August 25, 2011
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Touching Yourself?
The owners of a website are coming under fire for writing “Children are ‘sexual beings’ who shouldn’t be discouraged from touching themselves unless it gets out of hand.” (If we were mature adults we would not comment on the “out of hand” remark). Here is the link: Link
Should children be discouraged from touching themselves?
Comments (64)
Stupid. :I
I wish my parents had. I may have actually had some free time in my childhood.
define children. according to the law 17 year olds are children. if they mean 10 year olds, well if the kid discovers that and enjoys it I guess it’s no one’s business but I wouldn’t want to suggest it to them before they even got the idea themselves, but if they mean teenagers i think it’s a perfectly legitimate parenting strategy to suggest masturbating as a way to avoid having sex too soon.
No.
No, it helps with motor skills
Helping raise a lot of kids, a LOT of kids start “touching” themselves at very young ages. Why? Because it feels good. It’s not a sexual thing either, it’s just a child exploring their body. The same way an infant and toddler find their body parts (fingers, hands, feet) and start using them (grabbing, waving, walking). I haven’t gone to the site myself but if I were to read that I’d think the author was trying to say we shouldn’t discourage or reprimand children from touching themselves. Just let them know that it’s something to do at home, not out in public, and that it’s perfectly fine.
My neighbor definitely should. Right now AS WE SPEAK my neighbor is doing coke, watching porn, sniffing rush and jerking off. SILLY BOYS!
He wanted me to 69 him but for some STUPID reason I decided to argue with Curtis on xanga instead. Must be my blonde hair I guess.
It’s a natural education of self: Kids explore and learn about their own bodies, they discover “touching themselves”, “LIKE THAT”, and when that happens they have discovered something that has felt good. if we are talking about young kids, they don’t identify that feeling with sex because chances are they don’t know what sex is, just that it felt good. I’m speaking from my own self-exploration experiences. I believe that I read that somewhere too.
Let them explore, there’s no harm in it.
Children are innocent, asexual beings, and anybody who says anything else is a pedo.
This is hot.
I think masturbation is a healthy way for a person to explore themselves. It’s about as natural as it gets. I mean, it can become a problem if excessive (just ask my cousin – used to rub one out at least six times a day – ended up with a penile rash from excessive rubbing, ha) but if done properly it really shouldn’t be a problem to anyone other than the one using their own hand. And I’m sure they’ll tell you they don’t mind.
oh whoa ~ I don’t love, anybody else, when I think about you I touch myself.
No. Why? Why should they, I mean? It is so dang ANNOYING the way – starting at birth – some people want everyone to think of their own bodies as something so dirty you can’t even say what it is. My oldest daughter actually got kicked out of a day care for using the word “vagina” because I taught her that was what that body part is called!
OMG every boy I know has his hands down his pants half the time. My son sort of played with his little penis while watching cartoons. I just said that was something we do in private, or I ignored it. The boys at work I say, dude get your hand out of your pants your at school, come on now. Girls do it too they just seem more discreet.
@momofjenmatt - I agree with myself lol
yes we should discourage them. It can lead to arthritis. I’m proof.
@godfatherofgreenbay - In my case it lead to rigor mortus.
My penis is more interesting than any girl it has crawled in.
As long as they’re not doing it in public I don’t see what the bfd is. Though I knew a kid in college who walked around with his hand perpetually down his pants anyway… smh…
I never touched my private areas when I was a kid beyond washing them. No one had to tell me not to do it. I didn’t even know what sex really was until I was 13 or 14.
I lived in a rural area.
*snicker snicker snicker* out of hand…
Children should be handcuffed until the age of 18.
I remember dry humping objects but not actually using my hand. nobody had to tell me not to do it in public though. I knew that I was doing something bad and didn’t want anybody to find out
The only reason they should be discouraged is if they are doing it in in public. Otherwise you let them know it’s only something done when you are by yourself in your room
Depends on how young we are talking about. Not as in that one age group should prohibited and one shouldn’t, but it changes the circumstances.
Well I’ve played with myself from the age 8. Obviously at such a young age, you don’t really know what to do with it, err where it goes. Truth is, with all the new technology and parents not controlling what they view through this technology, e.g. smartphones, they may be getting them exposed to something that they don’t understand or they understand it all wrong. I don’t think they should encourage or discourage as we are hedonistic by nature and they’ll do it anyways because it feels good. Use the opportunity to at least teach them right from wrong, before they go watch something like Borat and get the idea that they can just force it onto women, or whatever. My girlfriend she told me she started touching herself at 4 years of age. She did not know what it was, she would rub, dry hump, anything with her clitoris, as it felt good. She did not know why, she did not know how, she just knew that rub=nice. Her grandmother would get angry at her, so she would do it in the bathroom. If they started doing it, you shouldn’t shame them for it, but educate them.
not in a serious manner for the very young, because it is just a discovery thing for them. I mean that it is important not to start an awareness too soon that it is frowned upon by grownups and yet it is nice to do. A child’s innocence should be protected while they discover things for themselves, including not doing certain things in public, such as touching yourself, spitting, picking your nose. If touching the genitals is included in that same sort of rebuke level as the last two, I think the child has a good chance of developing into a healthy adult being.
@NikBv - children are NOT “asexual”
children discover crushes and their body parts during childhood, how could they possibly be “asexual.” this is just a silly thing to say, and i’m DEFINITELY not a pedo.
Children shouldn’t be discouraged; they should definitely be taught in the ways of moderation. That would help with later things, like alcohol, electronics, or spending money in any way.
Also, I really wish I hadn’t gone to a Baptist school. No sex ed class, no hot female teachers. At least it was only through junior high….
iof it gets sex off their minds for a bit, but i would discourage even that until youre like…16 at least..
I’ve got 2 kids…and 8 year old daughter and a 13 year old son. The rules for touching themselves were defined at a very young age.
1) No touching that way in public. And in public includes the living room or any other common areas of the house. Keep it in the bathroom or your bedroom with the door closed.
2) There isn’t really a rule 2. I just think it makes me look like a better mother if I have more then one rule
No. If theyre sexually mature, then its much better for them to touch themselves than go off and have sex. I mean, nowadays, kids are becoming sexually mature (at least girls…) around the ages of nine, ten, eleven, etc.
Shouldn’t that be up to the family themselves? I’m sure nobody cares if their neighbors’ 9 year old son masturbates or not.
I don’t think they should be discouraged, they need to be talked about privacy but touching yourself is the only way to get to know you and a very useful way to discover your own body and sexual feelings.
I haven’t put much thought into this, but surely, if children are not doing this in public and not excessively, it shouldn’t a problem, right? Best thing for parents to do is to teach their children when and where this behavior is acceptable and to make sure it doesn’t take up so much time that it interferes with school/homework or family activities (chores, mealtime, quality time).
As my mom said when we were growing up in relation to my brother constantly “checking” to make sure he was there… “It’s his. He can play with it if he wants to.”
@mtngirlsouth - Kicked out for saying vagina? What was she supposed to say? That’s just crazy to me.. I mean, it’s not like she was going around using other less-appropriate terms..
Way to diffuse the best joke in this post, Dan.
A Poem:
I touch myselfI think its grandI go to the moviesAnd hold my…….
Pee Wee, is that you in front of me?
Let it go. Next thing you know I will not be able to buy my Happy Meal with secret sauce on it.
@Saridactyl - That’s what I thought too.
Has anyone seen the pedobear?
@RealistFantasies - They were being sarcastic, moron
As long as they know that it’s only socially acceptable in private I think it’s just natural
Clearly, I am not a mature adult.
no.
No. It’s part of healthy human sexuality. If we don’t know how our bodies work, it often leads to all sorts of sexual dysfunction later in life, not to mention that overstepping certain privacy and control boundaries. Also, the more you try to keep them from doing it, the more they’ll do it.
I don’t think it’s a sexual thing for children, but the shame that is cast on touching yourself in childhood can really stick with you and stunt your sex life later. My mother told me not to touch myself, and it took me a long time to get over the feelings of shame and disgust about it. It’s a natural, healthy, good thing, we shouldn’t ruin it.
Isn’t this type of trash illegal to have in public papers and stuff-sexual shit and kids.
I started masturbating when I was 7 years old. I was aware of what I was doing, and I knew not to do it in public. There’s nothing wrong with masturbation, so I don’t see why it should be forbidden for children if they aren’t doing it in public.
i cant think of anything more ridiculous than telling someone they cannot touch their own body. i think its ok to explain that we live in a society where people will ostracize you if you walk around masturbating, because thats the truth. but shit. do what you want with your own hand and vag. they’re friends, after all.
I think so.
I understand that after a certain age they need their own privacy and at this point, who KNOWS what they are doing behind closed doors…
But when children are YOUNG I don’t think it should be ENCOURAGED either…
I think there IS such a thing as oversexed (This I’ve even heard from counselors and psychologists about young people) and “too young” to understand certain things.
If I saw that my child was touching him/herself… (as I’ve seen kids do) I wouldn’t encourage it, but I wouldn’t sit down and have a “sex talk” with them about it either.
I remember going to a friends house and witnessing her little sister touching herself outside of a bed or bathroom. NO WAY would that be going on in my home. If they are behind closed doors and I don’t know about it, then whatever.
But never in my presence, and not until I felt they were ready would I have an actual “discussion” about it.
I’m not even going to touch this
Though I knew a boy in college who walked around with his hand perpetually down his pants anyway..
it depends how old. yet again, its not an appropriate activity for your children, or any children to be indulging in. if they are at the older age where they discover masturbation then fine. but you don’t have to encourage it, or even know anything about it.
oh brother…people have too much time on their hands.
It’s natural to be curious when you’re small. Children learn about masturbation fairly early, even if they can’t grasp what it is. So long as they know that’s something people do in private, I don’t think it’s a big deal.
@ShimmerBodyCream - do NOT call me a moron because i misunderstood sarcasm over the internet. it’s not as though no one holds views such as those.
@RealistFantasies - That’s the point, people do hold views such as those, that’s why it was funny. You’re too fucking stupid to understand.
no. just be discreet. dont hurt yourself while doing it. and plz WASH YOUR HANDS
@ShimmerBodyCream - i’m not stupid, and i’ve already told you NOT to call me it. and that’s why it’s NOT funny, because views like that ARE held and ARE detrimental to society.
@RealistFantasies - I’m sorry, stupid fucking moron.
@ShimmerBodyCream - try not being a cunt? <3
I believe young children should be allowed to explore themselves, but I disagree with parents who encourage it, let them continue as they get older, and worse yet, teach them things that they have no reason to know until they’re older. Whatever happened to preserving a child’s innocence? Children are not ‘s*xual beings’, and anyone who would dare say otherwise, I would seriously wonder if they were a pedo. Until a child is 12 or older (many are not mature enough at even that age), parents should not try to teach all these words and other things that children have no business knowing about. When I was a child, it was called someone’s private/privates, not the technical terms used by (teens and) adults. There was a woman I once knew that, to me, serves as a good example of what NOT to teach your children. She taught her 5 year old son to play with. himself at anytime/anyplace he felt like it. She started dating my uncle when the child in question was ten years old (the first time I met them). Well, needless to say, the boy and his mother showed up at our (very crowded) cookout/birthday party for my cousin, and this kid walks right up in the middle of everybody, drops his shorts/underpants, and starts masturbating rather noisely. My uncle, who was terribly embarrassed (cause it was the son of his gf) scolded him for it, but the boy’s mother screamed at my uncle to leave him alone. She said he did it to relax and relieve stress. At home, she often gave him porn to look at, and claimed it was used to ‘educate’ him. She was a very, very sick woman… and at only ten years old, he’s already showing early signs of aggression and s*xual desire towards females. He was even suspended from school for a day, and his mom told to find him a psychologist. Why? He’d been groping his female classmate’s bottoms and boobs. TEN YEARS OLD!! My God. What have people done to the innocence of children…..smh
I started about when I was about 14. Never stopped!