February 25, 2006
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Abortion Part 4
One of the ideas mentioned in the last few post about abortion is that men should not have a say in the issue of abortion because they are never put into that situation.
Should men be able to help decide on the issue of abortion?
Comments (213)
FIRST!
and no!
unless their the woman daddy and the girl is realy young!
i think that the man can give his opinion, but i think the women ultimately needs to make the decision…
more often that not, the woman will be taking care of the child if she chooses to keep it…
#1 YEAH!
Men should be allowed to help, because we have intelligence as well…
Even though we have not experienced childbirth, we can still make rational decisions
okay, maybe not first, but close…
maybe
No.
NOONE SHOULD BE ABLE TO CHOOSE.
Yes. Men are necessary for the creation process, too, and often are more interested in the child than might the woman be. The female ought to have final say, but the father deserves a choice.
If he’s the father, he has a right to his opinion, but I don’t know that men should be making the laws about abortion, or that government should be involved at all other than to monitor it as it does all health care to keep it safe.
as far as possibly helping the woman they impregnated decide, yes they should be asked
Abortion should not be allowed, period.
Nicholas
men should at least be able to voice an opinion. they’re half the baby.
however, no one should make laws about it, other than making sure its done safely. it shouldnt be prohibited, shouldnt be promoted. it should be just another health option.
If a man really wants to keep the child, he should definitely have a say in it. I’m sure there are court cases over the matter. Abortion should only be done if it’s mutual or in extreme cases like rape.
we should clarify, many people are treating this as an individual case… is this about the court decisions, in single occurencess?
I think the father of a child should have a say in that child’s life, but I also think the child should have a say in its life, even if it hasn’t been born yet!
A point to consider: If a woman is pregnant, she will give birth to a baby. The question then is whether the baby will be dead or alive.
Only if we’re the ones who are buying the coathanger and the lasagna.
I’m very pro-abortion, not because of any of the ethics involved or murdering babies or Jesus said stuff, but I’m pro-abortion because it leads to less people.
We could do with less people around.
last time I checked it takes 2 to tango!
My Thoughts:
Over all, the woman SHOULD have the final say. But the father of the child should be able to have an influence. A large influence. It’s his kid too.
Except in the case of rape and what-not.
This is a very hard question for me to answer. I just don’t know. I think our general thoughts on abortion can’t help but sway the way that we answer this question…..abortion isn’t something that i condone, so for me I think the man should have a say. However, I do think that abortion is a personal choice for a woman…..and I guess a woman has a right to make choices for her own body that a man shouldn’t. …but I can’t get away from the notion that it is his baby, too….. uggh! this one is to hard for me, Dan!
I sent you an email.
Not only should men have a say, but they should be forced to be brought in, if at all possible, for consideration. Not to be crude, but once you whip it out and stick it in, you’ve put your name into the plastic baggie of responsibility. There is no absolute, fool-proof method of contraception other than absolutely abstaining from coital sex (that is, phallic/vagnal intercourse); knowing this, when a person engages in a sexual behavior that could possibly lead to the impregnantion of the female involved, the man is just as responsible as said female for what may happen. That 1-5% chance that your contraception may fail is something you will have to be responsible for.
As said many times before, it takes two to tango. Anyone involved in the creation of a child should ultimately have a say in it. A child needs chromosomes from both parents to be born; that means that there is a 50/50 responsibility split, and a 50/50 right to opinion split as well.
Stephen
Yes and no. If they are married, he should have a say because there could be finance issues or his wife could have been raped. If they are not together, probably not. It depends on the situation.
Every human being that understands the sanctity of life should shout from the rooftops about abortion. The issue has been dragged into the idea that it is a woman’s body a woman’s choice. This is a lie it is the life of the baby that is the question. 85,000 in the state of Florida alone last year. If the issue is the woman’s body woman’s choice than perhaps the issue that should be discussed is state mandated sterilazation not abortion.
It takes 2 to make a baby, it should take 2 to decide about abortion.
(My prayer is that the decision is always NOT to have the abortion)
yes…?
No abortion, period.
yes…since we caused the baby to be there in the first place
I’ve noticed that everybody that is for abortion has already been born. ~Ronald Reagan, quoted in New York Times, 22 September 1980
I love how people get so uppity about this. Legalize it or not, abortion will continue, even if someone has to commit some fucked-up form of fetus hari-kari to do it. There are just times when people cannot abide having a child, and will get rid of it, by any means necessary.
Quoting scripture and clever little lines about it, isn’t going to change a god damn thing.
No.
Yes- baby boys are being murdered too- men have an obligation to society to stick up for the unborn
yes
I’m completely against abortion, but if you love a man and trust him then they should help with the decision
SketchesbyBose:
I’ve already been born, and I am for the right to an abortion, that much can be said.
If the creation of my life would have in any way endangered, or been linked to the iminent death of my mother, I would have wished rather to be aborted before I could cause the damage than to be born, and ultimately kill the being which would have hopefully created me out of love. To me, a life already in existance is much more important than something that is still in a “would-be” stage.
It may seem easy to say this, because I am already alive, but it is not. I value my own life, and life itself, very highly. However, I would value the life of my mother much more than my own, if it came down to it. I would not want her to have aborted me simply because it was the most convenient thing for her to do, but if it was a necessity to ensure her own physical well-being, then I would have it done, plain and simple.
It would be one of the most emotional gestures in the world for her to give her own life up for mine, if that would have happened, but I would rather have her safe, knowing what life was, rather than myself, not knowing, perhaps, what this same life was. Being that I have a strong spiritual root in the idea of reincarnation — through, through my own devices, a personal definition — it would serve a much more positive purpose to allow the continuance of something already in play. This is an exhibition of how those beliefs can differ.
Stephen
There shouldnt be a decision…no one should consider murder
Jade Orchard raises a cute point, mayb if there’s some cash problems, you should just kill the baby…awwww, the world needs more compassionate people like that.
and wut Drakonskyr said: “Quoting scripture and clever little lines about it, isn’t going to change a god damn thing.”
yea well im not stoppin, if i or any other “scripture quoter” can prevent ONE abortion with our clever little lines, then i say rock on. saving a life is worth it to me.
I was going to have a real opinion, but last time I did that a whole bunch of people came to my site and yelled at me, so instead I’ll just try and say something funny like… Monkeys throw poo.
This question is a bit ambiguous. Are you asking if a man should have a say whether a baby should be aborted, or are you asking if men should have a say whether abortion is illegal?
As far as the legality of abortion, yes, men should have a say. It’s a human rights issue. But in Western society where abortion rights advocates have had success in framing the issue as necessary for women’s rights, almost a lynchpin for women achieving equality with men (nothing of the sort, but that can be for another topic), it is good for women to be out there speaking out against abortion, making the human rights arguments, the “what does it say about ourselves as a society” arguments, the feminist argument that abortion is a symptom of women’s inequality and not the cure.
As far as the decision to abort in a society where abortion is legal, it depends on the situation. A husband should have a say–not the final say, but a say. In most “one night stand” cases, the man probably should not have a say. In the case of a pregnant minor, the parents (father and mother) should have final say in most cases, though there would of course be exceptions: abusive family or incest. In any case, I’d hope the choice would be to bring the baby into this world.
do men have a say in when the pregnancy started?
I believe abortion is murder. I do not believe a father should ever force a mother to kill her children. But I do believe he ought to be notified and should have a say if that mother wants to murder his child(ren).
they can have an opinion, but i think the ultimate choice should be made by women.
yeah, because if he’s the father, he should have a say.
if he is the father.. of course he has a say to it..
As a small point of clarity, my opinion on males having a say in abortion is the following:
Yes, a male should be able to put in an opinion; how that opinion is utilized would do well to go as follows -
In the case of the male wanting the female to abort the fetus, the decision should require a “yes” on both the male’s, and female’s part. That is to say, it should not fall to one or the other, if both make a decision. While the male helped create the child it does, essentially, act as a parasite within the woman’s body for the 9 months/38-42 week gestation period, not the man’s, and as such the woman is affected much more.
In the case that a male wants a female NOT to abort the fetus, and the female wants to abort the fetus, if there is no immediate endangerment to the female’s life, I think that the male saying he would like the life-in-progress to be allowed to become a life, so long as he can assuredly take care of the child, if the female does not, should be enough to preserve the sanctity of the possible existance.
Just two scenarios in what I am sure are many.
Stephen
No, no and again NO!
They can have a say, but not final say.
If it if their kid, of course!!!!
Men should be able to offer their opinion, but it’s the woman’s choice.
they should but it shouldnt be as much as the women does
I mean, he should have some say, but I don’t think he should be able to force her to have one. I don’t think she should be able to have one without his consent either though. I don’t know, it’s hard to say, I admit that I’m completely biased because I don’t believe in abortion at all, so I can’t really be objective…
Of course! Why should we overlook the opinions of 50% of the population? Men are never put in the situation of pregnancy, but they are surely responsible for putting women into it! If men should not be allowed to have a say in the abortion question, they might as well be relieved of all responsibilities as fathers. Judge yourselves, but I don’t think anyone would profit from that.
yes, but if it was a rape case then no
C’mon Dan….
NO, NO, & HELL NO!
Candy Xo
I am just not sure you cant give him a say in what goes on. If she wants a baby and he doesnt, he will have to pay child support. If he wants it and she doesnt, she chooses to abort. I see that being a major issue.
Of course they should. It’s their baby too.
why shouldn’t men have an opinion when it comes to their bodies? we have to listen to their silly opinions all the time. it’s only fair.
so when dose the question of “wheres the babies choice 2 live?” enter the scene?? i mean if 2 ppl are gonna have sex and a child is concieved…and that means life… so many ppl these days are nothing but pussies…..i mean if they cant step up to their actions, sumone dies..and that is the baby…..now how fair is that?? wat if ur mom aborted u?? how would u like it?? so all that said..the father should deffinitly have a say so in the ending of his childs life…or a sacrifce to “fix the problem” he has helped create…..
The man should have a say, I suppose, but definitely not the final say, and only in individual cases, not in making the actual laws. It should always be the woman’s final say.
Umm. I don’t know. But I think that if it were MEN that had the babies, abortion clinics would be as common as those quick oil change businesses – and there would be no question – abortion would be legal. I do NOT think that’s the way it SHOULD be – but the way it WOULD be – if men had the babies! Oh! And BILLIONS of dollars would be spent trying to figure out how to make it so it was the women that had the babies, and then abortion could be made illegal!
Oh, my! There’s one of those BROAD brush generalizations I dislike so much!
Go back to my first answer: I don’t know!
all u ppls for abortion make me aboslutly SICK!! wat if sumone just decided that u were a problem and just killed u b.c theyd rather do that than face sumthing else..but that would be murder…no differnt than abortion..seriously…. check it out at xanga.com/abortion_is_genocide bet ull find out sumthin u didnt kno…b.c it my pro life site…
Yeah, if it is his kid, or he is the father of a minor who is considering getting an abortion.
It also amazes me the number of people who are against the death penalty but for abortion. We don’t want to rid our society it’s “BTK” killers, but if good ole John and Sally ‘accidentally’ get pregnant from playing the “just the head” game, we justify killing an innocent life.
So, murderers live, and innocent unborns die. It is cruel to kill a killer because who are we to play God, but convienent to kill an innocent life.
People in this country are so messed up.
It’s time to start taking responsibilty for your actions people. The way I see it, if you feel you’re mature enough to have sex, then you should be mature enough to deal with the consequences.
i agree with surfshepard
the man should have a say, but the woman gets the final word- it is her body, after all.
Anatomic_Conversion:
You raised a straw argument. I have no problem with “abortion” if the mother’s life is endangered. Unfortunately, seventy-seven percent of all abortions are done for no other reason than that the mother didn’t want to have her child. Women should have no more of a say concerning whether their babies can die than men, just because they are able to have the child and the man isn’t. Who then has the greater sin?
I thought I should expand on my reply. Abortion should never be considered an option unless of rape, period. But that wasn’t the question. I cannot understand why exactly a man’s opinion shouldn’t be taken into consideration. It’s actually quite sickening to me, that a woman who, for all intents and purposes got pregnant because she was being a damn fool and not being careful, would go behind the father of the baby’s back and have it murdered without asking him what he thought. And actually, just because men cannot get pregnant, they can actually carry and have the baby. Look it up. So, the whole it’s my body argument, is a bit silly. Now, I understand that perhaps the baby would be born out of wedlock and the father won’t claim the baby as his and so, for financial reasons, the mother can’t afford to have a baby. Give the baby up for adoption. I would give anything to be able to have my own child..
ZionAngel:
Not every abortion is a convenience abortion; if you go look up statistics for many abortion claims, there is a larger percentage that are done as a result of immediate danger to the life of the mother. In some cases it just isn’t feasible to allow a fetus to develope past the 24-week period, without causing damage to the mother. Is the life of the unborn more important than the life of the mother?
As I already stated, if my own mother were in danger of dying as a result of my birth, and it was impossible to remove me prior to the full gestation/birth, then I would much rather be aborted. As I see it now, her own life is much more important than my own.
Stephen
NOPE!! THEY DON’T HAVE TO GO THROUGH IT!
No, they shouldn’t. If it’s the woman’s bf of husband, they can give opinions, but no, not decide. Then again, I don’t think women have the right to decide either…only in the case of rape is it out of their control, and there is always adoption in that extreme case. People are so irresponsible. They choose to have sex and spread themselves around and if they get pregnant they just kill it because it would inconvinance them. It’s ridiculous. I know a few people who were put up for adoption rather than aborted and they are the most grateful people that their moms had the decency to do the right thing and not take the easy way out. Abortion needs to be illegal. Unless the mother’s life is in danger and the doctor thinks it needs to be done, there is no excuse. Just stop whoring it up and maybe you won’t find yourself in the position. The whole purpose of sex is to make babies…so if you aren’t ready for one, then you probably shouldn’t be having it. You can’t engage in reckless behavior and then be pissed off when it results in children. Get over yourselves.
~Sarah~
If it weren’t for men, women wouldn’t get pregnant. I think it’s selfish for the woman to assume she is the only one affected by an unexpected pregnancy. Yes, the baby is conceived in her body, but it is only with the man’s sperm that this is achieved. If a woman can decide if she wants to kill an innocent baby, the man should be able to as well.
I’m pro-life anyway, so I think abortion should be made illegal. The U.S. is the only nation with a positive population growth rate because of high abortion and infanticide rates in other countries.
SketchesByBoze:
I have stated previously that I do not support convenience abortions; in fact, the only type of abortions I do support are those in which the mother is in immediate danger as a result of allowing the child to develope to the point at which it can be removed, or birthed. I would not support a law saying that abortion was ok so long as the mother wanted it, and for no other reason; I would support a law that restricted abortion, but which included an amendment that allowed for termination of an embryo or fetus, in early or late term(s), for mothers in that physical danger.
If 77% of abortions are supposedly for convenience, then 33% are not, yes? I believe that we should restrict that 77%, and allow the 33% for which there may be legitimate reasoning beyond simply not wanting, or having the time to take care of the child. I can’t stress enough that, despite our medical advancements, there is still a chance of maternal mortality in the United States, United Kingdom, and other such countries. If up to 9.9 in every 100,000 births end in maternal mortality, that is simply too much for me, and enough to warrant a law making abortions possible for people who may fall under that category.
Legally, I don’t think that women should have more of a say in aborting their feti than the men involved would. The child is a creation that has been spawned from the connection of materials from both parties; despite the fact that gestation takes place within the female’s body, if there is no physical threat to the woman and the male wishes for her to have the child, so that he might raise it — in a situation where the child was conceived as a result of a consensual engagement — I believe that the man’s wish should be granted.
I don’t view the stemming of the possibility of life as the killing of a life; there are not one in the same, for me. This idea is a person one which takes into account my idea of when life begins, my realization that we do not have a unified agreement upon that fact, my spirituality and ideas of life and death, etc.
Stephen
Anatomic_Conversion - Where are you getting your statistics? All the statistics that I’ve seen have the reason why a woman has an abortion due to risk of maternal health at 2%. Abortions because of rape is even lower.
X_tragicBeauty_X:
If you look earlier in this forest of comments you will see a slightly lengthy one on my part with a handful of quotes, and citations for those quotes. It’s from those sites, among many, that I am currently taking my statistics. In my previous post, where I quoted “77%” and “33%” I was using the statistics of the person I was responding to in order to propose a theoretical logic based upon the numbers — whether they’re true or not I don’t know, so if you’d like to then you’ll have to ask the person from whom I recieved them: “SketchesByBoze”
Some statistics are from older reports accessible in local college libraries; most of them only go up to roughly 1996, as a few that you’ll find online. Some are government statistics — one taken from .gov, as you can see in that earlier comment I pointed you to.
Where are you getting your statistics, and how recent are they? Also, for what country are they?
. Mine are for the US, dating only as recently as around 2002-04; I’ve been unable to find any for 2006, so I can neither confirm or deny current ratings. If you could shuffle some my way, I’d appreciate it.
Stephen
depends…although i know i wouldn’t want rapists to have a say. once you violate someone in that way, then no, you should lose your right have any kind of say in what happens to the baby. well, i think their opinions should be taken into consideration, but the woman’s should ultimately be the deciding voice. she’s the one who has to carry it.
It takes two……
This is another example of the feminazi attack on fatherhood.
yes because they have a life to live and they value life just as much as a woman would. just because they dont participate in it, they can either before against it because it does take away the life of someone who has not even had a chance to live their life yet, or they can vote for the female to be able to choose because it is partially their fault that the girl got pregnant.
so yes. they should get to help make that decision.
I didn’t know men had less of a right to decide what life was.
i totally agree with funny_guydude
thats a hard question, becuz the reality is, that the baby is also a part of them but lets be honest…they never stick aound, so the truth is, no, they shouldn’t have a say..
ps: im being bias,,….im pro life
I think somebody else said this on an earlier post of yours: if the woman doesn’t want the baby, she can abort it; if the man doesn’t want the baby, he still pays child support. That’s not right. Of course, neither is abortion…
nope…now when they grow vaginas and are called Gina instead of Jim…then maybe they can have a say. personally i think it should be up to the woman because she is the one who has to live with the decision.
Absolutely we should. Normally a guy plays a big role in conception. I know we don’t carry the baby, but it’s still our kid too.
I think if the man wants the child then he should have a say in it. If the woman doesn’t want the baby she could just give it up to him.
of course! he may not be having the baby, but he’s both just as responsible as she is, and also has the same concerns about life after the baby.
dont play dumb…
You are so transfixed by the topic of abortion, Dan. Seriously, is there something you need to tell us? :trey:
The whole “it’s a woman’s body” is just kind of a bullshit argument, because the fetus is its own human, not an arm or leg. The fetus can’t stick up for itself, even though it has all the rights you or I have. Own DNA, the like. (I’d link my argument again, but this is getting ridiculous.) So the woman really doesn’t have that much say. Yes, the thing is in her, but that doesn’t mean she owns it. That doesn’t mean she automatically has custody of it. Blah blah blah.
FIND A NEW TOPIC.
Well, it does bring in the comments like wild.
yes, it IS part theirs. But only if the girl is unsure. If shes unsure and he wants it, fine have it. But if she Absolutely wants it/ doesnt want, I dont think his opinion should sway it.
A fetus is human…..but honestly people. How grossly over populated does western civilization need to be before you get a clue? People starve everywhere in the world and you’re concerned about a bunch of kids that their parents obviously don’t want. I read in someone’s comment 85,000 abortions is Florida. I say good, forget morality, I’d rather thin out the herd and think about our species in the long run. Not this narrow ignorant world view that I’m seeing here. “God” isn’t going to fix the problem, and it certainly won’t just fix itself. Think of the bigger picture and not just your own petty views.
maybe they should have a say…its their baby too.
Not only should men have a say, but so should the baby. Its the babys body not yours, selfish. But the fact that abortion is the american holocaust is a different topic.
If a man doesn’t have a say in this then niether should he have to pay child support. Why is it that men get all the negatives, and none of the positives? Feminests are not trying to advance womans rights. They are trying to turn men into second class citizens.
Incedentally i’ve seen guys reduced to tears, begging their girlfreinds not to get an abortion.
nooo
“A fetus is human…..but honestly people. How grossly over populated does western civilization need to be before you get a clue? People starve everywhere in the world and you’re concerned about a bunch of kids that their parents obviously don’t want.” “I read in someone’s comment 85,000 abortions is Florida. I say good, forget morality, I’d rather thin out the herd and think about our species in the long run.”
I love how nazi assholes like this are on the other side. It makes it so much more easy.
Yes, it’s his child, too.
Although I’m against abortion anyway.
I would say yes, but less of a say since the fetus doesn’t grow inside of men.
This my absolute, concrete view of abortion.
If you don’t want a child, don’t raise him and hate him. Don’t make him feel like he’s not wanted.
Save a broken heart………..
he should be able to voice their opinion, but ultimately it should be left up to the woman. if the woman cares enough about the father, then she’ll honor his wishes, and if she doesn’t, then they shouldn’t even be having a child together anyways and then [if she wants] terminate.
Well, it depends. If we have a raper in our hands, I think not. But if the man happens to be a loving hubsand, than the decision should be completely mutual, because (after all) the child is also his child. Both need to be very considerate toward the other’s opinion and feeling. None of this gender-downsizing business.
If you bow to and run your life by the supreme authority (God of the Holy Bible) It doesn’t matter what men or women think: Only His viewpoint is important.
You (women and men) are completely taken out of the decision entirely.
If, on the other hand, you are driven by selfish thinking (obsessed with your “Rights”, your body, your personal goals, etc.), you then worship yourself instead of God. It’s still not your choice to make, but you think it is because you are your own self-proclaimed authority.
CHOOSE to obey.
I think that men should be able to aid a woman in the decision to have an abortion or not, but honestly the end all be all decision should be the woman’s. In refrence to custody issues or even battle between a couple, most likely the child will be awarded to the mother over the father.
I love this site by the way.
First off, OF COURSE men should have the right to make LEGISLATIVE decisions about abortion.
Polling organizations find little difference between men and women on the topic of abortion (see Gallup’s aggregate polls of 2001-2003), so there is no logical reason to disenfranchise almost half the US population over the issue. Would you also like to disenfranchise post-hysterectomy women? How about virgins? Women whose husbands have a low sperm count? Where does that line of thinking end? It ends in a modren Dark Ages and societal ruin.
One of the main arguments for abortion seems to be that the woman should have the right to control her own bodies. I think people should have the OBLIGATION to control their own bodies. People talk as though pregnancy were a cosmic accident, something scientists have failed to provide an answer for. In reality, it is the direct result of sex.
Let me clarify something: I WILL NOT LEGALLY CHALLENGE A WOMAN’S RIGHT TO AN ABORTION in cases of rape, incest, or danger to the woman’s life. I abhor abortion in all instances. I do find it appalling that a woman would kill a baby simply because of the horrific circumstances of it’s conception, but it’s not a point I will press.
Some argue that the father of the child should have the right to give his opinion on the abortion of the child. Garsh, that’s generous of you, letting people air their opinions and all…
If a woman lets a man make a ‘deposit’, then he should have some say in the ‘withdrawal’. Control of the woman’s body begins, in this case, with the decision to have sex. If a woman gets pregnant without the ‘help’ of a man, then by all means let her make the entire decision. But the ‘couple’ needs to face the consequences of their decision together.
It should be a descision reached between the two.
The answer to this question should always be no. I have an aunt who aborted a child when she was young, and she’s still beating herself up over it.
Yes, men should have a say.
I think the question is… is it MORALLY right to abort a baby. Not, is it a woman’s right to abort a baby. Hmm… if we allow mothers to kill their unborn… why is there ferver and outrage over a mother killing five of her own toddlers? Are we destroying human life? Yes. Are we killing someone? Yes.
Besides, I think the whole argument that men are trying to control a woman’s body is just plain ridiculous. The argument continues that if we oultaw abortion, soon women will have no control over their own bodies.
Yes they should definantly have a say. I mean c’mon its there baby too.
“I love how nazi assholes like this are on the other side. It makes it so much more easy.”
Yep, because I’m totally forcing my beliefs on people and telling them what they can and can’t do(Y) good call on that one sparky. I’m not encouraging it, I’m just looking at the positive side to a negative evil rather than trying to force my own moral views down other people’s throats……how nazi of me.
HELP, yes. but the final decision should be up to the woman.
there are howeveer certain cases in which the man should have no say.
for example, if he is abusive.
Some men are going to answer this question.
But, no.
Whose baby is it? Well…
Who is it in?
The male should decide with the woman whether it’s OK for her to do so or not if it’s his baby too.
But, in legal standards, no.
stevogvsu:
You weren’t forcing your views on anyone. But your views were very nazi-like in that you say “forget morality”, and you’re in favor of massive slaughter to end world hunger. Lets take it a step further. How about people that are starving just EAT other starving people! Before long world hunger will be a thing of the past!
There is enough food for everyone. The problem is its distribution. We are hardly over-populated. Good call on that one “sparky”
for better or worse, men have only the right to convince women whether to abort or not, but the woman doesn’t have to pay any heed to his words. I don’t like it, thinking about a man that wants to keep the child powerless against a woman that doesn’t. but there’s bound to be a difference when women are designed to bear children and men aren’t. the reality and part of the problem is men don’t have any real recourse when there’s a conflict of interest. That, in my opinion, is unlikely to change soon.
Yes, she didn’t get up on herself and get herself pregnant all on her own. It’s his child too. Though, for the record, I am most definitely against abortion.
We always hear about how abortion should always be a consideration for cases of rape, incest and danger/death to the mom. These are not the MAIN reason for abortions, but are alway brought up as valid reasons for the continued practice.
I wonder how many abortions are performed on women who are married and in relatively stable marriages. Not only married, but that wife and husband do want children. How many times has abortions been performed because the wife feels (for whatever reason) that it’s ‘inconvenient’ to have the child at ‘this’ particular time? How often does this happen and the husband never learns of it?
Granted, in situations like this, there is an OBVIOUS problem, but shouldn’t there be something in place to allow the husband some say when this happens??
Haha, way to rip off that one author…what was his name? I say forget morality because….well….not everyone’s morality is that same….I would be, I think, rather “nazi” to tell someone who feels that abortion is ok that they cannot have one because you don’t agree with it. Wouldn’t you say? Science is the reason we have enough food. But, the Malthusian trap STILL does exist. Eventually, heck maybe in hundreds of years, there WILL be to many people. I personally would rather delay that as much as humanly possible my friend. But whatever, I’m done. Anyone who mocks world religions isn’t worth my time anyway.
Yes, they should have a say in it, but it should primarily be decided by women. It’s a women’s health issue and a women’s morality issue, but only a morality issue for men. Women have so much more at stake than men do.
Stevogvsu:
I don’t know who I could be rippong off, but whatever. I would tell someone they cannot steal because I don’t think its ok. I would tell someone they cannot murder because I think its not ok. How is this any different? I just put up a link that showed what muslim extremists are killing people over. I didn’t mock anyone
Leaving aside the moral issue of abortion, if someone expects them to support the child for the next 18 years then they should have a say.
Granted, muslim extremists are killing people…But christians have forgotten the time when their mainstream killed people, thousands of people, and for less reason even than offensive cartoons.
Yes, but womens’ opinions in this issue have a more important role.
yes
Absolutley. Abortion affects men too, in the realization that they have murdered an innocent human being.
God Bless,
Right Winger
Stevogvsu:
Yes, Christians killed people, and it’s dark stain on our history. But don’t forget that we have always been persecuted for our beliefs, and we still are. In Roman times, Nero stung up Christians to be “torches for his garden” and would throw them to the lions to be eaten alive.If you think persecution doesn’t continues, just take a look at China or Africa. You’ll see. We have always had more reason than cartoons, the Crusades were about getting a holy city back, not some cartoons. And fyi, most Muslims are not attacking people. They want the killing to stop.
God Bless,
Right Winger
Men should have a say, but not the final say.
Yes, they plant the seed!
no, guys shouldn’t have a day about it.
yes but he also should take responsibility, be the man, and support the kid financally, and emotionally
in support of the woman and what ever her choice is
yes because the men helped bring that life into this world and if they are of sound mind and able to think of everything going on in that situation then they should have a say because considering how (and no offense on this one) but women ten to be more emotional then men and it only gets worse when they’re pregnant which clouds thier brain from rational thought and therefore should be left up to people that are involved and thinking rationally
just a thought
anthony
if abortion was something that needed some thinking to come to a conclusion, men should be able to input their thoughts. after all, a man does HAVE to be involved somehow for the situation to arise. but abortion is something that should be a no-brainer for everyone. thats why our generation is smaller than the generation leaving us. we’ve killed half our generation before they were even born. something sobering to think about…
I liked what Anatomic Conversion had to say, I think they should be completely involved in the process….if they can be found.
If he is the father of the child then by all means yes. He should be man enough to shoulder the responsibility of either helping to support this new life or condeming it to death. And I say that as a man who has done so, and now has a 13 year old daughter.
i think that the men, if the father, should have a choice, but as you said, they did not and will never go through with it, so no, they should not have the ultimate say. But really, if you made the decision to not use protection, then should it really be your right to kill the child?
People who say men shouldn’t be involved obviously believe that abortions are all about the women and not the babies, which makes them a pro-choice by default.
I think they have already, there are men on the Supreme Court. Was this a trick question?
if the man is the father of the child then yes i think so. though he is not carrying the child if he wants to take responsability for it, i tink that his input should at least be considered. however…i do understand that it is ultimately (it seems) the woman’s choice..because it is her body, adn she’ll be carrying the baby for 9 months and things will change for her in that time period. things for the guy don’t relaly change that much until the baby comes into this world, because until that time he is not needed (he’s already done his”job”)
i’m not pro abortion anyway. but i do think that since it was more than one person who got into this situation, the other person’s ideas should be considered. the other dilemma is if the man wants the abortion adn the woman doesn’t….then what happens. but ‘m not sure if you’ve already addressed this one or not.
I don’t actually think abortion should be allowed, however it is and no one can ignore that fact, so just saying “Abortion shouldn’t be legal” doesn’t help the problem at hand. Men should be allowed in the decision making. Did they not help to create the baby….or in some people’s opinion, the mass of cells? Men have every right be involved. Abortion affects them too.
If they are in a relationship or even if they were just screwing around then yes he should have a say!! It’s his baby too and even if the woman/girl doesn’t want it she took the risk by having sex and if he wants it then he should have that choice. This is many ways seems unfair to the woman but I believe it would be the right thing to do!
And by saying if he wants it I mean that he is going to raise and take care of the baby, not make her have it then take care of it when she didn’t want it in the forst place. And I should say for the record I’m not a firm believer in either having or not having an abortion, I was giving a hypothetical answer to a hypothetical question.
The problem is, anti-abortionists think that abortion is murder, which is a sin to all genders. It’s an offensive issue that applies to everyone.
I believe in abortion. I want it to be legal. But I also know that it has to be a fair vote, and in a fair vote, everyone has a voice.
Speaking as a former fetus myself …and a man YES! If anything for the objectivity.
I don’t agree with murder but if it’s legalized (I hope not!), then the man should definitely have a say. It takes two to tango, or should I say make a baby.
Pesky
They can have a say if they want but they should not be able to control it.
yes
Yes…but only to save the life of the child
devil’s advocate: can someone explain to me how the argument “how would you feel if you got aborted?!” MATTERS? the fact is, you don’t even exist, so it’s a moot point.
how bout this one: what if your wife or partner or whoever tells you, the man, to get his tubes tied (whatever the man’s version is)? i mean, obviously, his partner gets to put in her opinions, but ultimately, wouldn’t it be the man’s decision what do with his body?
Half of the unborn human being is from men, so men should have half of the decision
If they are the father, then yes… after all, it is not just their seed in them, it’s their child as well. I mean if women don’t want a baby, then don’t have unprotected sex. Abortion is just a cop-out for mistakes that people make. It’s teaching today’s culture that it’s ok to screw up and not have to pay the consequence at the price of another life.
Should men have as say…ah YA. If they even care enough to say anything then they are close enough to you that there opinion should mater. Also even if we are talking about general legislation…the answer is still YES. Hey look something happen..YOU had sex. YOU choose it. To cover it up you are killing someone. That is no better than me killing a whitness to a hit and run accident. If you were raped…..I feel even more sorry because you didn’t do anything. Still…two wrong don’t make a right. We should all be happy that our parents are pro-life. At least thay were for you…..
~G~
people today are way too sex-obsessed. sex is about procreation, not showing your “love” for another person. that’s lust, that’s indulgence. you want pleasure, eat a fucking bowl of ice cream. you want to show your love for another human, do something for them, not for 10 minutes of physical pleasure.
if you aren’t planning for a baby, don’t have sex. abortion wouldn’t be an issue if we weren’t all so dumb, not thinking about what’s going to bring TRUE happiness. these days it’s all about getting to heaven, getting laid, getting rich, getting more stuff, getting more food.
sorry for the rant. this topic is just really difficult.
I think the question is can a man decide law that only effect women not does the man have a right in determining whether a woman has an abortion if abortion remains legal….
The answer is obviously yes. I may not be able to speak for the woman, but I can speak for victim of the abortion: the baby in the womb that the mother is killing. I have been there. I think I would say something like “Please mommy don’t kill me. Give me a chance at the life that you and daddy have had.”
Deffinitely. It takes both man and woman to create what might be destroyed. Therefore, they should both have say in the matter.
NO.
Nope.
The man should have an input, but I think the woman’s opinion would matter more.
Yes. If I was a fetus I’d want the compassionate to have say …whom ever they are.
no
alot of people here are saying it takes two to tango…yes it does and yes it is 50/50 when CREATING the child…but the woman is the one who carries it for 9 months and gives child birth….i think the final decision should be up to woman alone…sorry boys but we are the ones who would have to be put through it…..i think a man should very well be able to voice his opinion about the matter though especially if they were the father…but like i stated before abortion is wrong unless it is a serious situation like if the woman was raped…therefore abortion should still be legal in some states if not all….no one really knows what they feel about the matter unless they were in that kind of situation, whether they would want to keep the baby, give it life and put it up for adoption, or get an abortion( yes it is an option)….its the woman herself and her own feelings in the situation no one else. if any other situation and you consider abortion you are cruel, irresponsible and you need a class on safe sex again obviously….but non the less women should make the final decision in this matter.
since I think it should be illegal then it is a non issue. However, if kept legal then I think that is complicated. Some who support life would say yes a guy should have a say, but what if a woman wants to keep it to full term and the guy wants her to have an abortion. How supportive are we then of his decision? So it can cut both ways. I pray that women will not abort their children and I pray that we can be compassionate toward women who are faced with such difficult decisions and love on them as Christ loves them.
I am opposed to abortion except in cases of rape or excessive danger to the mother. In either case I think it would be absurd if the father could veto the mother’s option to have an abortion.
In the present circumstances, giving fathers the right to veto abortions (except in the above cases) would, in theory, help reduce the genocide of unborn chidren…
Part of me is troubled by the fact that this is something only women go through. A man will never know what it is like to have the awesome responsibility of carrying a baby inside his body. He will never know the terror a lonely unwed mother feels. He will never know what labor feels like. He will never be a mommy, no matter how he cares for a child. There is something totally unreplaceable about a mommy. It is a deep, profound responsibility at a minimum. A man will never experience that. I’m pro life, but a part of me recognizes that it is not only an human child involved but that it is in the body of a woman, not a man. Like it or not we are endowed with that gift and responsibility. Morally we don’t have the right to kill a child, but for nine months that child’s fate is inextricably linked to our own.
it should be the womans choice.
Yes, most certainly.
I would like to think a couple could talk it over, but in the end it does need to be decided my the person who is pregnant.
Ofcourse the man should have a comment on the proposed abortion – the child is his aswell as hers!
“abortion should not be legal period” says the man who can’t be impregnated by rape, and then must carry for nine months the growing reminder of that rape, enduring uncomfortable and sometimes painful physical changes. “not legal period” says the man who won’t have to go through HOURS or unrelenting, mind bending AGONY to birth the child of rape. “not legal period” says the man who doesn’t have to risk a life threatening disease – diabetes – brought on by a rape induced pregnancy, who won’t have to live with that disease the rest of HIS life, who won’t have to worry about complications and possible death during the birth of that rape created child. “not legal period” says the man who won’t have to decide to keep the child of rape after birth, looking at the child every day and being reminded of the rape. “not legal period” says the man who won’t have to endure FORCED CONTACT with if the decision is to keep the child and the “father” sues for his LEGAL paternal rights. “not legal period” says the man with no concern for a 9 year old girl impregnated by incest. It is a woman’s body, a woman’s risk – it should always be the woman’s decision. Otherwise, a woman is just an incubater on legs; let’s start handing out the ownership papers.
The whole argument for the legislation on abortion was about a women’s right to her own body. A man plays no part in the later part of abortion. It sucks yes, realize the current legislation.
Talk about coincidence – I just closed a webpage of pro-choice “facts” because I was getting so frustrated.
Men can offer an opinion, but the final choice should be the woman’s (although that choice should most definitely be NO). But I won’t get into that here; I want to go watch my classic Disney movies =)~ and do homework in a good mood.
Later Dan -
Also, if the father has the right to veto the abortion, except in cases of rape or threat to the womans health, how do we go about getting all the dead beat dads out there to step up to the plate on their responsibilities. And you know they’re there! In large quantities; aren’t we always complaining about the unwed MOTHERS on welfare? Interesting how everyone gets rabid about forcing the woman to endure a pregnancy and give birth, but there is no rabid movement to force fathers to step up to the plate after the child is born. There is no shame attached to a father who abandons his child, but woe the tarnished evil woman that can “give away” her child.
Props to mssmss925 (did I get that right?) for pointing out how we’re so quick to decide, regulate, control and legsilate a WOMAN’S body. But you never hear anything about controling the MAN’S body.
Absolutely. 50% of the would-be child is from the man’s sperm.
So much for that; reading other people’s comments got me riled up anyway. Especially ones like this:
“It is a woman’s body, a woman’s risk – it should always be the woman’s decision. Otherwise, a woman is just an incubater on legs; let’s start handing out the ownership papers.”
An incubator on legs? Because she won’t get rid of something that she helped create? I can completely understand the arguments concerning rape and incest; those are terrible things, and to have to live with them or a child that results from them must be a hardship that I (hopefully) will never understand. But you’re still carrying a human life inside you. Don’t give me that bullshit about how a fetus is “human but not a human being“, because it’s just that – BULL. From the moment of conception that embryo is a human being, complete with the potential to become one of the most influential or important people of our time. And what about this comment, I loved this one:
“can someone explain to me how the argument “how would you feel if you got aborted?!” MATTERS? the fact is, you don’t even exist, so it’s a moot point.”
Um, guess you missed this, but that IS the point. You wouldn’t exist. Without any regard for the person that you coud be today, you were just cut down. Someone decided, “Eh, it’s not necessary for this person to live – it’s not like it’s the President or something,” and you were gone. How do we know? When a fetus is aborted, how do we know that we’re not killing the one person who might bring about world peace, or end world hunger? There’s no way to know, and even if we could, it shouldn’t matter. Every fetus deserves the chance to grow up and become someone. No one has the “right” to take away that chance.
> They should at least know about the pregnancy ‘n alternatives….
> Unless they’re a problem person, then all bets are off.
Peace
No, they shouldn’t because first of all, the man has NO idea what it is like to have to birth a child, nor should he have a say in what a woman should do with her body. If a woman wants an abortion, a man shouldn’t be the one to stop her. And if a man wants a baby that bad, maybe he should find another woman who can take the emotional and physical tax of having a child(which a man would know NOTHING about.)
Eva.
I think the guy should only have a say if he is willing and DOES help with the child. If he is going to leave and never think about it again… then HE has aborted it. Why should he be hypocritical and tell the girl to kill a child he doesn’t even want if she does? If he does take responsibility for an act in which he was a part of and sticks around, keep the child! In the case that he does stick around and voices that he wishes for the woman to keep the child, I would think the woman should listen. (This does not mean that she then can skip out and leave him alone with the child, that is irresponsibility on her part.) As it was said, it takes two to tango!
Overall, I hold the opinion that abortion is wrong. The child didn’t do anything wrong, it didn’t create itself. Take responsibility for your action (in the case it wasn’t rape. if it was rape then that is for further discussion.) There is always adoption, which is beneficial for all parties involved many times.
of course.
Yes
The male is 50% the participant. Males are also about 50% of the ones aborted. I don’t see why men shouldn’t be included in the decision.
yes, with terms though. There are some men who put pressure to abort.
>>”not legal period” says the man who won’t have to
>>decide to keep the child of rape after birth,”
The WOMAN doesn’t have to keep the child. She can give it up for adoption to someone who wants a child.
—————————————————-
>> “But you never hear anything about controlling the MAN’S body.”
Not true. Several states have considered enforced chemical sterilization for men convicted of sexual crimes.
—————————————————-
>> “[the] government should[n’t] be involved at all other than
>> to monitor it as it does all health care to keep it safe.”
Safe? Abortion? The whole point of abortion is to KILL.
—————————————————-
>>”I admit that I’m completely biased because I don’t believe
>>in abortion at all, so I can’t really be objective…”
Everyone is biased. No one is objective. Don’t be afraid to stand up for what you believe.
—————————————————-
>> “There is no shame attached to a father who abandons his child”
Really? Does that mean “dead-beat dad” is a term of endearment?
—————————————————-
>> “no one really knows what they feel about the matter
>> unless they were in that kind of situation”
Seems a lot of people want to make moral decisions based on how they feel.
—————————————————-
>> “Legalize it or not, abortion will continue”
Rape will continue. Perhaps we should legalize that too. You know, make it safer.
—————————————————-
>>”personally i think it should be up to the woman
>>because she is the one who has to live with the decision.”
Yes, and the baby DIES with the decision.
—————————————————-
>> “Monkeys throw poo.”
So true, so true…
i think that a man is just as competent to lend advice to a woman on abortion as a woman is, however its the womans decision whether or not to follow that advice. if it came down to whether or not men should be allowed to make the final decision, i would have to disagree and say that men would be overstepping their bounds
YES. nobody is safe swimming in estrogen ocean.
what i mean is women are extremely moody when pregnant, and calk, cool, rational decisions arent always a strong point with a hormone overload.
This discussion cannot procede unless we are talking about the same thing. You want to know about who gets to make decisions about taking innocent life. Infanticide.
The decision ought to be made the same way a decision about (for example) a 4-year old’s life is made.
The fact that a mother was raped by a third party does not justify the execution of an innocent child. Adding murder to the crime of rape does not lessen the sum of evil. Human life is not less valuable because it has sinful origins. A person should be guilty of a capital crime before being condemned to execution.
Yes. And no. Men should get to have a say if they helped to concieve that life. But ultimately – if abortion is to be allowed at all – the final say ought to be with the woman. It is her body on the line and if there is any risk to her own health that should be her call. And her husband/boyfriend ought to be supportive of her. In an ideal world. Where we would never need abortion anyway because people would protect themselves and not even get into a situation like that. THEN abortion would only ever be a “if this pregnancy continues the mother will die” scenario and not a “oh I spread my teenage legs and no I am up the duff and screw it – I will use abortion as contraceptive”
Just read the above comment. Intfanticide and abortion are two totally different issues. The reason why abortion is allowed (widely in western culture) is the fact that an embryo is not considered a human life until the age it reaches sentience (and feel pain) at 14 weeks.
I believe that men are a big part of the reason for a lot of abortions performed in this country every day.
Sadly, yes, there are fathers whose babies were aborted, fathers who wanted their offspring and lost it, with no say in the matter. This shouldn’t be.
But too often, women feel trapped. They go to the father of the child, hoping he will be excited about the news. He isn’t and insists that she abort the child. She needs some support to get through this — she’ll have to take maternity leave with no pay, etc. How can she do that if the baby’s father wants nothing to do with it and tells her to get rid of “the problem”?
I think a question like this presumes that the father never does have anything to do with it, and many times, he is the entire reason why the woman gets an abortion in the first place.
I should also acknowledge that the mother’s parents can and often do play a similar role.
I believe abortion is morally murder, so I think it is wrong, but I don’t believe the women who get abortions are necessarily the entire reason for that. Sometimes they are victimized in the whole situation, as well.
Which is another reason why calling the pro-abortion position “pro-choice” is incorrect terminology. Every choice the baby will ever make is lost in the act of abortion, and many times, the abortion is almost forced upon the baby’s mother. Where is the “choice” in all of that? There isn’t one at all.
As a pro-lifer, I am more pro-choice than any abortion advocate ever was. I also advocate the mother choosing before she has sex about whether or not she wants to get pregnant. Once she is, the “choice” has already been made.
no, because i don’t believe in abortion period. if i did believe in abortion, it should be a joint decision, however the woman is always going to have the final say because it’s her body.
It takes two to create a life, therefore the father should have the right to know, and have some opinion. The ultimate choice, logically, belongs to the woman.
NO! A woman should have the choice-it’s HER body!
Hell No!
Okay so maybe yes.. hehe
I think that both people, the man and the woman should have a say in whether an abortion should be had. An abortion can affect the man as much as the woman.
YES, the man should certainly have a say in whether or not the woman gets the abortion. Here’s why: Men are supposed to be the spiritual leaders, both inside and outside of a marriage. Because abortion is MURDER, and therefore a SIN, it is indeed a spiritual issue, and the man should take a stand and tell the woman not to get an abortion. If, however, the man is in favor of the abortion, he needs to keep his mouth shut and learn from God’s word.
I have no idea where to swing on this. I’m leaning towards pro-choice, and that men should have some say (although more weight falls on women’s opinions on this matter). But I’ve been batted around from one side to the other on this issue.
yes
Hi Im new would u like to talk?
Hmm.
I really don’t know.
Yes, because it takes a woman as well as a man to make the baby in the first place, so they have an idea about the life that is at hand.
[ariana]
I think if the man and woman are close enough (i.e. not a one night stand or rape) the man is going to have a say. When is the last time you’ve heard about someone running over their man to get an abortion? And what if your man tried to make you have an abortion…that is not just a violation of women’s rights, but of HUMAN rights. I support abortion, just because think it’s more important that people do it in a sanitary and safe way then going into a back alley somewhere and having it done dangerously. Because, face it, it’s going to be done, whether it’s legal or not, sort of like pot and when they placed a ban on alcohol. I personally think, until the fetus develops it’s own heart beat, it’s just a lump of chemicals. Even a sperm is a potential life. Is using a condom killing babies? Where do you separate “life” from “lump of chemicals”. What about the morning after pill? What if a happily married couple had sex and the protection failed and the wife got pregnant? The point is, abortion is not just for the lusty and immoral. There are legitimate reasons to allow women access to safe, sterile abortions.
I’d say yes, especially if he wants to keep the child. Although personally I don’t believe in abortion except in cases where the mother’s life is at serious risk. Let’s face it, anyone who doesn’t realize that pregnancy is a risk of having sex didn’t pay much attention in health class, and rape babies aren’t as common as ones where both people entered into that situation on their own.
I believe the woman should considered the man’s opinion, but it is really her choice… It depends on the situation… Are they a married couple? Because I believe the husband has more right to give his opinion in that case.
The court systems have ordered that men are equally responsible for any lives that they help to create and order support to be paid for any child that the women chooses to raise. The courts have also determined that men and women should have equal rights. Then there is no question… a man should have every bit as much right that to demand that his child be aborted as a woman has to abort his child without his consent. Since no proper feminist thinks that men should be allowed to abort the woman’s child without her permission, but rather that the woman may abort the man’s child at any time the whim appeals to her. If there is truly any one out there interested in equality of rights (as opposed to just power grabbing women’s rights and to heck with fairness and equality) then there is really only one way to make men’s rights and women’s rights equal on this matter… nobody gets to choose an abortion. This is especially true since who the father might be can’t really be determined to the court’s satisfation until after the birth. OK ladies… is it equal rights that you want, or just more power at the expense of the unborn and anyone else who gets in your way????
I think its purely the woman’s choice. Its her body. So what if the man contributed a little bit o’ baby juice? What if a woman is raped? Everytime she sees that child it will remind her of what happened to her. She would grow to hate it.
So no. Men should not be involved. It’s bad enough they rule this Earth. They don’t need to decide what we do with our bodies for us.
the kid is half his.
men should have a say, especially if the woman is married. but could anyone force a woman to carry the baby to term?
They can have an opinion, but women should make the official decisions. I find it a little odd when I see men holding signs and screaming from a woman’s right to choose.
Yes, as long as they do not have the majority voice.
Abortion should be the baby’s choice.
Hmm. I think it depends on the situation. In a rape case? Obviously not. In a stalking case, definitely not. In a married couple-you’d hope the guy would have say-but these things are too diverse to decide without the individual situations being accounted for, and thank God for that at least.
it depends.
you just said a “man”, i’m assuming in general; not just the father of the child.
a man should have every single right in the final say; i’m pro-choice…. not pro-female choice. even though i happen to be a girl. hmm.
No i dont think men have any right to tell a woman to get an abortion………though i’m kinda one-sided on this issue because i dont believe in having an abortion……you are killing a baby! Plus, “if you make your bed, you should lie in it!”
gee, I don’t know….do men help make the situation?!?!
I think that the baby is his too, and that a woman should respect his wishes. But, if the woman wants an abortion, and that man wants her to keep the baby, he needs to take care of the baby when it is born.
I think it’s situational, but yes if there is a relationship I think the man ought to be able to have a part.
As a father, my daughter is the most precious giftin my life. I would never be the same and better man I am without her in my life.
I would hope that I would be part of the process.
heck no
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<TD id=HB_Focus_Element vAlign=top width=”100%” background=”" height=250 UNSELECTABLE=”off”>def. because they are the father and should have a say in what happens to his child. As long as he actually cares. if he chooses to leave the mother, then no, because he isn’t a part of their lives anymore.
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