June 22, 2010
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Bisexual Women
I was talking to a lady friend recently and I have noticed that more women appear to have bisexual tendencies than men.
I am not sure why that is but you have all probably noticed that women are more likely to cuddle with each other or hold hands. You just don’t see that with guys. But I have also noticed that women are more likely to express bisexual tendencies like an attraction to the same sex.
I am not sure you can chalk that up to men being more repressed in their feelings. I think clearly more women are bisexual or at least bi-curious.
So lets poll the crowd.
Was there ever a time in your life when you were bi-curious?
Comments (131)
I’ve been bi-curious for the last six years. I have an attraction towards males and females but it feels so weird having to label my sexual orientation. I’ll just like whoever I like, whether it be a man or woman.
I’m curious. Not really attracted to women sexually but I’d kiss/touch one that was particularly attractive to me.
(Man) Yes
More than bi-curious. Totally bisexual.
yes, i had a dream once where i was a man and fucked a girl. after i woke up i thought- does this mean i’m a lesbian? hahaha i’ve never been with a girl, or even made out with one, but never say never.
Maybe some women feel more comfortable with being with their own sex. Like they want to know what would please them to know what they want from men. Who knows~ But I’m sure there are just as many bisexual men as bisexual women. They just probably aren’t as noticeable and assumed as ‘metro-sexual’ or so.
I definitely am curious about bi women…as long as they’re not too burly.
Yes. I actually am bisexual. I never really shut out the possibility of embracing love in whatever sex it came in.
Yes. Then I realized I was a lesbian. End of story
lol
yes
A better question is, where are all these bisexual women when you need them?
I think because it’s more accepted in our society that women are more likely to try it out.
You should look into Kinsey’s Heterosexual-Homosexual Rating Scale. He pretty much sums it up for both sexes.
http://www.kinseyinstitute.org/research/ak-hhscale.html
@HelloBreakdown - Same here!
Well, I am bisexual. =]
Bi curious, always have been.
I’m only attracted to women sexually though. I’d never engage in a relationship.
I’m married.
Its not all sexual but . . . yes and it been studied to death it is just true. There are more bi sexual woman than men more homosexual as well
no
Maybe the bisexual tendencies have more to do with getting male attention than actual exploration of one’s sexuality. Worked for Katy Perry.
If there was ever a good place for making you bi-curious, Xanga is it.
Yes.
Who wants to know?
Not curious, actually bisexual. =)
1 bisexual, checkin’ in.
of course…
For a couple of years, but rather innocently. The whole sex-with-another-lady thing didn’t really interest me.
Heck yes.
I’m bisexual.
@EarthsAzureLight - I’m surprised!
I believe it has to do with emotional repression on the male-half. A woman told me that she knew a man who would hold hands and be affectionate with his guy friends when he was little. One day, he was walking down the street with one of his male friends and this man pulled up next to them and yelled, “FAGS!”
That day, he went home and cried because he couldn’t express his affection for his guy friends anymore.
Also, female sexuality is generally more fluid when compared to males, according to some studies.
I think women are more likely to be bi curious because it’s more socially acceptable than for a man. Lesbians and bisexual women are seen as “hot”.
I was bi curious in jr high. Now I’m sure that I am bisexual.
I think you definitely CAN chalk that up to men repressing their feelings more, but don’t worry, you’re half right; they are not doing it by themselves. The fabric of our society, its messages, and towering, ubiquitous social institutions are instructing men and women differently. Men in America, in order to be “normal” men, must be macho, heterosexual, and stoic. Women, on the other hand, have more “permission” to be “soft,” and to experiment with their sexuality, because we live in a patriarchical society, and men enjoy watching women do things with each other. They are not necessarily threatened by female/female action either, because, the “normative” man does not take the “normative” woman seriously. She is an object, and a bi curious woman is not only an object to ogle, but a challenge. (PS I am not making any generalizations personally. This is simply how it was explained to me sociologically, and everything I have seen of the real world has supported this theory, one way or another.)
@FallenReign - Ditto.
I am definitely not afraid to say “wow, she is really attractive”, and if some opportunity rolled around I’d probably try it, but I don’t see myself settling down with a woman in any instance. I like the penis.
@ELBOWpasta - Yep. You finished my comment perfectly, haha.
Not I.
No
@FallenReign - Ditto. I dont really find myself attracted to females, but I don’t think I would mind trying stuff.
I was “bi-curious” for about 5-6 years….
Now I’m just a full-blown lesbian, and couldn’t be happier
(:
i cuddle and hold hands and wrap my arms around all of my friends. but i’ve not been bi curious. and i’m not bi.
Nope.
i disagree that women are genetically more bisexual or more bi-curious, we just live in a culture where female gender bending is considered more acceptable. For a woman to say she is bi, it is usually taken positively, or at least without much flack- if people assume anything unnecessarily, it’s usually that she’s “actually straight.” for a man to say he is bi, it is usually taken negatively, and they get a lot of flack about it- if people assume anything unnecessarily, it is that they are “actually gay and won’t admit it.”
Our culture is much more afraid of a guy acting or being gay than a woman. Most issues relating to defying the gender norms come down harder judgment-wise on men; a woman cross-dressing is refreshing, a man cross-dressing is outrageous and perverted. A woman doing a stereotypically “manly” thing like watching sports is just being well-rounded and interesting; a guy doing a stereotypically “womanly” task such as housecleaning or watching hgtv is “in the closet.” (not that any of these things really define what men and women are.)
People say they are tolerant towards others not following sexual normatives as far as being gay goes, and yet these same people will insist that everyone falls into the very narrow grounds of “you either like girls, or you like guys, no in-between, period.”
Personally I would say I have qualified as bi-curious.
@Tyrading_Tigger - haha! I wish I had seen your comment before I posted, you totally covered what I had to say.
Bisexual.
Yes, I definitely have bisexual feelings toward Scarlett Johansson.
hmmm well, my explanations:
1) It’s much more accepted generally for women to be bisexual, than men. Even many heterosexual men like watching two women being cuddly, while heterosexual women don’t seem to be that interested in watching two men make out…
2) As we all know, women are generally much hotter than men, so I guess even women themselves can’t resist their own charm
Bi-curious, yes.
I find women more attractive than guys plus they feel nicer.
I’ve never been bi-curious. but I have heard, on more than one occasion, that women are naturally bi-curious. and that doesn’t surprise me.
I’m straight, but I don’t mind hugging my guy friends – cuddling is okay sometimes
I’m not sure why I just clicked on one of your plugz… just to do it, I guess….
I am bisexual.
I’m going through that stage now!! ladies hollerr hahah
Yes.
i don’t think gender matters that much to me, so yeah, curious at the moment
i think everybody at a point in their lives feels bi-curious.
its only natural.
I believe studies have shown that women’s sexuality is a more fluid than mens. Also, women are not socially sanctioned from showing each other affection or being physically comfortable with each other the way men are. I’m not a bisexual but I do feel more comfortable and safe with women than I do with men.
Friendship is a golden chain that bunches two hearts together, if u never break that chain we shall be friends forever.
Most young ladies I have known who display bisexuality are merely doing it because they know guys think its hot. They want attention. The percentage of the population who actually are bisexual is probably far lower than people think it is, because of the way these women behave.
I don’t have a problem with people expressing homosexual tendencies, because I believe that many people are born that way. What I have a problem with is when girls (or even guys) make out with or sleep with the same sex only because they think it’s a good way to get members of the opposite sex interested in them. Quit lying to yourselves, and quit lying to others. If you’re straight act straight. If you’re gay, be gay. But don’t pretend.
I am bi.
Curious decades ago – never acted on it. No longer curious.
As for the women cuddling and holding hands, etc: I think it likely that men in America are much more likely to sexualize everything we either see or imagine than is justified. The comfort of contact from hand holding or cuddling is not necessarily a sexual comfort. American men seem to be particularly susceptible to fears of being labeled homosexual and are far to highly on guard. This heightened sensitivity creates a constant need to analyze what other people are doing and extrapolate what they are feeling. It’s a major hangup. Just go with the flow and don’t be concerned that someone might think you are gay. Why allow what other people might think about you to color your whole world?
I first realized that I was attracted to the same sex in the third grade.. I’m bisexual, not curious!
Women are attractive but would I ever want to do anything sexually with them? No.
I’d call myself bi-curious. I don’t really think of sex that often at all, be it with men or women. I don’t know if I’d be comfortable in a relationship with a woman because I never have been in one. (I’m too shy to ask people out…)
I am a bisexual woman. I actually get offended by the way women through bisexuality around. A good portion of the women, in my experience, that are open about being bi are just doing it for the attention of men. Yes, girls are closer to girls, everyone knows this. But that’s because females are more compassionate than men…in simple, we think with our hearts, not our heads. Girls tend to be a little more touchy feely, but it doesn’t mean that they are bi. Someone once told me, “When drunk, all women are bi”. That’s because when drunk, you are easily influenced. And knowing that guys like seeing 2 girls go at, means a totally straight woman is going to do something with another woman. I’m not trying to discredit anyone’s claim to their sexuality as I don’t know most of the people here. I’m just making an observation based of something that I have seen hundreds of times.
I’ve been bisexual ever since i was little.. i dont remember a time when i was just curious.
Woman + Woman = HOT. Which is, of course, right up the alley of a hypocrite like you.
If I was a woman, I’d be a lesbian.
Bisexual
i dk
For a short while….and then I labeled myself as bisexual…and now I know for a fact I prefer women. (On the Kinsey scale, I’d say I’m a 5)
I think women are all just more comfortable with each other whereas men freak out at the thought of looking gay. Society has just made it to where bisexual women and lesbians are considered “hot” and guys touching other guys is just “wrong”
Nope. I knew both before and after the 3some that I wasn’t interested in women sexually.
Yes there was.
I realized that I am straight, but I appreciate the beauty of a woman’s body. Plus, they are more fun to flirt with then guys (and I have a very flirty personality). It annoys me when sorority girls cover up their curves with over sized t-shirts. I am straight, but I can still appreciate.
@Unstoppable_Inner_Strength - If you were referring to Dan as the hypocrite, I would actually have to agree with you. Like a lot of heterosexual men they can’t stand the thought of a couple of gay men together but a couple of lesbians or bisexual females, oh yeah baby they’re all for that. Dan strikes me as the kind of man who would love to get it on with a couple of bisexual females but has “issues” with homosexual males.
Nope.
Nope. I have always loved men.
You know what, for me it’s a sexual attraction with women and it’s all about emotions with men. I’d rather be with a man but I’m pretty sure a girl could turn me on faster. I’ve never actually tried it though. But there was this one time at a club..
EVERY DAY OF MY LIFE – If I see a hot woman my mind instantly starts running. I’ve liplocked with a few handfuls of hotties and let me tell you – nothing beats a womans kiss. Nothing. Am I bisexual? I don’t consider myself such. I just enjoy human interaction.
mehhhh I don’t want to label it as bicurious. I feel like that has a whole other meaning than what I’m implying. But yeah, I have had bisexual encounters.
Well I am bisexual
And I’m a woman.
not curious..>.>
Bisexual, though I’d rather say pansexual.
I have always been bi-curious. I am attracted to women and have fantasized about sex with women before. If I find a woman who looks like Halle Berry, Scarlett Johansson, Salma Hayek, Kim Kardashian or Beyoncé… I am sooo acting on that curiosity.
there was indeed.
its a necessary part of developing a lesbian sexual identity
I think it’s more to do with the fact that it’s socially acceptable for women to be more fluid in their sexuality than men, not necessarily that men don’t have the tendencies; they’re just not as likely to voice that part of them.
@RaVnR - Nah! I still could be, but I had an experience in a gay club to lead me to believe I’m straight.
Agree. Women are wired differently. They establish closer relationships with people. Men are less bound by social and emotional baggage. It’s biological. What pisses me off is the man-hate. “OMG the double-standard! How come it’s HOT when its WOMEN and GROSS when its MEN!!”. You ladies need to seriously STFU with that crap. I’m sorry. I’m not interested in watching dudes sword-fight. Women bumping uglies IS hot. Go ahead. Tell me I’m a pig for having a preference. *finger* You angry man-hater feminist bitches piss me off. If all men are such f*cking asshole scum bags - guess what. You’re gay. Go find yourself a woman to get not-married to, rather than trying to emasculate one of us into your tiny man-quarium of 1932 disney perceptions about what a “man” is.
“I kissed a girl and I liked it” …uh, like when I was twelve. Perhaps it’s more of a trend than anything else.
@ginsu417 -
You’re a pig not because you have a preference, but because you are trying to force that preference on everyone else and being disrespectful to people who disagree with you.
And feminists don’t hate men, they hate misogynists. You seem to be having trouble discerning the difference, maybe you should pull your head out of your ass?
Heterosexuality and homosexuality are social constructs. Human sexuality exists along a continuum. We’re all at least a little bi, deal with it.
And fewer men experiment with it because it’s not socially acceptable for men at all. Furthermore, so called “lesbian” encounters that we see in popular culture and porn are fetishized beyond recognition and are performed to satisfy the male gaze. This means they reinforce the heteronormative paradigm, not detract from it.
If you think that some reason other than social norms and expectations are behind the lower tendency of men to experiment with their sexuality, you are mistaken. I suggest you read more Foucault and Kinsey.
@lunaticlama - Excuse me? Please identify where, and when I have forced my preference onto anyone. And when you’re done, look up “presumptuous”.
ginsu417 is an idiot. there’s no point arguing with him.
@ginsu417 - This section:
” OMG the double-standard! How come it’s HOT
when its WOMEN and GROSS when its MEN!!”. You ladies need to seriously
STFU with that crap. I’m sorry. I’m not interested in watching dudes
sword-fight. Women bumping uglies IS hot.”
You are telling them to stop pointing out a sexual double standard because you aren’t interested in other men.
Then you spew a bunch of tiresome “OMG feminists are so mean to us poor men! They think we’re all assholes! and are probably dykes!” crap, which is pretty presumptuous, by the way.
Straight here, but bisexual women are okay with me.
love man but curious about women
yes, bi-curious.
Let’s just say I can’t remember a time when I didn’t like both genders. Even in kindergarten I had a crush on a cute nerdy boy and a pretty Italian girl lol. But when I truly realized I also liked girls the same exact way I liked boys, I was about 10 yrs old.
I’m STILL bi-curious! And I’ve got a hot prospect. So exciting!
very bi-curious however, give me one HOT HOT girl, i might just turn lesbo.
cuddling and holding hands doesn’t necessarily have anything to do with bisexual tendencies. it could just as easily be a simple expression of friendly feelings for each other. but it’s easier for women to act on those tendencies because, in the eyes of the majority, two chicks making out is hot, but two guys making out is gross.
and i’ve never swung over to the other side of the fence.
I am bisexual.
Nope, sorry. I hate women and wouldn’t want one.
yeah, I am… I don’t really know lol, I like boys, but my mind is open to the possibility that my soul mate may be a girl, even though I am not physically attracted to girls
Totally bisexual. (That’s what my blog is all about, actually.)
However, I would also like to say that I know plenty of women who are not bi-curious or bisexual who also hold hands and cuddle with the same gender. They do it with men, too. It’s their way of showing affection and has nothing to do with their orientation. Also remember that some women will claim bisexual/bicurious to get male attention.
I like both men and women, but I don’t need a label
bisexual, yes.
women are fucking gorgeous.
Definitely bisexual, not bicurious.
In my past I have had enough sexual incounters with women that most people would call me bi-sexual. However, I have never felt romantic feelings for a woman. They have all been purely on a physical level. This is why I have always considered myself semi-straight. I am not curious, I have figured that part out several times. I know that I enjoy physical stimulation with a guy and a girl pretty equally, but when it comes to wanting something deeper and with more meaning than a one night stand, I can only get that from a man. I am currently in a committed relationship with a man and while I am 100% happy and satisfied, I find myself turning my head to check out a woman than I do a man. This is probably because no matter how amazingly wonderful my boyfriend is… there are certain sexual stimulations he cannot provide because he is not a woman (Thank God). He is fully aware of my attraction to females and once he got over the shock, he enjoys checking girls out with me. We both know neither of us will ever act on these attractions, but we enjoy talking about them with each other.
Putting aside the girls that pounce on other girls for attention (who I can’t stand but I have used for my own personal satisfaction), I think it is far more acceptable for women to act on their physical attraction towards the same sex than it is for men. I have gotten several guys to in one way or another admit to wanting or wondering about hooking up with another guy… but they felt it was too taboo. Most guys that I know that have tried it felt so “gay” they never wanted to do it again… and they sure as heck didn’t want anyone to know about it. Girls are practically cheered on to engage in their curiosity, some even pressured into it. On the other hand… when guys “act” lovey-dovey to each other it is always meant for comedic relief.
I know of quite a few guys that act like they are physically attracted to their male friends… and even go so far and grabbing at them, hugging on them, sitting on their laps, ect. However, they all treat it as soley to be funny or to annoy their friends, not because they have a desire to truly act on them. Now if they really do have this deep down desire, it is hard to say.
This is why I think straightish girls hook up with girls than straightish guys hook up with guys…. If guys were just as encouraged as girls were, I think we’d see more of it.
@lunaticlama - I could just hug you.
I don’t determine my lover/partner based on their sex. I’m open to being with whomever I am attracted to, and with whoever I have feelings for. I’ve been with women, I’ve been with men.
Yes but fortunetly my Christian values and heterosexulaity won out.
i think that has a lot to do with the fact that men experimenting is so much less accepted than girls experimenting, but to answer your question: yes i have
If the right woman came along, I would be all over it. I never have in the past 50 years but I’m open to it.
I think men are the same way but, most would never admit to it.
Yup.
I can tell you that it’s more a case of what’s socially acceptable than who’s more bi-curious than whom. Since guys think bi women are sexy and find girl-on-girl sex a turn-on, then bi is fine when it applies to women. From my personal experience I know that many young guys are bi-curious but know how harsh society is towards men who admit that.
All that said, yes, there have been many points in my life when I have been attracted to women.
Nope.
I’m bicurious
Sure, I’d lick it.
I think we are naturally attracted to each other and not necessarily in a sexual way. I think it’s easy to turn that attraction into something sexual if one was so inclined.
Because it’s more socially acceptable? (Guys like it?) I just know that my gay friends who were male were in complete denial before they came out….I don’t know.
I thought I just found them sexually attractive but then I met a girl who I wanted romantically. It sucked.
I think most women are bisexual to some extent.
girls are naturally affectionate, and there is such a thing as platonic affection.
I am totally straight and not “curious”.
i had a lesbian dream once when i was in gr. 8. never ever since then have i thought about a woman. so i have never been bicurious or bisexual. sometimes i dance with my girlfriends but nothing more than sexy dancing cuz it’s thrilling.
Of course, I think most girls have experimented in their life time, or AT LEAST wanted to.
I have been bisexual since my very first memories.
I have noticed that women have more bisexual tendencies.
I have met women who are fully disgusted with anything woman on woman.
I don’t think men are just repressing their sexuality.
I would like to know why it seems that more women are bi curious/sexual as well.
After reading a few more comments.. I have to say that all my attraction towards the same sex are purely physical.
Romans 1
God’s Wrath Against Mankind
18The wrath of God is being revealed from heaven against all the godlessness and wickedness of men who suppress the truth by their wickedness, 19since what may be known about God is plain to them, because God has made it plain to them. 20For since the creation of the world God’s invisible qualities—his eternal power and divine nature—have been clearly seen, being understood from what has been made, so that men are without excuse.
21For although they knew God, they neither glorified him as God nor gave thanks to him, but their thinking became futile and their foolish hearts were darkened. 22Although they claimed to be wise, they became fools 23and exchanged the glory of the immortal God for images made to look like mortal man and birds and animals and reptiles.
24Therefore God gave them over in the sinful desires of their hearts to sexual impurity for the degrading of their bodies with one another. 25They exchanged the truth of God for a lie, and worshiped and served created things rather than the Creator—who is forever praised. Amen.
26Because of this, God gave them over to shameful lusts. Even their women exchanged natural relations for unnatural ones. 27In the same way the men also abandoned natural relations with women and were inflamed with lust for one another. Men committed indecent acts with other men, and received in themselves the due penalty for their perversion.
28Furthermore, since they did not think it worthwhile to retain the knowledge of God, he gave them over to a depraved mind, to do what ought not to be done. 29They have become filled with every kind of wickedness, evil, greed and depravity. They are full of envy, murder, strife, deceit and malice. They are gossips, 30slanderers, God-haters, insolent, arrogant and boastful; they invent ways of doing evil; they disobey their parents; 31they are senseless, faithless, heartless, ruthless. 32Although they know God’s righteous decree that those who do such things deserve death, they not only continue to do these very things but also approve of those who practice them.
i’m straight… in a manner of speaking. i’m not a normal guy tho… im transgender so i’ve got the body of a girl but in my head i’m a guy. and i like women, not men.
-Shadow
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