October 29, 2007
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Dress and Dances
School officials in Argyle felt that some girls wore dresses to prom that were too revealing last year.
So over the summer they decided to set a new standard for the dresses. They banned “spaghetti straps, strapless gowns and backless dresses.” Here is the link: Link
This has caused discussion in the school about what is appropriate or inappropriate for wearing to a school dance.
Do you think spaghetti straps, strapless gowns and backless dresses are inappropriate for a school environment?
Comments (139)
my school already does that, it’s not a big deal.
No.
It’s only once a year. Spazzzbots.
Its ok as long as it isn’t a daily thing.
eh. that’s stupid. there’s definitely nothing wrong with strapless dresses or spaghetti straps. it’s only once a year. and none of the pretty dresses as thick ugly straps.
I don’t see anytrhing wrong with it for prom.
School environment – if that includes the classroom…yes, very difficult for the boys in the class to pay attention. Many of the schools including the one that my children go to have this rule for a long time. They also ban shirts that advertise (Coors Light, etc.).
I will add, though, in defense of these young women…from my experience shopping for my oldest daughter, it is very, very difficult to find something formal that is not revealing and at the same time doesn’t look Amish looking. If my daughter dressed as an Amish girl, I wouldn’t care, though. I wouldn’t care if she wore turtle necks for the next 20 years and skirts to the ankles. LOL
It’s an issue of taste.
Personally, I don’t see just a whole bunch wrong with either side of the issue.
There. That errant tag should be closed now.
ooh. Just kidding.
No, especially in a formal dress.
No – then what is left to wear? I went homecoming (semi-formal) shopping with my baby sister that’s in high school. If you take out those three conditions, there’s absolutely no dresses. Actually there’s no dresses even with those three conditions included. I forgot how difficult shopping with a high schooler could be…
I’ve found some pretty dresses that meet the requirements but prom [[and homecoming at my school]] are MEANT to be played up and dressy and it’s just ridiculous to deprieve girls of that. They’re supposed to be dressed up and girls tryo to be sexy and cute. Banning that is just dumb.
If their fun zone is covered, who cares if the damn thing has straps.
…And the girl on the far left will SO regret wearing that dress.
I wore a spaghetti strap dress, a strapless dress, and a backless dress to each prom I attended. They were all pretty tasteful, in my opinion. Formal attire is made that way for women. Oops?
it’s a dance. its a rare opportunity to dress up and be glamourous, why not let them have the freedom to flaunt it?
Not for everyday wear but for special occasions would be okay.
For everyday classroom stuff, yes. But prom is different. Like others have said, it doesn’t leave much to choose from.
Most prom dresses don’t have big wide straps – most are spaghetti or strapless, and I have seen many that look very tasteful and that cover what they need to. It’s a formal occasion – just make sure things are covered. I don’ tknow where a girl would find a formal prom dress that’s not one of these.
During the school day it would be inappropriate but not at a dance. They might as well require the wearing of either a nun’s habit or the garb of a muslim woman at all school functions if they are so scared of such dresses on girls at dances.
It’s like the shorts issue. Unless you wear boys’ shorts, you can’t find anything that is long enough. And seriously, I shop at thrift stores for the most part, and Target. It’s not like I’m going for style or fashion, I just want something comfortable. (And guess what– dancing in the kind of dress they apparently want us to wear SUCKS.)
I cannot recall seeing many formal dresses that had other than strapless or spaghetti straps. That is the nature of formal dresses generally. Unless they want something like a more Amish look (like LookToJesus said), this is what the designers/dress makers are making.
I never wore a prom dress (went to three proms) that didn’t have sleeves, that was in the 2000′s, but that was just my morals and standards. I see nothing wrong with the dresses in the photo. I think as long as you are properly covered, special occassions should have special exceptions. However stuff like that isn’t allowed for general daily wear in school, so I dunno. To each their own.
Not at all.
And, actually, I’m not sure what’s wrong with wearing shirts that are strapless or have spaghetti straps either. What does the width of your straps have to do with anything, as long as your boobs are covered and you have a bra on?
School dress code baffles me.
RYC: She was not drunk, nobody was. It wasn’t even much into the evening. Probably she just wanted to stir things up, and it is possible that it was a lie, just a made-up story.
That doesn’t invalidate the fact that these things happen, and of course my real interest in this memory was the train of thought it set going in me re the mechanism of how people maneouver verbally before getting to the physical, which – despite modern liberalism – has to be more difficult in a gay situation. (As a fiction writer, I’ve been told I’m best at dialogue, and in fact I find it the easiest part.)
No, it’s kind of the point.
Here is where parents should come in… those things aren’t nesessarily imodist, none of the girls up there look like hootchies! But I’m sure there are people who try to push the limits.
It’s a formal event not in school. Where there is no distractions from class.
the dresses shown above appear not to be too revealing… however i have a teenage daughter and some of the attire i’ve seen her classmates wear goes way beyond that of risque ~ jack
Having a daughter who graduated a year ago, I know it is really hard to find a prom dress that doesn’t have spaghetti straps, is strapless or backless. I think strapless and spaghetti straps can be very appropriate if you find the right one.
Backless might be a bit too much if it shows the butt dimples.
my school bans clothes like that for regular days…but for prom, i don’t see what the big deal is.
I don’t think that those sorts of dresses will lead to errant sexual deviousness that the school admins fear.
it is ridiculous that they are giving a dress code for those three things. our school had those rules. but no one followed them.
That’s ridiculous.
Some of these little girls DO go to the prom like their about to spend a night shakin it for dollars, but I don’t think spaghetti straped or strapless gowns are the issue here.
Don’t even get me started on school dress codes. This is idiotic. How does something’s being strapless make it revealing? omg, shoulders!!! Nooo! Protect the eyes of the childrennnn!!!!
No, and where would one find a ball gown that didn’t feature one of those?
No, I don’t think it’s inappropriate. I wore spaghetti straps to my prom, and I daresay I looked pretty darn elegant. “Grind” dancing at a presumably formal dance is what I would consider inappropriate.
The dresses shown in the picture look OK to me, although not particularly pretty.
I never went to my Prom. I just remember all the girls from my school looking trashy in the pictures they showed in class.
Many people are making the point that there are no dresses available that are modest and look good at the same time. I suppose people should demand them. If people would buy them then they would be sold. high school girls don’t need to reveal themselves just to “look good”.
all 3 of those dresses look fully appropriate. Prom is that one night where you just want to look hot and have everyone looking at you. let them be. Call them out when they’re wearing 2 band-aids and a cork. Now that is inappropriate.
no but belly dresses and shot short skirts and low low necks are.
actually if anything in that scenario is inappropriate for a school environment, it’s dancing.
I think they’re ok. A woman’s body should not be extremely hidden like in some countries. In my opinion at least.
bah…i think it’s difficult to find nice dresses anyways…
I really just came by to tell you “hi!”
*HUGS*
You know, I’ve never really checked out a girl’s shoulders and back. If they really want to improve crack down on inappropriate attire, school officials should focus on breasts and booty.
If a girl can find a prom dress today that meets that criteria, she is doing well. They just don’t make prom dresses without those features! Believe me. One must sew or try desperately to purchase a jacket thing that matches the dress.
Yeah. Unless the girls are fat. Then, no one wants to see that. Only if you’re like 115 or under.
That’s ridiculous. Maybe backless dresses, but what the heck? Spaghetti straps and strapless gowns aren’t bad!
no way! what does that leave… halter tops?
i think everyone needs to wear wool sweaters to the prom
and sweats… yeah sweat pants… with steel-toed moccasins
and how do girls expect to get laid on prom if they don’t reveal some skin first
No, and these people are prudes.
if they’re hot, let em go nekkid.
Wow, those girls are tramps for wearing backless dresses.
At that age, yes. Out of school, wear what you want. If something happens, who ends up being responsible? The girl? No, they will say her age makes it a lack of judgment. The parents? Uh….gee…we didn’t know she was wearing that! No…it will be the school because they allowed her to enter the dance and if you think it might end up being some guys’ fault…think again.
Probably. Don’t like them myself, anyway.
i looked like a mermaid at my prom. and i had no sleeves. but i don’t htink i was very revealing.
Maybe for a school enviroment- But Not for the Prom- their is Nothing wrong with the dresses you are showing !
prom and homecoming are a special case- the rest of the year they have to dress appropriately, let the important dances be a time when they get to dress up like the adults they see themselves to be….
NO!
Wow. Talk about strict! I don’t know, so many evening gowns are made in that style. Sounds a bit harsh to me.
In reply to your comments:
I’m not sure if it would set a record, but I think it would be cool if it did! I’ll be trying to keep up my blogging on it.
Also, thank you for the compliments. I know that in the end I’ll be happier with my choice if I choose to stay in school. I know I won’t be dropping out, I’m just having those icky freshmen, I’m not worth it thoughts.
that’s completely fine for formal wear
I agree with RaVnR, the dancing is what is outrageous. The dresses are all very nice, but orgies, not so much.
it always depends on how it looks in general. some backless dresses are beautiful, while others are slutty. *shrug*. the school districts around plano were having a gasket about it for homecoming. plano didn’t really care. which is rare for plano.
It’s hard to find dresses that can fit those standards. Seriously.
no. I understand having somerestrictions, my school we have to get our dresses approved. but seriously?
I agree with the majority. Inappropriate for every day classes, okay for the prom.
If it’s anything like our prom was, most of the girls won’t be wearing those dresses for long, anyway, LOL!
Uh…those 3 are the types that most girls wear to prom? I mean, what else are they gonna wear, Euro gowns from the 14th century!? O_o
I think all these schools need to either quit griping about the small stuff or revise the entire dress code book. I don’t think there’s anything wrong with those kinds of dresses.
They’re 18, so they’re not “girls”..
And i think those dresses are appropriate. As long as they’re not naked, or close to.. it’s all good.
Do you think spaghetti straps, strapless gowns and backless dresses are inappropriate for a school environment? Not if they’re passing out condoms and birth control pills to 11 year olds.
I can’t wait until a more modern generation takes over the school system. :]
The gowns in the photo are very mild compared to some that are available. And the girls’ hair does some cover-up, too. I think backless and strapless can be too revealing. It sort of depends on how low and how short the dress is. I think that it is really very appropriate for schools to have dress codes, and rules regarding the style of dancing students are doing. Kids know the difference between attractive and sexy in clothes, and the difference between dancing and mimicking sex acts on the dance floor!
What dress DOESN’T have those?
“Let them dress like adults….” How often do adults dress in formal wear in the real world? For many people, the only time they dress in formal wear is at high school dances and weddings. Revealing gowns are not real world except for J Lo and other red carpet celebs.
This is silly. The school shouldn’t care what students wear if they’re going to prom, as long as they have the vitals covered. School has a dress code so that students take school seriously and learn – that isn’t an issue at prom. Schools require certain standards of dress for evening lectures, fine arts performances, and academic advising conferences, for the same reason (and because families, including children, attend many of these events).
Prom is completely different – there won’t be children or anything to concentrate on learning, except maybe a new dance step.
No. It’s prom, I think they should be allowed to wear whatever, so long as they aren’t nude.
we weren’t allowed to wear them at our prom and that was back in 2003. although, i did go to a private christian school…
What else is there to wear to a formal event? I hate wearing strapless dresses and things that are low cut, but I know that I am not going to find anyother attractive option. Plus, it’s just prom and school dances. I respect the rule in a classroom setting, but not in a dance setting.
Its hard to find a dress were your not showing flesh….but they are out there….
that is absurd! those style are the base of every classy dress i’ve ever seen.
ryc: thanks. i appreciate it.
My father was yelling at me once. More recently than I’d like to recount. He had the solution, but he didn’t realize it. Children should simply be raised in barrels after about age 11. Just shove the food in through a hole, and be done with it till they’ree ohhh, about 30 or ready to be sold off for marriage.
He was referring to how I could have walked a different path than I did, but I think children in barrels would work well for America.
yes. however, it is VERY hard to find dresses without these elements, so I feel bad for the girls!
Stupid schools, of course that’s fine.
RYC: Ha Ha that made me laugh, and so true
Plus, it’s just prom and school dances. I respect the rule in a classroom setting, but not in a dance setting.
right, it’s okay to dress and dance like a slut a couple nights of the year!!
what’s left? next girls will have to wear pant suits. i don’t miss high school.
I wore a strapless to my prom. But I can see the logic behind it.
I see a problem with over-exposing clothes at school environments, but I do not consider school dances or prom a school environment.
Wow. One of my best friends is a minister in the church in Argyle, and I am hearing about this from you.
The really sad thing is that we were all together on Friday night–in Argyle…
hmm…
To answer the question: where are they having the prom? On campus or off? That could make a difference in my response.
a church in Argyle…they do have more than one church…oops
this seems like a waste of time and that there would be no dresses left for anyone to pick with those restrictions.
I think they’re okay for dances, just as long as a person isn’t showing everything. If you can’t have backless, spaghetti straps, or strapless, the choices are VERY limited.
And thanks for the comment and the prayer, my friend’s a lot better. And I edited the post (about guys wearing signs); if I see at least 10 guys wearing them, I’ll put one one too.
I might as well go to my prom in jeans and a shirt if I can’t wear the dress I want.
Conservative much?
ohh, its hard to really say. One one side, these are still children, but prom promotes and kind of adult atmosphere. Thats the tough line about being a teen, not an adult and not really a child.
If they make a rule like that, girls will show up in the nude because there just aren’t dresses that follow those rules anymore.
With that said, my school had a rule like that for all the other dances, like semi-formals and stuff. But they recognized that Prom is special for teenage girls and they don’t want to be stuck wearing Aunt Mildred’s nightgown.
i think people over react and need to look up the definition of freedom
Those gowns are appropriate. Good grief!
that ridiculous.. hardly any dresses out would meet the limits.
No, it’s not.
For a school dance yes, but for a prom NO! The kids pay for those tickets and most proms are held off campus. Let the girls wear what they want for goodness sakes.
Unless those two flanking the girl dressed in black are wearing backless dresses…those dresses should fit the new standard. Spaghetti straps are skinny little straps…well…like spaghetti….and those straps aren’t that way.
At our school, on formal day during spirit week you must be following dress code (but strapless is still okay as long as you somehow cover your shoulders)…However, I don’t think there are any real rules at dances. No jeans. Other than that, show as much as you want, maintaining some decency, of course.
thats kinda stupid. as long as your boobs aren’t hanging out and you are wearing underwear, it is appropriate.
Eh, who cares.
My prom pictures are in my photoblog.
I was rockin’ a lot of cleavage.
One night of slutty dressing never killed anyone.
of course not. it’s one night. as long it’s not breaking a law [aka nudity], they should be abe to wear whatever they want.
besides, most of the time, people won’t wear anything Janet Jackson-ish [remember that one Awards show when she was wearing a dress and one of her boobs was fully exposed except for her nipple?!] for modesty. all people DO have a sense of modesty afterall. some are just more intune with it than others.
The strapless gowns and backless dresses sure. They just don’t look good on anybody anyway.
No I don’t. It is incredibly hard to find prom dresses without those things!
that’s what my school’s dress code was for banquet (we didn’t have prom), and I didn’t think there was anything wrong with it. Granted, I would’ve rather gone in jeans and a sweatshirt…
and RYC: I guess it’s apparent that I don’t miss summer. Except for all the free time I lost because school started.
then whaddaya wear?????
Yes…Oh yes.
Not for a prom –that would actually be kinda sad. What’s a prom without spaghetti straps or strapless gowns? I imagine it would be hard to find a formal dress that meets those guidelines (the girl in the center is wearing strapless, by the way).
I don’t have a big issue with spaghetti straps, but I do have an issue with backless anything-both shirts and dresses. No matter where the prom is held, it is a school sponsored function. Therefore, the school can set rules and regulations.
The thought to ban those particular dress styles would never occur to me. That is overkill, however couldn’t officials stress modesty and only go after flagrant abusers. Of course these officials are the ones who want to ban spagetti straps which look nice. Hmm.
No. I don’t think telling girl what not to wear is a good idea. They just going to make them even more mad and rebellious. As long as the girls cover up from their knee up to their boobs I think it’s ok. Showing a little shoulder is not that big of deal.
Normal day-to-day, yes. It’s against our uniform. But the school *dance*? No!
No they can still be tasteful
ryc: good reason or not you don’t leave a job with steady income to sell real estate
what are they supposed to wear to prom..dresses with sleeves??
The formality of the occation should be training for future engagements where spagetti straps and off-the-sholder dresses will be the norm. I may understand their desire to let the kids remain kids, but homecomming dances and formals need to be a rite of passage in their own light, not with restrictions.
’nuff said…
Depends on the individual. It’s so subjective. But one girl,flat-chested, could wear the same dress as a full-chested girl and look totally different. I think the pelvis-to-pelvis dancing is more of an issue. However, many slow dances from the 40s, 50s , and 60s require hips touching to know how your partner will move, and I can tell you from experience that not even layers of tulle can disguise interested body parts, plus a slow dance will have those parts touching for a lot longer than the bump and grind! As a matter of fact, a simple box step in 1978 is what really turned me on to my husband of 25 years. Oooh,baby!
RYC:
Yes, seems like it’s meant to slap you in the face sometimes.
I’ve never been to prom, so I wouldn’t know. Save the money and stress and head right to a safe, clean afterparty.
This is just another example of American Dictatorship! Don’t taze me bro!!!
There’s nothing wrong with any of those dresses. If those are banned, I don’t know what girls would wear. I’ve only ever seen spaghetti strap, backless, and strapless dresses.
No, I think its fine and its only for one night, not every day.
okay looking at the picture you can easily see that a dress isn’t necessarily immodest just because it has spaghetti straps or no straps.
Of all the ridiculous things…
They should address the amount of cleavage shown or how much bare leg may be shown, instead of the straps. Good GRIEF I can buy a dress with long sleeves that my boobs fall out of that stops at my pantie-line (oh dear I hope I’m wearing panties and a bra…) and you can’t tell me that that’s more modest than the spaghetti strap dress the girl on the left is wearing.
They’re idiots. They should look at what really makes a dress revealing and immodest before they make dress codes. But then again that’s just my opinion.
ugh forget the dress, those girls are built like horses- get the saddle!
^ double entendre?
i do think some teenagers dance too sexy but u know if they are not making out and getting really slutty on the dance floor who cares. that is just the way their generation dances. let them wear whatever they want as long as they are not showing off their boobs or azzes
Oh, for goodness sake. It’s a school dance! You’re supposed to get dressed up and wear dresses that you wouldn’t necessarily wear during the week. If the girls were getting downright slutty, then I would think that the school officials ought to speak with those girls and their parents. Why punish everyone?
it’s not a big deal. why must people insist that we all look amish? There arent any pretty dresses that meet those requirements, unless your grandmother’s dreses are considered pretty.
If it’s any of my 3 daughter yes…other then that parents are responsible for the way their girls dress.
Now if they want every Tom, Dick & Harry gawking & lusting after their daughters then that is their business but don’t go around crying when some one sexually assaults or rapes them. I’m saying girls are at fault but you know it seems that now in days girls are dressing ever more provocative at a younger age.
only if they are Mennonite
I wore a strapless dress for my prom. Looked like a wedding dress more than anything.
No. you can have a strapless gown that doesn’t show any cleavage, and a dress with sleeves, no back and a very low plunge in the front. Straps don’t really determine whether it’s too fleshy or not. I think it’s a hard call because the same dress can look completely different on different body types. It’d be nice if everyone had their own internal meter on what is just outrageously inappropriate, but unfortunately that’s not always the case.
Not for a dance or prom. for everyday wear it is not appropriate
In my opinion, the straps have little or nothing to do with how revealing a dress is. Honestly, think about it… what guy is looking at a girl’s shoulders?? It’s cleavage the schools should have a problem with, to be completely honest… or how short it is. They never make rules that say the dress has to go past your butt, and it’s crazy how short they can get. I don’t think banning strapless dresses helps the problem at all.
At schools , unfortunatly, are usually a few kids who havent grown up yet, and may”pants” or pull down a girls gown just to get attention. I don’t think they should have banned the dresses, but maybe they were worried that someone might pull on the girls dress to make a show.
Prom is not your English Class.
Get real. Wear the dress you want.
A backless dress may be a tad bit inappropriate for a high school dance. But the others are just fine and reveal nothing.