October 26, 2010
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Talking To Your Dad About Sex
A new study indicates women who talk to their fathers about sex are more likely to wait to have sex and will have less sexual partners.
The person who ran the study suggested some of the most sexually active women wished their fathers had shared more with them about sex. Here is the link: Link
My mother was always open with me about sex so I felt comfortable talking to her about anything. But my dad only brought up the issue once and I was 18 at the time. He told me if I got a girl pregnant, I had to marry her.
Who were you more comfortable talking about sex with, your mom or your dad?
Comments (76)
Neither.
I’d rather gouge my eyeballs out than talk about sex with my father.
Easy one. Dad died when I was 3 years old. We never had a real meaningful talk about sex before he died. For that matter mom and I never talked either.
my mom is more likely to ask me seriously about it, my dad jokes about it but doesn’t believe me about being a virgin. i’m more likely to talk to my mom about it, but i’ll answer any questions either of them have about my sex life.
Neither. The closest we came to it was my dad asking if I was a virgin, I said “yes” and he proceeded to laugh at me while pointing.
Neither one.
Neither of my parents or siblings talked to me about sex soooo…
I learned literally ALL my sexual info from my sisters’ Cosmopolitans
Basically I learned how to give an AMAZING blow job before I knew exactly where babies came from.
A few years later I eventually learned, but it would have been nice knowing a little earlier.
My mother never really talked about it, though she did show me a bunch of those educational sex ed videos when I was in elementary school. When I started high school, my father just asked me every now and then if I was having sex. He told me to be careful, and to watch out for certain types of guys.
@PervyPenguin - man, i laughed so hard at that!
I haven’t actually talked to either of my parents about sex.
neither… I think if they were a little more open about it I wouldn’t feel like I had to hide it and I would have waited longer.
I never talked about sex with either of them; nevertheless, I’m saving sex for marriage.
My dad only told me to always use condoms. I then told him that he should have said that to my sister who was 16 and pregnant.
Oh and once he asked if I was gay.
Neither. My family is just not the type to share personal matters. Heck, we barely even know when someone is in a relationship.
Neither.
I talk to my dad about everything else (period, yeast infection, birth control pills, etc.) but sex. I mean we’ve talked about sex in a joking matter but nothing serious. I’m a little more open with my mom, just haven’t told her I’ve had sex before.
Hookers.
@eomona - So did he. D;
It’s about equal, in the sense that it’s not horrible with either, but there are (different) awkward aspects to both.
Hahaha! The thought of talking to either of my parents about sex cracks me up!
Neither. The topic isn’t discussed unless it is my parents saying “Just don’t.”
Ha, little do they know.
There are constantly discussions about sex at my Dad’s house now!! But we are all married… so that makes it ok! lol
Haha neither. We all just kinda know that we know.
It makes me wonder where your ideas come from…
I talk to my dad more about sex than my mom. My mom doesn’t like to acknowledge the fact that I have a sex life, so she’s not as game to talk about it. My dad has 3 daughters, he’s used to it. Haha.
My parents always talked to me about sex and said “remember, test drive a car before you buy it!” or something like that…
Yes, they scarred me enough to the point I’m 22 and still a virgin.
That’s how it’s done.
My mother thought sex was dirty….I suppose she had her reasons. Dad was a country boy and sex was normal and natural and could be something special if one partner didn’t think it was dirty. I remember one time I went to bed leaving my dad and James up. James told me later that dad had asked about our sex life. Evidentally, James told him and Dad was satisfied he had done a good job. Anyway, it allayed his fears enough he never asked me.
Your wife.
Mother, duh.
The whole idea of women talking to their fathers about sex… squick. Seriously, squick.
Maybe it’s that fathers who insist on talking to their daughters about sex make the girls very uncomfortable. I think a man like that would be very possessive and controlling. So the girls don’t have sex… but for all the wrong reasons.
Even if I’m 40 with 3 kids, my dad will still think that his little girl is innocent. I’d rather not break his heart today.
I have never talked to either of my parents about sex.
@Rob_of_the_Sky - i just love your answer!
im shocked to see that most people have posted “neither” as reply.
my mom was the big influence of our lives, so yeah she was the one in my family that put her foot down, pointed her finger and said “dont have sex before youre married or we will disown you, you’ll get aids and die and go to hell.”
there has never, ever been a situation where i had to talk to my dad about sex. in the conversations i have with my dad, that word doesn’t even exist.
personally i cant say i would want my dad to talk to me on that subject, thats wrong to me, unless of course if i didn’t have a mother, only then do i think ied accept it.
this is a very interesting post. the reason i think that most sexually active women would appreciate their fathers conquering that subject is because, maybe they wanted a male figure that mattered to them to teach them about it?
or maybe they wanted more attention from their dads? or maybe a sign that their fathers care about them?
forgive me, if im bending the situation, but, i think its ironic that those mostly sexually active women who for whatever reason were mostly sexually active are maybe looking for fatherly love in the form or a lover? i know i make it sound twisted. i read a book based on psycology that genreally talked about incest and this reminds me of it.
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Gross. I didn’t talk sex with my dad and I have no regrets.
My middle daughter rides to school with a friend. The friend’s dad drives them. Two weeks ago the dad heard some song on the radio and started asking the girls if the song was about an orgy. My daughter said she was shocked that he would raise the topic but when he wouldn’t let it go she wanted to jump out of the car. Instead she put her ear buds in and turned on her ipod. Very inappropriate of him in my opinion.
my mom’s pretty open with that sort of stuff… dad kinda stays out of it (with me, anyway). i think when my brother gets a bit older he’ll start the “be safe use protection” part and the “relationship/girl advice for life” part.
Definitely my mom. My dad always seemed uncomfortable with the subject.
I don’t talk about it with either of my parents. It’s none of their business, like theirs is none of mine. We’re adults about it. *shrug* I’m not promiscuous or anything of the sort described.. I don’t have daddy issues.
I’m really surprised at how many people said neither. I got my main sex education at school, but my mum always said if I needed to talk to her about sex, that she’d listen to me. The most my dad said was “Be safe, and don’t get pregnant while you’re still studying – you’ll regret it”.
Neather one, intresting idea though
I listened to my mother telling me about her experiences but not of my own until I was married and she knew I was no longer a virgin.
Neither, unfortunately.
Neither for a while. But now at 17, I find that I’m not too uncomfortable talking about it with my Mom. (Of course this might be different if I were actually discussing my sex life [which I'm proud to admit is non existent!] :p)
Umm… neither.
My sex talk was short and to the point. My Dad and I were watching one of those “Who’s my babie’s daddy?” Maury episodes… my dad looked at me and said
“That’s why you don’t have sex.”
That was the end… I felt awkward.
… “fewer” partners…
/grammar
But seriously, I was open with both of my parents and I’m 25, I’ve had 2 sex partners in my whole life.
mom’s dead and my dad makes it awkward so I talk to my best friend about it. i can’t stand the thought of my dad knowing I have sex…. it makes me feel uncomfortable. I mean i know he knows, but talking about it… idk. but i’m not an overly sexual person. i started at 17 and have been with 3 men. not bad.
Are you kidding me? It’s none of their business.
My dad smacked me across the face when he found me looking at bikini girl websites at age 13.
My mom is a moron.
So neither, I guess.
I talk to my mother quite frequently about it. She’s pretty open really and that’s a good thing. I can come to her with questions..and I know I won’t be turned down. All she said is practice safe sex and I am.
@WordsandThoughts - same here.
neither of my parents know about my sex life. i intend to keep it that way.
Neither…My mom jumps to conclusions to fast and my dad is just too shy and will question/be disapointed in me
It’s always a little awkward to talk about those things with your parents. I’d have to say though that my Father and I talked about everything with one another. He never told me that sex was bad or that he’d kill me if I had sex, he just said he’d prefer that I waited for the right guy and get married. But If i couldn’t wait until marriage, to at least use protection and be safe.
My sex talk with my Dad happened after he caught me admiring an issue of 1970′s Hustler from his personal collection. He looked at me, looked at the magazine, looked back at me and stared. I felt a cold chill run up my spine, as I thought for sure I was going to be grounded for the next twelve centuries.
“Are…are you going to ground me?” I asked,
“No,” he said “I’m not. You’re a guy and guys are attracted to girls, especially naked ones. Why would I punish you for doing something that comes naturally? At least you ain’t queer.”
My Dad, ladies and gentlemen.
I had no problem talking about sex to my mom. Both of my parents enforced the fact that it’s BAD to have sex before marriage….so when I got pregnant at 17 my mom was happy for me and my dad wanted me to “lose” it….yeah.
Will never forget my sex talk. I was 12, my dad was 6 feet tall and 330 pounds. He had one of those black addidas RUN DMC track suits on, asked me to go jogging with him. Remember, he weighed 330. We got about 2 houses away from our driveway, he asked me what I knew about sex, I said that you put your dick in the girl’s pussy and then you have a baby. He said, “yep” and to ask him if I ever had any questions, just to ask. That was it. Never talked about it again. He was a visionary.
My parents are open to talk about anything however they’re not exactly good at making conversation comfortable. I hope to have the openness they have but bring in a more comfortable atmosphere for my children one day.
My mother was kind of a religi-psycho, so she had no clue that I was even talking to boys until I was in my 20′s, after I’d already sewn my wild oats. My father, however, was pretty cool about it, and gave me some great advice, and now he loves my boyfriend like a son.
My mother knows everything but my father is half in, half out the dark. I’ve talked to my father before about my period and pads/tampons and he knows I’m on birth control, but the closest we’ve gotten to a sex talk was him telling me “Don’t do something stupid that you’ll regret” when he dropped me off at my boyfriend’s house. Yea. My mom and I told him I was on birth control for acne (which is mostly true), so I’m hoping that’s all he knows haha.
I’m pretty open with both of my parents. My dad actually knew I was pregnant before my mom did, and he bought me the test. =
My parents are very religious and they used to be very tight-lipped about sex. I knew about it, I’m sure my mom must have went over the facts briskly and thoroughly one time and left it at that. I haven’t ever talked to my dad about sex. I’m adopted; my dad is 80 and I’m just turning 21 in three months.Imagine THAT conversation. He left the sex talks to my mom and I was fine with that. It’s never bothered me that I didn’t talk to him instead; it seemed natural to me to talk to my mom about these things woman-to-woman.
My mom is a lot more relaxed about things these days. She realized I was having sex and I knew everything anyways. Kids just pick this information up here and there. I can come to her if I need to talk about pretty much anything sex-related that doesn’t involve heavy bondage.
That was a very pro-abstinence take on a study that showed no statistical causality. Just a lot of girls thinking they might have been better off if their daddies had a 15 minute talk to them about sex (shakes head). The study definied better off as ”decreased frequency in the engagement of intercourse.” I think everybody should decrease the frequency of intercourse. Maybe even abstain. Then there would be no little girls, and no daddies that have to talk to them about sex. PS I think the girls above, who have really nice stories about being open about sex with their dads, but still had sex relatively early and frequently show you that there was something wrong with the writing and/or conclusions of the so-called-study.@MrZissman - that is a good story! Does it count that my dad showed me his wwII navy printout of sketches of the different types of breasts women have? I still remember grapes, oranges, watermelons, zucchinis, etc!!!!
I was always more comfortable with my mom, but my dad and I definitely talked about it PLENTY. He was a psychologist bent on raising healthy kids with good boundaries. I’ve only had one sexual partner, my husband, and I am happy with that (since I chose a good one). Some people are probably cool with having more partners, but I really like how things have turned out for me.
You want to know the AWFUL part? Since my dad was the local psychologist that apparently a lot of people liked, my high school had him come once a year to talk to either the entire school or all the guys in the school about sex. I mean, I am sure it was useful and helpful for many people, but it was an annual ordeal for me. It was SO EMBARRASSING. lol. I mean, how many high school kids get to hear their dad talk frankly about, say, masturbation in front of the ENTIRE SCHOOL?
All the kids I went to school with who did not get to hear about sex from their dads heard it from mine.
Both…my dad use to to talk to me about sex by bringing me to porno movies…LOL…I had a cool DAD!
NEITHER.
@MrZissman - ROFL.
Let me just say… when it comes to me and my sexual partners, this survey is total BS.
What is sex?
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i would feel really weird if my parents talked to me about sex. it’s sort of a taboo topic for me.
My dad and I always talked about sex.
No one is ashamed of it in my family (except my sister). He even went as far to say he bought a hand-held shower especially for me. -__-
I’m still a virgin and plan to be for quite a while.
I don’t see how that convo with my dad would be anything except painfully awkward…but I understand the theory of it? I would have loved to had an open enough relationship to talk about things like sex or anything like that with my dad, but that’s just not the father/daughter relationship we have. Yeah, openness would have been a cool idea, but it wouldn’t work in practice…not for me, at least.
probably my mother/but for sure not my father.
friends mainly. 2 reasons why talking about sex with your father leads to less sex (imo), 1: its a buzzkill, 2: they were teenage boys once, so they use that to shed light on what teenage boys *actually* have on their agenda
@fenglingling - SPAM SPAM SPAM go away!!
my mom, i guess
ew, I would not want to talk to my dad about sex. that’s creepy. XD I mean, he gave me and my brother the sex talk when we were kids but other than that, I’m good.
I would rather talk to my mom about it, if I did. we’re close, and my dad and I are not.