April 12, 2010
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Do You Have an STD?
You know what I have always wondered? How do people bring up the conversation of STDs (Sexually Transmitted Disease)?
I did not have sex until I was married. So the conversation never came up. But I would think that the whole conversation would be awkward.
I have always wondered how a person brings it up. I know that they teach you in sex ed to talk about it. But when does it come up? Do you just ask the person, “I was thinking about having sex with you. Do you have any STDs?”
I would think it would ruin a moment. Do you ask, “Are you the type of woman I should wear a condom for?” I would think it would kill the romance. Plus in order the ask the question, you are almost assuming that you will in fact have sex. So how do you slip in the question?
Have you ever asked a potential partner if he/she had an STD (sexually transmitted disease)?
Comments (120)
STDs are FRIGHTENING. I’m pretty sure most people have herpes, they just don’t talk about it, so they give it to more unsuspecting people…and it goes on and on. Partly why I’ve only been with one guy. You never know.
Awkward +5
Is pregnancy a sexually transmitted disease?
An STD.
I’ve done this….it’s not easy, but it has to be done so you can stay safe. I usually just say “I have something to ask you…..I hope you won’t be offended…..”, then blurt it out.
Yes. One out of every two sexually active people will get an STD before 25. I learned that as I was doing my project about birth control. It’s scary. Better have an awkward few moments than an STD your whole life.
I’ve only ever slept with my husband (although we didn’t wait till marriage, sigh). It was never anything either of us worried about.
@andfeud - No, but life is.
I don’t have any STDs… yet, but there is hope! I hope I get a cool one, because I’m too much of a pussy/too fastidious to get a tattoo.
I always ask people
Dan, do you have an STD? If so, are you willing to share?
I made them get tested first, and I always get tested after having a new partner.
i’ve only had one sexual partner. it has never come up–the question. i would imagine it to be awkward if one had to ask. no, i am no religious freak. it just worked out that way
I have been married to the same woman for 54 years and we married virgins. I am not worried, but I guess this young generation has every reason to be worried and to discuss sexually activity with great care.
You love me, Dan
I think the best way to handle the question is posting it on their Facebook wall, so that you’re not in the moment when you ask.
No. Damn proud to be a virgin not interested in sex.
I heard there was a guy who deliberately lied about having HIV and gave it to a handful of women. Sucks, but even if you ask, people can still lie and you’ll never know.
Most people I know are comfortable enough joking about it but they can’t get serious about the subject … it’s really just awkward. I myself never shy away from it, just because I know it’s physically impossible for me to have an STD, so I can just say NO when asked, lol. + I’m never in the situation where I have to ask.
STD’s are passed through many or all bodily fluids. I usually brought it up with guys when we were still in the “talking” phase before we ever started dating. A parent who’s not careful could give one to their offspring even, how terrifying is that thought? STD’s don’t just pass through sex.Talk about it before it has the chance to get awkward when you’re still doing background checks on one another.
Never had one and I plan to keep it that way. Before sexing I usually grab the girl by the shoulders and demand to know what her intentions are. Is she there for pleasure or is she’s plotting to destroy my perfect blood.
i’m scared of std’s. i don’t have any and neither does my boyfriend (we’re both virgins/haven’t been with other people), but it still freaks me out
@Rob_of_the_Sky - lmao
i’ve only been with one guy ever, and we were both virgins when we started having sex so it wasn’t a conversation that we ever had to have.
if we did though i probably would’ve been like @eclecticapunkqueen22 did and just blurt it out and hope for the best.
most people however don’t know that you don’t need to have had sex to get an std. sounds weird, i know, but a lot people get herpes type I by something as simple as kissing, that’s why you always need to be careful.
Yeah, but we were using a condom at the beginning anyway, so it wasn’t really a problem.
I said i wasn’t feeling well so he started asking me if i had a cold, the flu, swine flu, hiv, aids… progressed like that.
I ask, “When was the last time you were tested?”
When I start to have partners, I will be asking & testing since you can get stuff or be born with something & not know.
I hate when people assume if someone caught an STD, they’re sleeping around. That’s not the case all the time. Now if someone was infected MULTIPLE times…that’s a red flag.
i ask myself that question every night before i sleep with myself.
I’ve never had one and I’m damn proud of it, it’s sad when I have to consider that as an accomplishment, lol.
I’ve never asked anyone and I probably shouldn’t have trusted condoms so much back in the day, but it all worked out okay in the end.
I usually perform a full exam and sniff test before anything funky happens..
My husband and I married each other as virgins… I know we are not the norm… we talked about it all though long before we were married back when we were dating. Akward? yes Necessary? yes
I’m a virgin
so I personally don’t have to worry about me spreading an std. I’m planning on waiting until I get married, but I do, when I’m dating someone, casually ask them about their previous sexual experiences then make jokes about stds to see what comes up. I do it in a sly way so they don’t realize that I’m trying to figure it out and in a way where they feel comfortable talking to me about it.
….I dont think I should answer this question.
No I do not.
I not only asked, but sent him off to the doctor to be tested. It would be WAY more awkward to have to talk about it after I had caught something from him.
Nope – never had a reason for that conversation. But when we order our prescriptions from the mail-order pharmacy service our insurance company forces us to use (grr!) the label has a huge “STD” stamped in the corner. I know it stands for standard mail delivery, and I know the post office employees know that, but it bothers me all the same.
I never really asked unless it developed into an actual relationship – I just wrapped that shit up.
When I wasn’t in a relationship, I always made sure if I thought it would lead to that, that both of us got tested. Better safe than sorry…
I went on a first date with a guy and he just came right out and told me without me even asking. I was a virgin at the time and appreciated his honesty. I did continue to date him, but we never did much physically. Then he broke up with me…go figure. But at least i’m STD free!!!
Are we counting Christianity as a sexually transmitted disease?
I’m not sure if it’s an STD or not, but I’ve caught a dose of astonishment at the number of people above who’ve lead such quiet lives. Do you think that perhaps spending a lot of time blogging a good sanitary barrier?
@OngishLyOngLee - hehehehe
virgeeeeen.
@OngishLyOngLee - loool. I like you.
Just wear a condom. And use the earwax test!! lolol
I’ve told past boyfriends to get tested before they can touch me. Awkward, yes. But I’d rather have a moment of awkwardness than herpes.
Even if someone says they don’t one, are you going to just trust their word?
Haha, well, it’s definitely better to bring it up and have some awkwardness beforehand than to find chancre sores later. I think people are very quick to judge others with STIs. Maybe they made mistakes in the past, but to err is human. Just because someone has an STI doesn’t mean they are no longer worthy of another person’s love. I wouldn’t mind if my partner had one, so long as he’s honest about it.
No, and the blood test answered any questions that might have come up later.
If it’s going to be with your future gf/bf it is easier to ask then. Because you plan on doing it with them in the future. Talking about that persons sexual history (or yours) during a cup of coffee or a late night phone call, then proceding to ask “have you ever gotten a STD?” like it was something that just popped in your head.
If it was someone you just met.. I don’t think your thinking about STDs much since your already so gung ho for the coitus. The best you could do is just wear a condom. lol.
You can probably get away with a Friends with benefits or a BF/GF and above. But when your skeezin your bound to get a STD.
I’ve only ever slept with one person. And we’ve been married for nearly 6 years…. so…. not a conversation we’ve ever had to have.
You should always ask. I realize that for one night stands it does ruin the mood, so just make sure to wear protection. But if you’re friends or in a relationship always have the talk first and always use a condom anyway. I just bring it up like I’m asking about the weather. They could lie because they just want sex so always use a condom. You never know who has been with who and who those people have been with and they could always lie about that as well.
While playing video games together, you casually stretch and say (a little too loudly) “BOY AM I GLAD I AM A VIRGIN, SO I DON’T HAVE TO GET CHECKED…” Then you just hope for them to spill their condition.
@the_rocking_of_socks - Truth.
Well Dan, this seemed like a silly post, since neither you nor your commenters seemed to have any experience in the area! That said, responsible, educated sexually active adults, like myself, get tested regularly, and ask the reasonable questions before sex with a new partner:
Should we use a condom?….have you been tested for anything recently? Insist on a condom until he/she has & the tests are in and make your own judgements about whether you want to use them after that.
Almost everybody in my age group has had something …I have oral herpes I, but haven’t had an outbreak since I was a teenager. So No one cares, but I disclose anyway? Get the picture?
If you can’t talk openly about stds, you’re not on an intimate enough level to have sex! If its a one-nighter, just use a condom.
if i was planning on having multiple partners, this is a question i would ask.
as man others said, better to have an awkard moment for a couple seconds than herpes for the rest of your life.
If you aren’t asking then you are just playing roulette with yourself.
this is a great point for waiting until marriage to have sex, especially since you can already have an STD before you know you do and give it to a partner. if someone knows they have an STD, the responsible thing is to let the other person know before they have sex and make sure they take the necessary steps to keep from spreading it. unfortunately the sex game is often a “looking out for me” kind of thing so those who have them aren’t always upfront about it. if you play with fire, you will get burned!
Yup. I’ve also flashed a smile and said, “You’re going to have to get paperwork to prove it.” ♥
I’ve never asked or been asked, because I always (ok, usually) wait until I know a decent bit about a person before I sleep with them. I always use a condom until we have that talk though. It’s not as awkward as you think. Usually the guy’ll ask if he can go without a condom, and then I’ll ask them the last time they were tested, etc. You should really go get tested with your partner, and trade “scores”.
I once messed around with a guy that stopped me half way to tell me he had genital warts in the past. It killed the romance a bit, but I also really respected him for bringing it up. So it evened out! I didn’t end up sleeping with him… ha!
I’m a virgin and so is my bf
so no STDs for us
“I didn’t have sex until I was married.”
BORING!
being worried about it,I was totally scared about to have sex,so still being a virgin
Well I never just have sex at a random party or anything. If I’m going to sleep with a person for the first time it’s almost always pre planned or at least so obvious that we’re going to do it that the subject of STI’s just comes up. And I’m usually very blunt about it: “You don’t have any STI’s or anything I can get from you, right?”
Though depending, if I don’t feel comfortable with the person I usually don’t sleep with them anyways, even if they are clean.
Great question; been meaning to post on this, myself!
@OngishLyOngLee - and what in of answer did yourself give?
I’ve only slept with two women in the past 30 years, and I was married to both of them. I’d hate to go through all the fear and loathing of sex with someone unknown, and the tree of sexual partners they’ve had.
It is an awkward question. But asking, “Did I catch THIS from you?” is 100x more awkward I think.
I have asked my partners prior to my husband. I approached it when we are still dating and learning about each other prior to initiation of a physical relationship and I would always ask “If they had ever been tested for STDs.” and that’s how I would find out. I did have one ex boyfriend who had never been tested, but did get tested after that conversation. You can never be too careful with your genitals. :)
Its called an STI now because of a broader range of meaning. xP
Whats the point in asking?…. It’s not like they are honestly going to say ohh yes, I have herpes want some? If you are one of those people that “hookup” with strangers thats just the risk you take.
If you’re not in a 100% monogamous relationship with someone who has been tested STD-free, you SHOULD be using protection anyway. So, when the moment arrives to get out the protection, that’s the moment when you discuss it. If it’s too awkward for you, you probably shouldn’t be having sex to begin with…
you just ask, usually as the clothes are coming off, at that point, I don’t know what it takes to reverse the situation, but even that question doesn’t do it. Condoms work when properly used.
Most responsible and health conscious adults do.
That’s a weird question to ask but nowadays better be safe than sorry…
yes, I usually just come right out and ask them. Better to be straight than to regret it later…
I was raped, and my rapist gave me herpes. So, it hurts when people say only sluts get herpes, or people that sleep around. When I feel close enough to someone, I will tell them. It’s not something I talk about much. But, the guys that were still interested afterwards, I give them all the information. The fact that herpes is still transmitted even with a condom on and such. For me, it’s a very, very hard conversation to have with someone. It reminds me of the night of hell I went through. Plus, my rapist was my boyfriend at the time, so it’s like a double whammy.
It breaks my heart everyday. People saying they’re proud to be clean, yadda yadda. It’s good to be proud but I wish I would of had that chance. I wish I was given a chance. Even other rape victims/ survivors come out clean (the majority of them).
So, whenever I say herpes, type it, hear it, or see it, it is like a shot in the gut.
lmao…well I think you should wear a condom regardless. But, if you are not sure, you could suggest that you both get tested. Say some crap about how much you cherish what you have and you want to be able to go to the next level with no risks..and still wrap it up, cuz if it’s not an STD you’ll catch it’ll be a little bundle of joy….and that lil guy will last a lifetime.
STD’s are so 2000. It’s STI’s now… (Sexually Transmitted Infections).
Normally, around the time we start talking about sex, I ask if she gets tested. Unfortunately, the reply generally is something vague about their gyno visits, which never having been to one I know nothing about. So I just take it as a yes, assume they’re a compulsive lair and one of those people who like to collect STDs and spread them to unsuspecting victims and follow it up with a trip to the clinic. You want to talk about awkward. Try holding a conversation in the STD clinic waiting room. It’s a nice little social experiment.
Still STD free, and not shy at all to ask about it. A little comedy goes a long way too.
SURVEY SAYS, YES I HAVE IN AN INDIRECT FASHION, HEHE……
yes i did and i still would. i am very blunt and would just say “do you have an STD?” i asked my husband on the first date. and i have done it before on first dates as well… it made me never get one
in my opinion it weeded out potential mates.
Wow! Not a single “STD’s are like Pokemon” joke. I’m almost shocked.
When someone catches an STD, it isn’t necessarily because they were being promiscuous. It could just mean that they weren’t careful enough; got caught up with the wrong person (that’s why I’m glad I’m such a prude. I don’t want anyone’s germs)
But the sooner you realize that and keep it in mind, the easier it will be for you to bring the conversation up without feeling awkward. It’s better to talk about it in advance than to just take such a risk because then, that would just be stupid… not that everyone is just gonna admit to having an STD.
Are you the type of woman I should wear a condom for?
I laughed so hard when I read that.
You can get things without even knowing you have them…and years later, they come back to haunt you. I contracted HPV (#16–a high risk of cervical cancer strain) from a guy that I was with–and it only took once. One time without protection, one time…one mistake. I didn’t sleep with anyone else until the man I’m currently with, and the guy who gave me HPV was my first. I think I’m the poster child for “It only takes one time”. I’m lucky I didn’t get anything else. Not that this isn’t serious. Seriously though, don’t trust someone when they say they don’t have anything, because they may not know. He didn’t because HPV isn’t really detectable in men. Just get yourselves tested…that’s the only sure way to know whether or not you’ve got anything. Better safe than sorry.
Nice pic Dan
Yep. It’s really not that weird since your partner will probably be asking you the same question if they think of it first…
“Hey, just making sure, you’ve been tested and are STD free right?”
Simple. The best though is when you ask to actually see the document that declares them STD free…
well If you are that scared to bring it up then you prob. shouldnt be engaging in the sexual act to begin with.
first off, if you are talking about a one night stand…then you should expect the worse. Hence, why you should always use a condom.
second, if its with someone you have been serious with and are thinking of finally taking it to that next level than I think you both should be able to sit down and have a conversation about it. Not so much how many peoples he’s been with or bluntly asking does he have an STD but just casually bring up going to get tested together. So its not being presumptuous per say but just cautious. You only have one life and one body. You have the right to know and a little awkwardness should be nothing compared to the worries you will have during the act if your mind is constantly wondering if he has an STD. And then the STRESS that comes with a broken condom…….thats the worst.
It’s alright to ask. Remember you do have the right to do so.
But, if you are really trully worried about it then you will refrain from promiscuous sex altogether. The best way to prevent getting any STD’s or preggers is abstinence. thats the way it is.
I did not have sex before marriage either, but I did date this one guy who, before becoming a Christian, had been quite promiscuous at a creepily young age. He used me as his personal confessional booth to tell me every sordid detail of his past. If he’s going to tell me all this, and then hint towards marriage, I darn well wanted to know. (Good thing I didn’t marry him; he had issues.) I casually said, “So did you ever catch anything?”
He said he had not.
I asked, “So you got tested and everything?”
He said, “No, but I was so young that most of the girls I had sex with were virgins or had not been having sex very long.”
Hmm. Not good enough for me. I filed that one away and decided Mr. Prodigal was going to get tested before he got any action from me. Luckily it didn’t last long enough to get serious, although I worried I could get herpes from kissing him since he’d gone down on so many girls.
What is it with you and sex?
No need for the question to be awkward. If you’re gonna do grown up things, you should probably be able to ask grown up questions.
Use condoms unless you really trust the person is my general rule, but I don’t do it even with a condom if i don’t have a good idea about the person’s history.
I still ended up getting HPV because my boyfriend’s exgirlfriend cheated on him behind his back (and they were virgins when they met, so…) But it went away, so it’s all good.
People freak out so much about STDs, but most of them aren’t any different than any other disease you get from human contact. I mean.. mono? menangitis? HIV, obviously, is very serious, but menangitis can be too, but nobody flips their shit about it.
It all comes back to “HOW DARE PEOPLE HAVE SEX AND NOT BE ASHAMED!!”
@everlastte - Uh where did you get that information?
That means most married couples share STDs thus making even in cases of monogamy STDs would be unavoidable.
i have asked… you don’t ask during the moment.. it’s better to ask way beforehand lol. if you two are planning to do something. i’ve asked over AIM.
It’s simple; you just have to say “hey, I really like you and I would like to take our relationship further, but I don’t get involved with someone unless I know they’re clean, so if you want to be with me, you’ll have to get tested”
If they refuse to do it, then it’s kind of obvious they have something.
@andfeud - Yes, it is, and a very expensive one at that, in which the bills for treatment just mount and mount and mount. 18 years later you’re still paying through the nose for this terrible, terrible disease, but somehow, YOUR EXTENDED FAMILY IS PROUD OF YOU FOR BITING THE BULLET. Go figure.
It is an environmentally incorrect disease as well, just look around you at this planet and you will see.
As with bubonic plague, rodents are involved (namely, rug rats.)
Sometimes high SAT scores after many years of treatment, help comfort the families of the victims of this disease.
You see, they take what looks like a giant Q-tip and shove it into the end of your junk.
No wonder people don’t like being tested…
It is like crossing the street. Look before you take that first step…
Initially when I tell people I have herpes, they all assume I have sores in and around my vulva. I do not. I promise. However, I do get sores on my mouth.
I know in my case it isn’t an STD or STI or what ever it is called these days, but it is always funny to break in new friends by telling them I have herpes. Fun stuff, cold sores!
@FoliageDecay - http://www.sadd.org/stats.htm#stds That’s what I found for my paper. I googled it too and you can also find that fact here http://www.stdinformation.net/ and here http://www.pregnantteenhelp.org/articles63.html, the second which I also used for my project.
I didn’t look over STDs for my project, just the statistics for another point I was making. But I think there’s some that you won’t have your whole life, and you can get rid of.
I heard a lot of people just lie about serious STDs so they can still get laid. I don’t know if that’s too common but it’s scary to think about especially since i’m a bit of a hypocondriac (sp?)
I only had sex with my current boyfriend.
You only have to ask. Why be shy? or anything like that when your life can be ruined?
They shouldn’t get bothered by it. It”ll be the perfect time for them to ask you as well.
I believe in healing and restoration so even it could be an issue it’s nothing that can’t get healed.
OH. Well, if you aren’t a childish fucking prude who’s capable of reading the signals given to you by your partner, you ask them straight up when they’ve been tested last time.
There’s nothing wrong with having an STD? Like another commenter said, some people are born with them. Some people are raped and catch STDs that way. Some people have sex with a long-term partner that was cheating on them, and then they have to deal with their partner’s irresponsibility.
It’s… not that hard to ask, and it’s something that any mature adult should deal with it.
normally, i ask before i have sex. i just kind of slip it in as a, “you’re clean, right?” not always effective, but sometimes it can also be inserted during casual flirtation. you just have to find the right moment to slip in a, “but you don’t have anything right? you’re clean? cuz that would be kind of weird if you weren’t”
im 17, and the first time i had sex i caught Chlymadia, a STI(sexually trasmitted infection).
he told me he had it 2 weeks after we started having sex when i was complaining with symptoms.
i never thought about possibly catching a sti after having unprotected sex, because i thought it wouldnt happen my first time,
luckily enough i got pills and im clean now, but if he wouldnt had told me, i wouldnt had been able to have kids :/
It’s called STI now, Sexually Transmitted Infection.. Who knows why they changed the name so many times. : It’s just that bad the first time. Anyways. I think it might be best to slip the question before you get down and dirty. And it’s better to be in a monogamous relationship, safer to know.
I don’t think the question assumes that the two will have sex, though it is certainly a delicate question. I suppose if someone is sharing how they have had a number of partners, the question could possibly be posed if done tactfully. There would definitely have to be a high level of trust and open communication in the relationship though.
@eclecticapunkqueen22 - The question is
o you trust her if she says no?
@everlastte - Part of the confusion in the conversation is that when people talk about STDs they all assume they are permanent incurable STDs. While I imagine there would be plenty of temporary illnesses like colds and such that can be transferred sexually–but don’t carry the strength of concern that we’d normally associate with the term STD.
“I would think it would ruin a moment.”
Gee…You’re right. Because it’s oh-so-much-less awkward to have to explain to a new partner, later, that you contracted venereal warts, AIDS, hepatitis, or herpes all because you didn’t want to spoil the mood with the last person you screwed by asking awkward questions.
DUH
If you are adult enough to have sex, then for god’s sake be adult enough to have an open and honest conversation with potential partners about contraception and STDs.
@FoliageDecay - Right. I read that many come in contact with an STD, but that didn’t necessarily mean that they’re going to have it for life since many there are things you can do about them. I think people get nervous because of the word ‘disease’ in there, now they’re changing it to STI’s, sexually transmitted infections (though that sounds weird). But you’re right about that. Even if it’s not forever, it’s still scary, so best to get tested to get rid of it early.
The problem with STDs is more than just a matter of whether it’s “curable” or not. Even the curable STDs can cause huge problems, especially to females. Many STDs can go undetected in women for a long time and then, by the time they start showing symptoms, they’ve infected who knows how many other partners and perhaps even done damage to their future fertility. Some forms of STD also increase a woman’s risk of getting cervical cancer, later in life (like HPV). A mother who has undetected herpes (and yes, sometimes it can occur inside where the woman may not know it’s there) can pass it on to her new born infant, as she delivers it and it can blind and even kill the infant. I had a friend who was telling me how she got herpes in college, but how it was “no big deal because she didn’t get breakouts anymore”. Then, about five years later, she got shingles and was in all kinds of pain. It was a result of the herpes. The doctor told her that many people who get herpes, get shingles when they get older.
Do not underestimate the damage STDs (or STIs for those who prefer euphemisms) can do…even the so-called curable ones. Contracting an STD is not like catching a cold. It sounds scary because it IS scary and in this more sexually open society, it’s more important now, than ever, to understand what’s out there and be able to talk about it like real grownups. This is what my husband and I preach to our kids on a regular basis. You only have one body and one life…don’t be a jackass and screw up your health and fertility in a moment of youthful passion…it’s not worth it.
We were joking around and I just go – So is there anything I should be worried about? I’m not gonna catch anything from you am I? – He told me the truth and it was fine.. I guess it just depends on your relationship with the person.
Yes, I have asked previous partners. I even asked my husband when we were dating. I was always paranoid of some one lieing though.
My human biology teacher told us that you can get HIV even if you use a condom because the virus is smaller than the actual pores of the condom. So yea, wearing a condom still won’t protect you.
wow props to you guys for marrying as virgins
@Unstoppable_Inner_Strength - That’s what you think!
Donate blood and date from the donor pool. Just kidding. Sort of.
On a serious note: I demanded a raincoat until two years’ worth of clean came through [and, yeah, did the blood donation thing].
Astroglide is a Godsend.
Gee, that was awkwardish. I wonder if I’ll have the gall to hit the Submit button?
@TheMarriedFreshman - Ha! I’m 35 and I’ve never been married. Boring is the right word had I still been waiting to have sex. To each his own, but in my view, it’s ridiculous and stupid to wait until marriage. The first time I’ve had sex with each of my partners has been at least a bit awkward, especially the very first time ever. Many of my friends confirm this, and also from second hand accounts of people they know and such. So, this dream of a magical first night is nothing but a fairy tale that doesn’t reflect reality at all.
@Unstoppable_Inner_Strength - Who said anything about first nights? Like you said, first nights are bound to be less than ideal, regardless of your convictions about sex. I was more addressing the idea that having sex with only one person your whole life is boring. I’ve been having sex with my husband for nearly six years and it is NOT boring. I love it.
We keep getting better and better. 
:p
I’m not gonna touch the age thing. We just would not see eye to eye on that, and since I got married when I was 19, I doubt you’d be interested in what I have to say in the first place!
@TheMarriedFreshman - I believe that a bit of experimentation, and trying out a few different people (with strict precautions) is very healthy. I would certainly not want to go back and erase my past and make it so that it’s only one partner for my whole life.
In any case, my comment was to tease Dan. I meant what I said, but it’s not to be taken that seriously.
@Unstoppable_Inner_Strength - Oh I know you were teasing! I’m still having fun with it, I’m not trying to be snarky or whatever. Sex is a topic that I love to talk about. Unfortunately, it tends to be easier to talk about it with perfect strangers than with anyone I actually know. :p
And having never experimented with anyone else, I have to say that for me, one partner is perfect. ^_^
@Made2Order - i don’t kiss and tell!
Yeah, I’ve asked. I’ve also asked about how many sexual partners he has had, and if he’s had a same-sex experience. It is a little awkward, but I’m only protecting myself. If a person isn’t mature enough to ask and answer those questions, they probably aren’t mature enough to be having sex.
It’s probably best to ask that stuff long before you’re actually in the moment. That would be a mood killer!