for this mother. They had an episode like this on Strong Medicine but the wife wanted it & the parents said no but since he was married, she had the right to decide. I see no problem with it. If I lost my child & I could keep some part of him/her with me, I probably would.
Sure.
I vote creepy.
Now why isn’t this in the works of Shakespere or someone?
I don’t think you should be taking personal anythings from dead people…
That’s really disturbing.
Was he an organ donor?
Depends on his age, if he was a minor, sure. This would be so much better if she wanted to use her own egg(s) with the sperm, though.
That is so gross.
I understand the grief, but I think it’s unethical to take the sperm from a dead man.
My problem with this is that he did not give permission. We only have her word that he said he would give her grandchildren. We only have her word for anything.
If a man agreed to allow the harvest of his sperm should he die, then I wouldn’t see a problem with it. I’d still want permission in writing, though.
And did anyone read far enough into the article to see that she can’t even pay for this procedure? “We are looking into medical grant programs,” she says. Pay for your own freaky nonsense, woman.
i think if he did not give her permission to take his sperm, then she has no right to take it.
T.T just wrong
Ethical or not, she seems a little mentally unstable. Maybe this woman shouldn’t have a grandchild.
He wasn’t using it
At least she’s not planning to implant the sperm into herself. Ewww. Now *that* would be unethical.
Um…I don’t think that child would want to be able to say that when he was conceived, his father was actually dead. o.o I don’t exactly think this is a good idea.
@funny_guydude - How could you be sure that the woman would pick a bimbo for her grandchild’s mother? Hope she’s still sensible enough to pick a good woman.
But in any case this is disturbing. I think it’d be easier to just move on……. =S
She sounds like a “Devouring Mother” btw, judging from the extreme closeness and inability to let go.
I don’t think it really matters, since he’s dead.
Is it weird, yes. Will it hurt anyone, no.
Let her do it, even if she’s a fucking creep.
Eww…. that’s beyond creepy. Honestly, if not just because of the creepy “taking sperm from a dead son” thing, think of the child!!!! How will he grow up normally with that type of history following him all his life??
Did her son have a girlfriend? A wife? No? Then why in the world would this make sense?
Ugh. No… creepy.
he’s dead, he won’t care.
and what would you tell the child? oh you were born from your dead father’s sperm to a woman he never knew? mental issues waiting to happen with that one.
It’s real creepy, but I don’t necessarily think she needs permission to do that. I understand that it doesn’t belong to her, but I would assume that had he voiced a desire to have children, it would be ethical.
How’s that for a conversation starter, though? “My child’s father was dead before fertilization.”
Weird.
How the heck would you explain something like that to the kid later on in life?
Who would take it?
Incest >_<
Oh this is so weird! But as long as she has plans to look after the baby, I guess it would be ok?
That is just wrong, in my opinion.
GordyC
I don’t know.
why not?
I say go for it.
weird weird weird….
@rachelparsley - right on
I can completely understand why she wants it and, well, I don’t see much wrong with it.
@Drakonskyr - I don’t know if Anne Rice would stoop so low
How bout thats all ten types of creepy/weird that I’ve never even heard of and now that I’ve heard it I’m kinda creeped out. I mean hell WHO does that?? I think she has some other deeply rooted issues one of them is NOT BEING ABLE TO LET GO! The man is dead and no amount of sprem will be able to bring him back EVER.
no
I think it’s rather creepy. I understand her son is gone and she wants a piece of him to carry on, but how would one explain that to the child later?
hopefully the kid doesn’t end up with the father’s dead gene.
Eww! No way! Not only is she’s having a dead person’s child, but she’s having her SON’S child! I just find that creepy. But I guess it wouldn’t be that bad if she had a surrogate mother deliver the baby. Although, how would you explain that to the kid? “Son, your big brother is also your father. Oh, and you were conceived after he died.” Never mind, I’ve decided it’s a bad idea all together.
@whitetrashpoet - yeah she’s not getting impregnated but using a surrogate mother. But is this going to be the traditional surrogacy where the surrogate is the child’s genetic mother, where I see no problem with, or does the grandmother plan on using one of her own eggs for gestational surrogacy? Gross! I hope not, because then that would be risking birth defects, but I doubt the law would let that happen anyhow!
As long as she isn’t using it on herself, I think she should be allowed. I mean, yeah, it’s a bit creepy, but it that kind of situation…it depends on the person.
Kinda odd..
I understand that she wanted grandchildren, but this seems insane. Bless this woman’s heart for the lost of her child, but she doesn’t have other kids to pester about to give her grandchildren? I could be more supportive of this if maybe the son said sure this would be acceptable before his death, but the thing is, we can’t and will never know if he were to be okay with this.
Did he mark himself as a donor? Some lawyer might use that and say that she has the right since he marked on the back of his driver’s license he was a donor. It could happen.
If it does, men and women will have to sign little things saying (yes, I will donate my sperm and eggs when I die).
It won’t matter. The courts will see her as crazy and will throw the whole thing out.
I really don’t see any problem with this whatsoever. It’s just sperm.
I don’t understand why people are so quick to say something is morally wrong just because it’s unusual.
For example, if I ever decided to have a baby, I would much rather have a little clone of myself. It seems much better than having to combine my genetic material with someone else’s.
NO! Parents have no right to make reproductive choices for their adult children. Her son is dead- how is it okay to use his sperm to create a child when he has absolutely no say in the matter?
Besides. If it’s okay for a mother to harvest her dead son’s sperm, what’s to stop a different mother from harvesting her live son’s sperm? Say, from her 12-yr-old son or an adult son in a coma? Would THAT be okay? I hope not.
@LauraG0929 - She got jizz in her eye
So does this mean that if you DON’T want your sperm/eggs harvested postmortem, you have to put it in your will!? How many people are actually going to think of that?
total fail.
Hahahahahaha!!! Dan, you win the “bringing readers in with the title alone” award for this month.
I think we should put this in perspective. This is no worse than people like octomom getting IVF. With things like abortion pills and sperm/egg transplants… what’s wrong with a dead mans sperm making a baby? A bit creepy, sure.
I think if surrogacy is the greatest gift ever, then this should be next on the list. Then again, this opens a brand new legal door, which is what really scares me.
…that kid will have a difficult time explaining his family someday..
And…I basically love the picture for this entry.
Well… it is doing something to his body that he didn’t say was okay…. but I can understand how she feels, I guess. I don’t know. Maybe this is a scenario that people will have to consider when writing wills and all that other “death prep” stuff. If I would have never had children, and my parents couldn’t stand the loss of me, especially also meaning the loss of potential grandchildren… I’d be fine with something like this (of course, being a woman I doubt my eggs would still be functional after I died.. but I have no clue).
Disturbing and emotionally sickening.
Gross. No, because that’s obviously a violation of privacy. If I was a man who died, I would not want my mom violating my dead body to create a little boy or girl who won’t have a father. I guess it’s just tough luck.
Wow, that’s weird. I’d say no because the kid would be screwed up knowing he was conceived when the dad was already dead. How weird.
It’s not like she’s going to use it for herself but a surrogate. What’s wrong with that?
WTF? That’s just disgusting. She needs serious professional help.
I’ve gotta say no on this one.
thats so wrong. nooooo!
Yes, but only if she gathers it herself.
Some things need to stay private in the family.
I have some ethical questions with this, but the strongest thing I get from the article is that this woman is trying to raise up another Nikolas to replace the one she lost. I would expect that this child will face lifelong pressure to head to UCLA Film School, to listen to the same music styles and wear the same clothing styles as the father he’ll never know. In other words, this isn’t about the child, and it isn’t about the deceased son. It is all about the mother’s grief and what she imagines will relieve it.
@Drakonskyr - That’s what I was thinking.
I suppose this would beg other questions 1) Was he married when he died? 2) Would he have wanted that? 3) She should ask herself what her true intent is…and see about grief counseling…then decide if this is still what she wants. It sounds like she is having a hard time getting beyond her son’s death…and who WOULDN’T have a hard time with that anyway…but if she is not doing it for the right reasons then in the long run it may not be the best thing for the “child to be”… Just my two cents, anyway…
After initial post, I read the entire article, obviously he was not married…oops…but the rest still applies…
He never gave his spermission?
i dont think that it is right b/c not only will the child never now his father he will not have a mother either b/c the sperm would be placed into a surrogate mother either. but i think that if the grandmother wants to do it then why not.
As long as she’s not collecting the sperm herself.
You might but mine is tried & old and I am afraid they just could not make the trip!
That’s wrong.
@borderlinecase - I am sure because it was my joke. In my jokes, things always happen the way I say.
I’m not sure how I would feel about that if I was the kid. It could be said that the child was never meant to exist in the first place (if you believe in fate and all that).
there are “walks” organized every day in order to raise funds for every kind of malady. Perhaps there could be a walk organized to raise funds to provide therapy for this woman. The blow of her loss is something I can’t imagine, but in my bones her demand is obsessive and absurd.
don’t ask, don’t tell?
This women has a real problem dealing with life as the normal people do. She is a dementited if she wants to do this. No she does not have the right.
@OhItWontBeForever - I couldn’t have said it better myself.
I don’t think it’s creepy or wrong. It’s not as if she’s violating her son. She is upset, she wanted to see him live a good life, settle down and have a family, so she in turn could see his children, and be happy that she raised him well. Unfortunately, his life was taken from him by force. If any emotion I feel on the subject it’s sympathy.
What a crazy way to create a son child !, My question is , how popular this method could result among lots of women who want to be mothers, I saw a similar case on the news paper, it was the article near the picture of a Cheap Viagra.