June 21, 2010

• Xanga 2020 How Did They Turn Out

  The year is 2020 – How did everyone on xanga turn out?

  
  Seedsower:  In ten years… she will publish a book of portraits of famous xangans….then and now.

  Ricebunny:  She took over youtube and renamed it “Phantube.”

  Cakalusa:  He continued to provide the important service of keeping boobs on xanga.

  Joanna_said_So:  She became the next Martha Stewart with her own cake baking and decorating program.

  DearRicky:  He was able to walk again because a cure was found for his Duchenne Muscular Dystrophy.

  Zerowing21:  He converted to Christianity and served God faithfully in the Church.  He married Megan and they had 7 children.  He also wrote the best selling book, “How to be a Christian and think Intellectually.”

  Trunthepaige:  She became rich when she invented Autospellcheck.  It was a program that automatically corrected spelling errors without having to run a spell check.

  SerenaDante:  She became a nun and wrote a book called “Abstinence:  The Only Option.”

  Casmarie:  Casmarie and Jess were still on xanga 10 years later.  They were still both single and complaining about how no guys showed interest in either of them.  They were still getting 20 comments from guys that were all interested.

  TheBigShowatud:  He was nominated to the Supreme Court.  His confirmation hearing was a bitter fight after allegations of sexual harrassment by Ciaobella810 during their time on xanga.  TheBigShow was later confirmed and Ciaobella wrote a book about it.

  Avenuetothereal:  She was abducted by aliens controlled by the mafia and the government.  She managed to post once a year for the full 10 years and somehow managed to get 100 comments.

  Kestryl:  She still updated her pulse once a day leaving vague statements and then denying the pulses related to anyone.

  Milfncookies:  She had 12 children but still managed to look hot.

  Drakonskyr:  He settled down and married a nice Jewish woman.  He then taught high school making a difference in so many young lives.  He also wrote a book that no one really understood but it sold 5 million copies anyway.

  Lobornlytestthoughtpalace:  She finally came out of the closet and became an activist for gay and lesbian causes.

  Revelife:  Revelife was bought out by a porn company and turned into a Christian porn site for married couples.  It was renamed RevePorn.com.

  Eugenia:  She saved her money aside and then bought out xanga.  She decided to focus the site on making basic upgrades and features that people wanted and gave special focus to marketing and bringing new people to xanga.  To the surprise of everyone on the Xanga Team, this worked and xanga made a huge comeback. 

  Paul_Partisan:  Disappointed by the failure of the ish sites, he bought out Mancouch and Lovelyish and combined them into a site dedicated to “Makeup for coverup of women who are abused by Mancouch men.” 

  Kike and Andrew:  They went on to create an organization dedicated to fight Internet trolling and bullying. 

  Yosho:  He made millions with his new business but wasted all the money on hookers and strippers.

  Ohitwontbeforever:  She went on to become a dentist and changed the reputation of the U.K. as being a country full of people with crooked teeth.

  Ampersands_Anonymous:  She worked at the very last BlockBuster and operated it out of her own home.

  Roadlesstaken:  He went to 583 xanga meetups meeting a record 4934 xangans.

  Mangotini:  She was still hot 10 years later.

  Saintvi:  She discovered 8 million dollars while geocaching.  She returned the full 4 million.

  Thetheologianscafe:  He went on to run for the U.S. Senate and won.  He helped repeal the unpopular Obamacare and replaced it with the popular “Women show their boobs for free medical care program.”
                              
                                                                

  • 9:45 am
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